Purging

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

I really dont understand alot about this subject "Purging" , from what iam aware of, is it when you decicde to quit the c/d for awhile and get rid of your clothes etc ?? & if iam right with it, how does that feel to do that ??
Is it something that affects you a great deal, because your stopping because you have to or does it affect you because there are times when you just feel like it "needs to go away for awhile" & when you do purge , do you completley get rid ? or put it away for awhile , from when you feel the need to c/d again

[Dixie]

[SIZE="3"]When I purged it was out of guilt, and it was an "everything must go!!" type of affair.[/SIZE]

[Staci G]

For me it is a feeling of guilt and condemnation coming from within not without. Although I am married to a intolerant woman she does not know about my "stash" so can't tell me to get rid of it.. To purge is to throw it all out and get it it out of my sight I will never wear another panty or stocking again. It always comes back though even stronger than before, I wish I had all the things I have "purged" I could fill a walk in closet with the dresses alone. I hope this answers your question I can only answer for me there may be others that are different..

[Kate Simmons]

Yeah, I've done it a couple of times Angie but finally learned to use it to my advantage. I've "purged" that word from my TG vocabulary and now the only "purging" I do is when I don't feel well. Nothing left to purge really, it's all me either way.

[Stormgirl]

[SIZE="3"]When I purged it was out of guilt, and it was an "everything must go!!" type of affair.[/SIZE]

x2

my sentiments exactly

OP,I love Taz!

[Jenna1561]

I've only truly purged twice. I don't count the numerous times when I was young and tossed out the 3 or 4 things I had to keep my parents from discovering them - paranoia parentus - or something like that, lol.

I purged once just before I married; getting rid of several pieces of clothing, shoes and a limited amount of makeup. And then again just after the birth of my 4th child, again clothes, shoes, purse, makeup - everything I had.

I agree with Dixie, both times it was out of guilt and a desire to try to stop. But I couldn't. That last time was almost 14 years ago.

You should see my closet now - 3:1 women's to men's. And let's not talk about shoes. Well, O.K., since you're forcing me. I have 3 pair of men's shoes, 1 pair hiking boots (unisex really), and 1 pair of snow boots. I just counted and not including flip flops & slippers, I have 22 pair of women's shoes including sandals, pumps, flats, ballets, and tennis shoes and 4 pair women's boots!

If I purged now it would simply kill me emotionally. I, like most everyone else, have tossed some things that I wish I hadn't. Next time I thin out my wardrobe, I think I'll try ebaying.

I know I wandered off-topic, sorry about that. But for me the purges were an attempt to disassociate myself from the behavior, again mostly out of guilt and shame. But I'm well over that now.


Jenna

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

Thank you for telling me what it meant i sort of twigged , but i wanted as well to ask @ same time how it felt when you did purge which you are kindley doing as well ty

[Lissa Stevens]

For me it was guilt and shame that caused me to purge. I would get rid of everything, and that was it! I would never crossdress again. Of course, anywhere from a few weeks to a few months that old urge would hit again and I would start over. I have not purged in over 15 years now and I think I know why. In my early days, like a lot of others it seems, my CDing was at least partially sexual. These days it has nothing to do with sex but with gender identity. When I was younger I had these two things confused. I would be afraid I was "gay" or I was a weirdo. Now I know it has nothing to do with that. I still have some issues but some things are cleared up in my messed up mind.

[Dixie]

[SIZE="3"]It's funny, but I felt guilty that's why I purged, but after purging I felt guilty for purging.[/SIZE]

[RachelDenise]

When I purged, it was driven by guilt. Now when I get rid of something, it's because it is too old, doesn't fit, or torn!

[Rita B]

I could open my own boutique with everything that I have purged over the years. All I know is there are people out there who must have gotten hold of a lot of neat things because I used to buy nothing but the best. Will not do it anymore unless it is something that I know I will never wear again or just don't like it. I notice that "purging" is really a female trait too. I see my wife going trough the process many times for different reasons I am sure. Women tend to buy a lot of things on impulse which they will never wear and let hang in their closets forever. Men are a lot more sane when it comes to buying clothes ( especially us older guys). You only replace clothes when the ones you have on your back fall off. . .or your wife refuses to wash them anymore. . .haha

[Daintre]

I have purged 3 times now, it was a decision made out of guilt, it was complete and on the one hand I felt good that I was doing this, but deeper inside I knew that I was only hurting myself.

Today because I am moving I find myself in the purge mode again...I find that I need to dispose of a lot of Jennie's things, I am not liking it but it has to be done.

[battybattybats]

Indeed. In my teens I got annoyed with my preocupations. It felt good at the time, I would be strong, I would be in control of myself etc... It came from fear, from guilt, from denial of natural desires. Eventually the desires crept back and I really regreted throwing out those stockings. In the end all I had done was put myself through frustration and pain.

When my GF decided she couldn't handle the possibility when I told her my desires had returned (I thought they might go away now she was in my life but I still had the decency to tell her I'd done it in the past and might want to again in the future before we got serious) and asked me (well demanded) to stop I refused to throw the few things I had away. Instead they went into a box. I only came to an understanding of how important this part of me was to me when it was denied me.

[Paulacder]

Purging has a definate up side. It allows you to discard all your fem. attire then at some point and time you can re outfit your wardrobe with later and more trendy fashons. The downside it's very expensive. Beleive me it happens.

[Leah B]

I was fortunate to have an understanding mother. I've never purged, and I've sworn that I never will.

[Rachel Morley]

I've only purged twice in my life and the last time was about 10 years ago. Mine was all about feeling wracked with guilt and hating my myself for not being "normal". I told myself that I should not be "fanning the flames" and that what I am doing is not "normal for a guy" and (I was single at the time) if I was to find a girlfriend I'd have to stop all this and "become a man". Funny thing was .... I found my dream woman, (now my wife) Marla on a crossdressing forum Weird huh?

[LindaTS]

Although I discovered myself at an early age of about 6 I've never purged. I think I can understand why it happens to some of the girls but thank God I've never felt the need to do it. I can just imagine how a guilt trip could lead to doing it but at least it seems not to last forever. Welcome back to all the girls who have purged.

[Karren H]

I've only purged a few times anf they were smallish... And it was because I didn't understand why I was doing what I was doing... Still don't understand why and don't care why... (Don't get me going on that....).! B.

That was then and this is now and there will be no more purges in my future.... Small wardrobe reductions from time to time..... So I can support my main adiction....... Shopping for Womens Clothes!! Lol


Karren

[Emily Ann Brown]

First 2 purges were small ones, and it was as mentioned guilt driven. Third time was WIFE driven (I could have said no of course) and was like 60% of wardrobe. NO, she didn't know there was 40% she missed. All three times I felt better for about a day. Felt I had taken charge, stopped being a pervert, claimed my manhood back. Then Em came back to call and OMGosh what have I done. Like Karren....isn't happening again (divorce eliminating the need and guilt).


Emily Ann

[Lovely Rita]

I really dont understand alot about this subject "Purging" , from what iam aware of, is it when you decicde to quit the c/d for awhile and get rid of your clothes etc ?? & if iam right with it, how does that feel to do that ??
Is it something that affects you a great deal, because your stopping because you have to or does it affect you because there are times when you just feel like it "needs to go away for awhile" & when you do purge , do you completley get rid ? or put it away for awhile , from when you feel the need to c/d again

I purged in the past because I had decided never to CD again. It was a decision that I took because I was saying goodbye to cding forever. I never did it to just take a break, too expensive. I now regret the times I did purge because I will never be able to replace many of the shoes and dresses.

I still think back to some of the shoes and can almost cry.

Today, I embrace my cding and accept it fully. If I need a break I will just take a break from it, but the clothes are precious booty for me. I think back at all the unopened packages of hosiery I threw away and..........oh well let me stop thinking about it.

[Tina B.]

Very young the first time, guilt and shame, and all that. Second time, meet a woman and wanted to be the man I knew I should be, so out it all went. Yes it felt good to take charge, and not give into feelings that where not NORMAL, but then one day you wake up, and relize you are not normal, and now I don't even want to be. Buying all new is fun, but I do miss a great pair of pumps that I had, and have never been able to find a pair that nice again.
And I have promised myself, the last purge, was the last purge, even things that don't fit, get packed away, just in case I loss the weight, and can get back into them again!
Tina B.

[Denielleinheels]

I have done it a few times in my life. I felt like a freak.. I felt like I had to make it stop. The end result was the need coming back even stronger so now I don't fight it, I go with it.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

Thats intresting to read , in some ways it strikes me as if the "purging" was a easier way to get rid of what you were doing ( if you felt uncomfortable/unhappy @ the time ) if the clothes werent there !! then the c/d carnt be type thing
thank you again for all your replies

[terri jane]

I have recently purged in respect of wife's desires that I stop. i will honor her request to not wear her things vut the one thing I cannot purge is the desire. I am 59 and it never leaves and I hope I can someday be true to my calling. now that I am out to wife dont know if I can eever own a stash again but do i miss it. Terri

[Maggie Kay]

I purged two times as well. Both times were massive purges and led to crippling depression. The second was an ultimatum from my wife. It went on to a several month long depression and ability to work also suffered. When it became obvious that for practical reasons I had to get stuff back, we had very little money to spend on things. So instead of Chantelle, I have Costco specials. I threw out several thousand dollars worth of nearly new lingerie. Two huge garbage bags full. I still pine for those clothes. I learned that there is no way to get rid of CD for me. Then again, I now accept that I am TG and into transition now.