Trans-gendered or Bi-Gendered?

[Alicia_lynn419]

Good evening everyone....

After reading a few posts this evening, (and having seen my shrink this afternoon), a question occurred to me....

Is there a difference between, and how many of you feel, either "transgenderd" (being the opposite sex inside), or Bigendered, (feeling at times you possess qualities of both genders?

Perhaps transgender is a broader term to include many different points on the continuum, and I'm over-analyxing this.. but it was a thought that struck me... is there a difference?

Just playing Devil's Advocate here.....

[Dana]

Weather your a:

Heterosexual Crossdresser?
A Bi-sexual Crossdresseer?
A Homosexual Crossdresser?
A Asexual Crossdresser?

[dods460]

Actually now that you mention it, I do seem to think that their my be a difference. I would say that I am more trans due to the fact that I feel manly or girly on different days. excellent thought though

[RobertaFermina]

I'm Buy-Gendered...with enough perseverence, $$, and the right dress & accessories I can perfect the illusion and live the dream!

Roberta

[Tasha Meredith]

Bi-gendered for me. But I commonly present myself as trans-gendered as it gets the basic point across easy.

[loki_uk]

Definitely Bi-gendered even if more blokish than girly, and peversely I can be dressed all nilla and start acting girly before I realise it and have to keep a lid on it at work

I wouldn't be any happier actually being a woman as my bloke side would then get in the way and cause a lot of confusion rather than the other way round. I'm too much of an inbetweenie to be settled in either body

[CharleneCD]

Interesting thought. For me I would have to say bi-gendered as I have no desire to ever lose the male equipment. Also I have found that my guy side has become much more well adjusted since embracing and expressing the fem side.

Overall though I have to agree with the statement " does it really matter?". bi-gender and trans share too much in common.

[PaulaJaneThomas]

Transgender is the general cover-all term. I think bi-gender (or androgynous gender) would be a more accurate description for many trans people. I'm not convinced we need more labels though. Labels tend to divide. Trans people need to unite.

[Joy Carter]

I'm J--when dressed in drab and Joy when dressed in drag. So I think Transgendered suites me just fine.

[Kate Simmons]

I'm Me. No Bi's no tri's, just me.

[Marla S]

Interesting question.
Actually the term bigender probably fits better for CDs, because that's what most of us do.

For myself I lately came to the conclusion that this term "gender" is just too stretched and too vague meanwhile to be at all meaningful.
Instead of searching for new terms, that nobody understands, I rather define myself by my physical gender. That's male.
If I couldn't deal with that, I'd have to transition to become physical female.
On top of that physical gender is set a package of traits, desires, behaviors, and skills that are more feminine than usually found for men.
That's no problem, cause I can live any of it. Only the clothes thing, that also pronounces some of the feminine aspects and makes it easier to live them, makes a bit trouble. But I think that doesn't qualify me for a different gender.
Are rockers a differnt gender ?

(curious what I will say tomorrow, maybe the opposite )

[Tiffy]

You know what I find strange? Each time I settle into being ok with who and what I am someone want to redefine the terms. So they try to get you to think you are something else. When all in all the basics are the same. We are just different. Love it or hate, you can not change it.

Crossed up for life, Tiffany

[Julogden]

The transgender term is an all-inclusive umbrella term, bi-gender is one of the many categories included in transgender.

The term bi-gender has been around for quite a few years, I recall it being discussed a long time ago, not sure where it was, might have been by Virginia Prince in the old Transvestia magazine in the 1970's.

Carol

[Karren H]

They are just labels.... And you are what you are and you feel how you feel!! So knowing why and putting a label on it serves no purpose other than enriching shrinks... In my opinion!! Onnce you just accept who you are and what you like.... Then everything changes for the better... And our "hobby" become fun!!

I'd rather spend my money ON a new dress, than on someone who thinks he knows why I want a new dress!!! Hehehe

Love Karren

[Kieron Andrew]

They are just labels.... And you are what you are and you feel how you feel!! So knowing why and putting a label on it serves no purpose other than enriching shrinks... In my opinion!! Onnce you just accept who you are and what you like.... Then everything changes for the better... And our "hobby" become fun!!

I'd rather spend my money ON a new dress, than on someone who thinks he knows why I want a new dress!!! Hehehe

Love Karren

Labels are Versace, Gucci, Armani arent they?

[Karren H]

Labels are Versace, Gucci, Armani arent they?

Maybe in your wardrobe but not in mine!! Hehe. I thought they were those little sticky things you put on envelopes...



Karren

[maggie]

I am currently wrestling very hard with the question of what I am, what I can accept myself as, and how I should present myself to others. I fear that simply calling myself "transgender" is too broad a term, and it might confuse people into thinking that I want a sex change.

I currently think of myself more as "bi-gendered," since my self-expression can range all the way from feminine to aggressively macho. I have also seen the international diagnostic term "dual-role transvestite," which might fit, although I prefer the Native American idea of "two-spirit."

I have been working with a therapist for almost 4 years trying to integrate my male and female sides, but it doesn't seem to be working. Maggie and my male persona seem farther apart than ever. When I am out and about as Maggie for a few days in a row, I am so alive, happy, productive, and accepted as a woman that I have fantasies of transitioning and even getting SRS. I find it agonizing to transform back into my grumpy old man persona.

However, once I am male again, I view my Maggie escapades as having been ridiculous and the thought of transitioning repugnant and totally unrealistic. I long to be a normal, respected man and to date and become intimate with real genetic women. I try my best to expunge Maggie from my being, so she won't screw up my professional and social opportunities. Unfortunately, I end up hating myself, feeling confused, anxious, unable to focus my thoughts, and unable to work or to do anything productive.

While I am clinging to my male persona, I am unable to conceive how being Maggie could possibly help me feel better. However, every time I allow myself to turn back into Maggie, the transformative power is as overwhelming as ever. I become lively, happy, self-loving, clear-thinking, and able to work productively.

Right now I am forcing myself to endure a "de-toxicification" from CDing, to see if I can cope as a man. It's not going very well yet, and I still can't resist logging onto websites like this one.

As some of you will recall, the transgender issue caused my marriage to fall apart. Now I am living alone in an apartment, where I would have the opportunity to CD whenever I want. But I will soon be returning to my old neighborhood where my freedom will be restricted. I am also dating women.

I am looking for some term that would allow me to define and accept myself, and to get other people to accept me, honestly and as I am. Perhaps this is too much to hope for.

Maggie

[Karren H]

I am looking for some term that would allow me to define and accept myself, and to get other people to accept me, honestly and as I am. Perhaps this is too much to hope for.

Maggie

Maybe I over simplify things but I don't see how a "term" is going to solve anything..

To me it is simple... I totally accept that I love to crossdressing and going out enfemme... It makes me happy and I have know idea why! I don't care why!! If I knew why it wouldn't change a thing!! So its not worth the time and effort and expense to find out something that does not produce a result... Won't change how I feel.... And call it what you wish ... I'm going to keep doing it!!!

Love Karren

[Dawn D.]

Alicia, I was experiencing the same thoughts this morning and was wondering wether or not to post this same question. I'm happy that it has been. I am thinking that Bi-Gendered may be a more accurate term, for me at least. It seems to really define my state of mind. That I possess both qualities and desires of female and male persona. While not wanting to cross"trans"over entirely from one to another. This is just my thoughts about me. This, I feel, allows me to better explain to myself and others what this (to borrow a phrase) "Thing We Do" is all about. I want to make it clear though that I am not suggesting that others who CD are anything other than who they feel, believe and say they are!

Heres hoping every one of you have a GREAT DAY!

Dawn

[Kate Simmons]

I know what you mean Karren. Even though I enjoy being Rich, it just seems like the "thing to do" sometimes. I enjoy every minute of it in any case.

[Phoebe Reece]

Everyone is different. For me, transgender is an all encompassing term, much like T*, and meant to cover the entire spectrum of crossdressing activity. I think that those who desire to live their lives 24/7 in one particular gender do have a very different outlook on things from those that are happy to switch back and forth between the genders. Should there be different labels for those two ends of the spectrum? I don't know. Separate labels would probably confuse the uninformed even more than they are now.

[Alicia_lynn419]

Don't get me wrong.. i agree, regardless of what we call ourselves, it doesn't really matter... It was just a wild thought passing through my mind....

[Maggie Kay]

I think that Karren has a method that works because it accepts reality and avoids the black hole of trying to understand this aspect of ourselves. The key that I miss however is that I can't seem to get comfortable doing something I don't understand but am compelled to do. In some ways it is like sex. From an objective point of view, it seems like animal behavior not suited to sentient humans. However, it is wonderful pleasure and irresistible. Reasons to identify/emulate/become the opposite gender are many and come from deep within the psyche. So we are left with a dilemma, we are compelled do what society says is anathema. I can see why Karren punted and just does it. Perhaps in the end, there will be no answer and for some that is OK.

[Sweet Jane]

Hi

I feel completely monogendered. I am a man albeit a man who sometimes wears womens clothes. I still feel like a man when I'm dressed..yeah a man in a dress. I act no differently, and I do not alter how I relate sexually, just because I am dressed.
I do feel there are two "me's", apearance wise only...but only one "me" attitude and psychologically speaking. I really act and feel no different, nor do I wish to, when I'm dressed.......