An "Ugly" Incident

[JessiRed]

So, long story short, while I was on vacation last week my SO's sisters boyfriend decided to snoop around on my computer and found my "girlie" pics and decided to confront my SO about it. I happened to overhear what was said and he told her that he found the pictures and that I was "A very ugly woman". He apparently was trying to "out" me to my SO, which is laughable, she is a VERY supportive SO. Upon hearing this I went inside and told him to "**** off and never come back". I have been a mess since then, I almost feel violated and it is one of my worst fears come true. I know better than to let this rule my life but it's hard. What should I do? Nothing? Should I let him back into my home? Am I overreacting? I feel lost...

[Sharon]

He was attempting to out you! F him.

[Frankie-Dear]

Your worst fear.... Wow! Congratulations!! The very thing you were most afraid of has happened, and you're still alive, and life is still going on, and it's no problem to your SO, so you're over the hump! Now you can be fearless! How cool is THAT?? He inadvertantly did you a favor.

Good for you for booting his azz out, though. What a sleazy thing for him to have done.

And just for the record: You are NOT an ugly woman. Not at ALL.

[MJ]

just for the record i think you look great. i guess you are out to the family now .. hold your head up high girl.. and i think it's time to add a log in to your computer so this won't happen again

[aka.laura]

Tough. But you did the right thing! AND survived! What's the worst thing that could happen now? Think about it and prepare yourself. BTW: no password on your PC? uups. And I think you look good too!

[Karren H]

Ouch!!!

I'd say we hunt him down, dress him up like a woman and drop him off at the mall...... Hmmmm. Doesn't seem like punishment to me!!! Never mind......

I'd never let him into the house.. Or talk to him.. EVER!!!

Karren

[Sandra]

Hmm snooping and trying to out you, you did the right thing by getting him out of the house and if it was me I wouldn't ever let him back in.

[Marla S]

You could try to be cool.
Say sorry that you have thrown him out, but that he might better consult a shrink.
In contrast to CDing, spying others computers and to tattle harms others. This is lowest level. At least he should have talked to you first.

[Dixie]

[SIZE="3"]I think he has some nerve snooping on someone else's computer, I would not let him back into my home ever again, who knows where else he'll snoop and what he may be capable of ie theft.
What an A**HOLE!!![/SIZE]

[JessiRed]

Well thanks so much for the kind words ladies, you are all beautiful!

Sharon- F'ing right on

Frankie- It may not have been my WORST fear (that would be the guys in my band finding out-which this guy knowing creates that possibility) but it def. ranked right up there. He did this in the middle of a party we were having and I was terrified he was going to make a scene.

MJ- Funny enough I am already out to my family, and yes you're right about the login, woops

Peach- Thank You

Karren- You are so funny, I love the way you look at things, I could learn a few things from you

Sandra- Yeah, he's never coming over again, too bad he'll miss all the pool parties this summer, hehe

BTW, he tried to tell my SO that he thought it was just from a costume party or something but he is full of it.

[Chantelle CD]

I like to try to live by a golden rule, and that is to only let into my life that witch is conducive to happiness, forgive the person, but that doesn't mean you have to let negative into your life, I just hope he is not the type to blab to everyone you know!

[chucks]

some people are assholes and some will never change but it is best to forgive anyway and be humble.

[Amy Hepker]

Well,
I guess the word is out. Just how far will he take it and if your friends find out what will they do??? Will they believe you or him?? Does it really matter?? You may lose friends and you may find out who your true friends are. I told a very male friend of mine that I was a Crossdresser years ago and he never cut me down or banned me, as a matter of fact he is still one of my best friends. No he is not gay and has never even thought of crossdressing, but he is a very good friend. I am just wondering what your SO said to him about it. I went out on a Halloween one time with my now Xwife and a friend of hers for breakfast and some guy said that I was one ugly chick, my not so supportive Xwife turned around and made comments to him backing me. I was surprised by her remarks even though my dressing was not good as far as she was concerned.
I would just go with the flow. You may want to let people hear it from you before they hear it from him. Tell then what he did, they maybe on your side just because what he did was wrong.

[Shelly Preston]

As much as I think you should not let him near your house ever again

I can see why you ask it may cause some friction between the sisters

There may be family get togethers and he may or may not be part of the family in the future

Should this be the case then make it quite clear he has to respect how you choose to live you live and its not up for discussion

[bobi jean]

Your SO's, sisters boyfriend? What the f**k was he doing on your computer in the first place? without permission I presume!!! never back in the house, no-one needs that type of person around. Ok now for your "apology" to him, for over reacting. NEVER MIND!!!!!!!!!!
BEST TO LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE.... Chances are he is going to tell some of his closest friends, and at some time you may have to deal with that situation, but if you just wait to see if he does or not , it may just pass over..
A VERY UGLY WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT AN AROGANT ASS, WHERE DOES HE GET OFF TALKING ABOUT SOMEONE/ANYONE LIKE THAT

Lets Use Karrens Idea About Dressing Him Up, But Lets Take Pictures first, Post Them On The Internet, Then Drop Him Of At A back roads truck-stop Some Where

[JessiRed]

Lets Use Karrens Idea About Dressing Him Up, But Lets Take Pictures first, Post Them On The Internet, Then Drop Him Of At A back roads truck-stop Some Where

I like this idea...

[Joy Carter]

Ouch!!!

I'd say we hunt him down, dress him up like a woman and drop him off at the mall...... Hmmmm. Doesn't seem like punishment to me!!! Never mind......

I'd never let him into the house.. Or talk to him.. EVER!!!

Karren

A lumberjack convention would be better. I hear they get pretty lonely up in those camps.

[bobi jean]

JessiRed
Whenever you are ready
Bobi

[Di]

What a sleaze. You lived through it and if you can I would NEVER let him near you again.......................BUT in family situations this isn't always possible...if you end up around him because of have to situations...never trust him again.

[SherriePall]

First -- I think you look very good.
Second -- If he approaches you again, tell him that if you don't hear another word about it from him, you may not call the police for trespassing or whatever may hold up in small claims court.

[JoAnnDallas]

A truck stop is not good enough. Get him all dressed up and drop him off at a Adult Book Store and then lock the doors with him and all the customers.

[Frankie-Dear]

Dress him up. BADLY!

[Bobbi Lynn]

I was thinking "Photo-shop" his head onto some "girly" pictures and put those on the web!! Passwords for your computer, though as others have said, he should not have been using your computer anyway.

[Gina_darling]

I am natuarlly a forgiving person, but what he did was wrong, he violated your privacy and then tried to make out you were wrong and out you behind your back! Dispicable! I would demand an apology, and if one is not forthcoming your SO should suggest to her sister that the guy be given the boot!

[Dasein9]

I wouldn't have him in my home again.

I'd also mention something to the bandmates. If it were along the lines of, "This guy went snooping on my computer, saw some pictures, and drew his own conclusions." then you're neither lying nor coming out, but if you say it before he speaks to any of them, then they're most likely to believe you.