oh those US army boys

[Kieron Andrew]

Let me be the first to say i am so glad this it a non issue.


SarahLynn

not quite the first lol

[vbcdgrl]

MJ, I think you should find some way to end the on line acquintance without telling him you're a TS. It's unlikely the soldier will accept you as a TS, and dragging this relationship out is not fair to him.

Vikki

[Tamara Croft]

MJ, I think you should find some way to end the on line acquintance without telling him you're a TS. It's unlikely the soldier will accept you as a TS, and dragging this relationship out is not fair to him.

Vikki

I think you should try reading this: -

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...1&postcount=48

[diane59]

Good for you MJ, I think you found a TRUE friend!

[Sharon]

Very cool, MJ!! He not only knows, but doesn't care!!

Now then -- go for it!

[kerrianna]

I'm happy for you MJ that you can carry on this friendship without feeling guilty.

He obviously likes you as a person and a friend and let's face it, you are an attractive woman.

I'm glad you came here with your problem because it does raise for the rest of us the issue of honesty online. I know IDing one way and being physically another creates a moral dilemma when making online friends, because online you can present as your true self, but you know there's a RL complication.

I'm glad your soldier boy is cool with that. Some people actually 'get it'.

And who cares if you're old enough to be his mother?

Go get 'im cougar!

[MJ]

thank you all. now i just have to make sure he is in the us army and over in Iraq .. the best way thanks to Veronica Kate is to send him a care package so i need an address and if Veronica can validate it's true then i will send him a package he he , sneaky little devils ant we and the fun will begin what to put in the care package
he had CD friends ?

my Mommy use to say show me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are

say no more

[Kieron Andrew]

thank you all. now i just have to make sure he is in the us army and over in Iraq .. the best way thanks to Veronica Kate is to send him a care package so i need an address and if Veronica can validate it's true then i will send him a package he he , sneaky little devils ant we and the fun will begin what to put in the care package
he had CD friends ?

my Mommy use to say show me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are

say no more

mj..... care packages ideas

http://www.cafepress.com/lovethetroops/491788

http://www.geocities.com/militarycarepackage/ - click on the hearts for ideas

http://www.operationmilitarypride.org/packages.html - restrictions

http://www.brandonblog.com/A_Soldier..._Packages.html - list of ideas

that first link is really good

[MJ]

wow Kieron you truly are a gold mine of information thank you

[Holly]

MJ, I'm really happy for you. It just proves that honesty IS the best policy. Now you have absolute certainty that this young soldier like YOU for who you are. That has got to be the best feeling!

[ShortSkirt]

so do i tell or not !!! .

I normally make that clear in the first 2 or 3 minutes of an online chat with....anyone, and I think you should to.

[Pink Person]

Hi MJ,

I am glad that he knows and is not upset but that doesn't excuse your willingness to deceive a soldier in a war-zone (or someone you believed to be a soldier). The potential for causing unnecessary (and dangerous) emotional harm to him in the scenario you described was high, and it was wrong for you to risk it. I would urge you not to do it again and hope you won't. There are plenty of unsuspecting civilians that you can fool for much lower stakes if you must. I'm sorry but I just don't agree that what you did was right.

Pink

[MJ]

hi pink
just for the record here he found me... and he knew i was a ts he did not say anything to me during our first contact .. and as this web site is for help and support i wanted help and advice .... its OK for our sisters to ask about there girlfriends ... but when i need help with a guy friend i get flack ? ... my 360 is very clear and Evan has me as my old self in drab i have nothing to hide it's all there .. we had a chat he is OK with me ... and a gentleman .. and we shall see were this goes .. we may never meet and thats fine he just wants to talk and i told him i am here for him ...

i don't feel that i should scream from the mountain top i am a transsexual every time i meet someone ... have some compassion for what we go through it one thing to play dress up but in the real world you got to live and pass as a woman or die

[Tamara Croft]

Hi MJ,

I am glad that he knows and is not upset but that doesn't excuse your willingness to deceive a soldier in a war-zone (or someone you believed to be a soldier). The potential for causing unnecessary (and dangerous) emotional harm to him in the scenario you described was high, and it was wrong for you to risk it. I would urge you not to do it again and hope you won't. There are plenty of unsuspecting civilians that you can fool for much lower stakes if you must. I'm sorry but I just don't agree that what you did was right.

Pink

Sorry, but what has him being a soldier got to do with anything? I think your post is a huge over reaction. MJ did nothing wrong at all, the guy already knew she was a TS, he just never mentioned it, the same could be said about him couldn't it? You can get off your high horse now, before you fall off it!!!!

[Pink Person]

Hi Tamara and MJ,

Pardon me, but MJ's original post indicates that she believed that the man didn't know she was TS and that she didn't want to tell him. The fact that everything worked out for her doesn't excuse her willingness to not be honest with him. If you want support for her behavior then you won't get it from me. I gave advice that was similar to what was offered by other people.

I am willing to concede that it doesn't matter whether the man is a soldier or not when it comes to the question of whether someone who doesn't know the truth should be told (although several other posts don't agree with your perspective on this point). No man should be led to believe or let to believe that a TS woman is not a TS woman. I stand by my response.

Pink

[TG-Taru]

Pink,

the point many of were making is,
as long as it doesn't matter and it's clear it's not going to either (never going to get together, dream of having non-adopted kids together etc.) it doesn't matter if a woman is a TS woman or a GG woman. We're still talking of women, whatever genetics they have or original body they had, different from men who crossdress. They aren't lying about being women. A TS will likely be somewhat different from average GG, but mostly well within natural variance of GGs. Medical history or completeness of body functions not being of importance, in this situation, there is no reason to have to bring it up. If the situation changes and it becomes relevant, then it's time to tell.

It's the same difference as being friends with a woman who has had hysterectomy or planning a family rogether. For being friends it just doesn't matter, and she has no obligation to tell. Whatever it is you're keeping to yourself and not telling, as long as it won't affect the other, it's your rightful choice to decide whether to tell or not.

[Pink Person]

This post is for girls who just want to have fun. On the subject of the carefree hijinks that can ensue when “army boys” become involved with TS women, see the real life story of Barry Winchell and Calpernia Addams as depicted in the lighthearted movie titled Soldier’s Girl. For more comedy relief, on the related subject of how males react to TS women who fool them, see the real life story of Gwen Araujo as depicted in the movie A Girl Like Me: The Gwen Araujo Story. The homosexual panic defense used by the people who killed Gwen is “hilariously” false to everyone but the ones who asserted it. As these stories indicate, we should never overreact to the possibility that men will be emotionally disturbed by TS women who become involved with them under false pretenses or worry about how other people will react to their relationships with TS women. There is absolutely no evidence that anything bad will come from the harmless pursuit of our own personal pleasure. I’m sure that everyone involved with the two stories above would agree, especially the dead ones (if only they could talk).

Obtuse readers of this post should ask a friend to help them identify the irony that I am using to make a point that should be obvious to all of us. We should all proceed with honesty, consideration, and caution in our relationships with the opposite sex.

Pink

[MJ]

hi pink
QUOTE :- We should all proceed with honesty, consideration, and caution in our relationships with the opposite sex.

you are so right . but he is a pen pal ..not a lover .. he could be my son so now we are friends he knows and don't care .. i understand what you are saying but the real life test is to live and pass yourself off as a woman ..
now i can't do that if i tell everyone hi i was born a guy .. and if i ever get to date it will be with someone i know well and they know me ... you see The Gwen Araujo Story.
is different you see she had sex with a guy and did not tell him up front and Gwen's ex-girlfriend got Evan and told on Gwen ...now she is dead sad..

and there will come a day when i will not say anything to anyone about my past the past is history i just want to be me whatever little time i have left

[JoAnnDallas]

Last year, I too was contacted by a soilder in Iraq via email. He said he had seen my yahoo profile, saw I was in Dallas, and that he too was CD. We kept up the emails and when he returned, we meet at HEF last year. It was really great to meet him after talking back and forth for about 3 months. He is currently back in Iraq for another tour, but we have not talked since he went back.

[Angie G]

Jecqui has a good point he don't need this kind of distraction wher being shot at
Angie

[TracyH]

First off, from the first page, I came to the conclusion that he knew. Contrary to popular belief, stupid people do not do well or last long in the military. I came to the conclusion pretty quickly that he'd checked your profile and already knew, and was open minded enough to not make a big deal about it. I was delighted to find out by the second page that that was the case.

Second, this is exactly what profiles are for. It's pretty much common knowlege these days that you can be anyone you want on the internet, and I can't really sympathize with someone who's "been tricked"

But all in all, these guys and girls really need people to talk to. Life in a war zone is strange, your family panics every time they hear about a roadside bomb going off and eagerly await your next email or phone call, but the most interesting thing you have to tell them is that the chow hall now has chocolate chip muffins. It's really hard to just "bs" because the people who care about you are so worried all the time. It's really emotionally draining because you really do have to calm your family down every time you talk to them.

Another thing is that the first mortar attack brings you to terms with your own mortality pretty quickly. You panic and pray during the first one, or maybe two, but after that, you calmly understand that this could be the one that kills me. After about the 80th, you realize, Life is way too short for this crap, when I get home I'm going to live my life the way I want to. For some of us, that means buying a sailboat. For others it means wearing a dress to the mall. Or even starting an online relationship with a charming TS lady.

[Kieron Andrew]

Jecqui has a good point he don't need this kind of distraction wher being shot at
Angie

Hi angie, did you not read mj's recent posts? he knows and is ok with it

[MJ]

i just want you all to know we had a chat i wanted to be sure and he is OK with me and he wanted pictures nothing naked " he said that " i sent him some and all he could say was WOW ... you got it going on " what does that mean " anyway he is kind ask 101 questions about me and we just talk about home the USA and Canada .. it help to have someone to talk to i don't doubt he is in the military anymore and i am proud to say i have a friend in the us army and he respect me for who i am how cool is that

[Sandra]

MJ

All I can say is good for you girl.

[Siobhan Marie]

[SIZE="3"]Marissa, I'm so pleased that you've found a friend who accepts you for who you are. I just hope that I can.

Anna x[/SIZE]