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Thread: Is the mirror you're friend? FTM/MTF Question

  1. #1
    mod John's Avatar
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    Is the mirror you're friend? FTM/MTF Question

    I've never really caired what I look like, other than 'how high a shock factor can I manige?'. People told me I looked nice, or that I was good looking, and the best I could muster up was a sort of 'meh, whatever' feeling'. I'd know in abstrackt if I had a good outfit or such, buy my main thourght when looking in the mirror would be 'hm... do I need to henner my hair again' (or quite often 'I think ther mirror needs a wash').

    Anyway, since I've been dressing, that's all gone scewif. I'll wake up in the morning, and spend the first ten minuits lying in bed pondering what I'm going to wear. I actually cair. I'm losing the 'first cleen thing off the floor' thing (though not when I'm tired/hungover /rushing, which hapens a lot as a student. Hangovers, anyway ). I'll do more with my hair than run a brush through it, and make sure I'm wearing matching socs.

    I got started thinking on this as I'm geting ready to go out tonight. Went into the bathroom (to cleen teath) and for prety much the first time, genuinly liked what I sore in the mirror.

    Am I the exeption to the rules here (which I must admit, I'm good at), or is it a commen trend? Did you guys (or girls, you're imput's always welcome. But ftms or mtfs only on this one thanks) sudenly find you caired more what you looked like when you where presinting male?
    Mentaly unstable like a fox!

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  2. #2
    2ndCabinBoy/1stSkirtBoy Evert's Avatar
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    I do actually. I look in the mirror more often and take much more care of myself. It's a good thing and I hope I can keep up with it.
    I'm back! Shiver with fear!

  3. #3
    Swishy Pirate CaptLex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by John View Post
    Am I the exeption to the rules here (which I must admit, I'm good at), or is it a commen trend? Did you guys (or girls, you're imput's always welcome. But ftms or mtfs only on this one thanks) sudenly find you caired more what you looked like when you where presinting male?
    Oh yeah, absolutely, John! Once I started transitioning, even before I started to notice the little differences that T was producing, I became more concerned about my masculine appearance than I had ever been about my feminine appearance (although I don't really think I had a feminine appearance). I mean, as a female I still made sure I was presentable: clean hair, face, clothes, etc., but as a guy it's more than just being presentable - I want to look good! I don't obssess about it (I think), but I totally enjoy the whole process of making myself look as nice as possible: gelling my hair, shaving my face, using the aftershave, shining the shoes and putting a nice outfit together. Again, it's probably the frustrated GQ model in me.
    But why is the rum gone?! - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl[/SIZE]

    Why is the rum always gone? - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest[/SIZE]

    Why is all but the rum gone? No, the rum's gone too . . .
    - [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: At World End[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="3"]Lex on the Beach[/SIZE]. . . [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  4. #4
    sweet lil ' cookie Sierra Evon's Avatar
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    Exclamation Mirror

    I think you have to make a friend of the mirror , otherwise it can become an enemy to be feared
    " too young to fall in love " schoolgirl "

  5. #5
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    hated mirrors when very obviously female......but in male mode i will use em to style my hair or to see if my tie is straight....im getting better at making the mirror my friend

  6. #6
    Cabin boy/Purser :)
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    The Mirror eh?!....

    Hehe I think as a boy I'm pretty vain sometimes. Not because I think I'm good looking... but because I enjoy the sort of ("metrosexual"?) activities such as good grooming, using male products etc.
    I know if I transitioned I'd like..no...LOVE... looking in the mirror and seeing my stubble and male figure ... ahhhh
    It would be sort of.. satisfying... and like.. a relief.... I'm sure you understand.

    Right now though I just feel confused when I look in the mirror to be honest... I feel like this weird boy/girl hybrid. Like that androgynous frump thing... but sometimes it's more than that... like I feel like a boy but with these weird lumps on my body (curvy boobs and butt). It really upsets me actually.

    As a girl I don't like my figure. Never have, even when I was a bit slimmer.
    I just want to be straight up and down and stick thin like a model (this is possibly because of the longing to get rid of my curves). As a boy though I wouldn't mind even being a bit fat.

    Whenever anyone has ever praised how I look as a girl I have also been a bit "meh" and not really been able to say thank you or anything because I feel all funny about taking compliments. If someone says I look nice I used say "I don't." But since I realised that sounded ungrateful and rude I've altered it to "thank you very much but I don't think so." Type thing.
    If someone compliments me as a boy though.. I looove it

    The mirror isn't really my friend... but webcam is my friend haha! It's so much easier to pass on webcam sometimes
    I don't need advice on how to be a man. I just am one.

    www.dec.org.uk <-- in desperate need of our help.

    YO, yeh you! Please pray for &/or send your positive thoughts and love to Carol. And for Dominic, and Steve, and Karl. Miracles do happen, let's make them! Thank you kind person! And for Tristan's grandad to get better. & lovely Taylor. Pleease.

    PLEASE PRAY 4 CAROL'S LAST DAY OF RADIATION TREATMENT TO HAVE WORKED COMPLETELY EXCELLENTLY AND DESTROYED ALL THE BADNESS!! THANK YOU!

  7. #7
    Male ZenFrost's Avatar
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    Well, mirrors are good for making sure my tie isn't crooked or anything, but beyond that, I tend to avoid them.

  8. #8
    jasper happyfish's Avatar
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    I'm on pretty good terms with my mirror, actually. I make weird faces at it, and it makes weird faces back.

  9. #9
    In the middle bi_weird's Avatar
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    Haha I'm too lazy for that sort of thing. Occasionally to make sure my tie is straight. Sometimes I go through stretches where I admire my stomach or stand there loving how a new shirt makes me look boyish. Very seldom I'll enjoy the girl looking back at me. But when I'm actually in boy mode, not in "OMW I'M TRANS" mode, then I'm just as lazy as when I'm a girl.
    I wanna know, can you show me
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    Tell me more, please show me
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  10. #10
    Petite Member Laurie909's Avatar
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    Whenever anyone has ever praised how I look as a girl I have also been a bit "meh" and not really been able to say thank you or anything because I feel all funny about taking compliments. If someone says I look nice I used say "I don't." But since I realised that sounded ungrateful and rude I've altered it to "thank you very much but I don't think so." Type thing.
    If someone compliments me as a boy though.. I looove it
    Kind of funny but I feel the same way, but in reverse. I don't much care for compliments for my male-self. After all, I think sometimes people are just saying it to be polite. "You look nice" or "You look handsome" is mostly people just making coversation. I'm not Brad Pitt.....never have been and never will. On the other hand, compliments when I'm dressed as a woman are to be treasured! One time I went to a party with some friends. I was dressed as a woman and this woman (who was very pretty and a very fashionable dresser) said to me, "Looks like you're wearing some cute shoes." I went straight to heaven!

  11. #11
    Silver Member kerrianna's Avatar
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    It totally makes sense that when expressing that part of you that resonates you will want to spend more effort, and hence be more pleased with the result.

    Personally I'm not a big fan of mirrors. Although I remember spending time in front of them in my younger days trying to see just crazy I could make my eyes look. Scared myself.
    "I dwell in possibility."

    "Say what you want and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind, and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

    "I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
    George Bernard Shaw

  12. #12
    Living and Enjoying Life Kristen Kelly's Avatar
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    [SIZE="3"]The mirror is my friend lately, I like the changes I see. My GF says I take twice the care of myself in male mode than before she knew but I do look more Fememized in male mode than a year ago, and do like looking that way.[/SIZE]
    [SIZE="3"]Life Begins When You Stop Worrying What Other People Think[/SIZE]


    [SIZE="3"]
    Walk TALL SMILE and be CONFIDENT all will be OK
    [/SIZE]


    [SIZE="3"]It's Brave to be Different, Be Brave Too, Accept Me for Who I am ![/SIZE]

  13. #13
    The Nerdy One Lex's Avatar
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    The mirror is always my friend.
    Especially when I'm naked! I have such lovely, pale creamy skin, hahaha.

    Ahem. I don't dress as a girl unless it is forced upon me, and when it is, I don't care how I look and am generally grumpy. In guy clothes I care. Just that all my shades of black clothes are working nicely together, a nice pair of brightly coloured, striped or patterened knee-high socks, if my hair looks alright, that sort of thing. Nothing time consuming.

    And like I said before, the mirror is always my friend, I am a sexy beast, rawr. xD
    Come on goats, time to go home!

  14. #14
    In the middle bi_weird's Avatar
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    NAKED LEX!

    Mmm so I just realized that the mirror is an interesting sort of friend. I was getting dressed in the bathroom (hehe naked me) and put on my boy pants and my sports bra. At that point I looked at myself, and if not completely male, I looked completely me. Those two articles of clothing seemed to me to be very fitting for who I am, and they gave an effect I can like. I don't know if I've ever felt more completely genderless than I do right now, but it's a nice feeling.
    I wanna know, can you show me
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    Somethings familiar about these strangers like me

  15. #15
    Cabin boy/Purser :)
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    NAKED BI!

    Wow that's really good Bi.

    When I see those 2 items on me together I feel in conflict.
    I am sooo happy that you are like... er... you know... (sorry.. bit dim today... whats the word? Ah yes...) ....confident in you and know who you are!
    I don't need advice on how to be a man. I just am one.

    www.dec.org.uk <-- in desperate need of our help.

    YO, yeh you! Please pray for &/or send your positive thoughts and love to Carol. And for Dominic, and Steve, and Karl. Miracles do happen, let's make them! Thank you kind person! And for Tristan's grandad to get better. & lovely Taylor. Pleease.

    PLEASE PRAY 4 CAROL'S LAST DAY OF RADIATION TREATMENT TO HAVE WORKED COMPLETELY EXCELLENTLY AND DESTROYED ALL THE BADNESS!! THANK YOU!

  16. #16
    Senior Member Felix's Avatar
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    Yeah I generally like the mirror cos it helps me to get things right when I'm trying to look as male as possible. I think I'm becoming very aware of how I look with regards to clothing. I prefere my shirts and trousers for work as I feel smarter all round than when I wear my sports gear. I've always tried to watch my appearance cos I like to look good for Yachica so she is proud of me ya know. Plus I like to look good for me so I feel good. Couldn't manage without a mirroe most definitely it keeps me in check xx Felix :RND1:
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Me, Myself and Felix!!

  17. #17
    Dr House Rule's Adam's Avatar
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    i was not gonna answer this one because it would come aross sad but yeah before i came out i avoded mirrors at all cost i hated my reflection big time but since i have been presenting as male i cant leave it alone when i say it let me explain:

    at the bottom of our stairs is a full length mirror before i came out and actully took control of my life and future i used to run down the stairs passed it with out looking now though it can take upto 10 mins to get down stairs i seem to check in shirts not showing anything it shouldent i then check my hair i stand there thinking yeah im a handsome git!! each day i get more pleased with who is faceing me in the mirror everyday its more me the person i want to see in that mirror instead of what i used to see a person that was me but i did not feel reflected the truwe inner me.

    hay i hope that made sence

    :RND2:

  18. #18
    Silver Member kerrianna's Avatar
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    Oh Adam, that didn't make me sad at all!

    It did make me misty eyed, tears of joy for you. I hope it just keeps getting better and better.
    "I dwell in possibility."

    "Say what you want and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind, and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

    "I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
    George Bernard Shaw

  19. #19
    Swishy Pirate CaptLex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam View Post
    each day i get more pleased with who is faceing me in the mirror everyday its more me the person i want to see in that mirror instead of what i used to see a person that was me but i did not feel reflected the truwe inner me.
    I agree with Kerrianna, Adam, it's not sad - your story has a happy ending.
    But why is the rum gone?! - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl[/SIZE]

    Why is the rum always gone? - Capt. Jack Sparrow [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest[/SIZE]

    Why is all but the rum gone? No, the rum's gone too . . .
    - [SIZE="1"]Pirates of the Caribbean: At World End[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="3"]Lex on the Beach[/SIZE]. . . [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  20. #20
    Michelleupnorth michelleupnorth's Avatar
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    I hate the mirror. What I see is not me when I have to shave. I'd rather avoid it all together when I'm a man. I don't care for it much when I start putting make-up on but after a while once the face starts to look more feminine I don't mind it as much and actually enjoy looking at myself.

  21. #21
    I'm just me Siobhan Marie's Avatar
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    Smile

    [SIZE="3"]Me and my mirror don't exactly get on either. I know what and who I am but I just don't see it in the mirror. I want to see Anna in the mirror and don't. Instead I see Bruce which is not nice. And as for me naked, a piece of friendly Anna's advice, don't go there it's horrible.

    Anna Marie x
    [/SIZE]
    [SIZE="3"]I need to be on the outside, who I am on the inside[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="3"]Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know[/SIZE]

  22. #22
    Platinum Member Barb Valentine's Avatar
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    I have to say yes I like what I see in the mirror some times
    It's the camera I hate
    I just don't have fun -- I make the fun

    Life's too short........Enjoy every day

  23. #23
    Member jsoto81's Avatar
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    Now that I'm moving more towards transitioning I take greater care in my appearance. I use face scrubs and toners and lotion so my face doesn't dry out. (thank you queer eye). I care more about my clothes.

    I've noticed I don't stare at the mirror but I don't shun away from them like I use to. The binders have really boosted my self confidence.
    Ben

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