Y'all are much too kind. If I would have caught him, I'd be dunking his head in the toilet so he could bob for brown trout. :mad:
Y'all are much too kind. If I would have caught him, I'd be dunking his head in the toilet so he could bob for brown trout. :mad:
-Frankie
Any path of value will point the way within.
So many worlds, so little time...
iNFj
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Eckankar
One of my favorite movies is Maximum Overdrive. Way to steamroll over that creep. He's lucky you didn't knock his block off.
Bottom line issue here to me really isn't that he attempted to out you. What is most bothersome to me is that he violated your privacy by poking into things he should not have been into. That's none of his damn business. I would NOT invite him back into my household until he agreed to abide by common, basic, respect and decency with not violating other people's rights.Originally Posted by JessiRed
What a jerk
Keep him out he will never be a friend or someone you can trust. Don't let him back in
Angie
Hi Everyone: Dear Jessi IMHO your GG SO sister's "friend" is a coward and a person of low character. Should your SIL decide to marry the jerk then U might have to "see" this cretin occasionally, but stick to your guns and don't let that trash ever into your home.
If the worst case scenario happens and U end up being related to him. Offer him an opportunity to apologize, after all it says in the Bible to forgive as we R forgiven. Other than that my guess is your SIL will also see he is lacking in character and jet the jerk.
Take some fake Holloween pix where you look like you did a really bad job crossdressing. Then, if it comes up, you show your friends these pix, and say, "Oh, you mean THESE dumb photos". And tell them he's freakin' out over nothing and must be seriously homophobic if your cartoonish attempt at Holloween creeps him out.
I volunteer to flog him
[SIZE="4"][/SIZE]
You were right to throw him out. He had no business using your computer, let alone snooping on it. That's just wrong!
Perhaps your SO should talk with her sister, since she should also share at least some of the blame for letting the boyfriend mess around with your computer.
And, for heaven's sake, at least password protect the pictures, if not the entire computer.
Last edited by Rebecca-L; 06-18-2007 at 05:55 PM. Reason: Spelling
Rebecca
Thinking about this later, I'm finding myself very amused that he felt it important to comment about how attractive he found you as a woman.
Hmmmm...
Maybe he's just pulling the typical male chauvinist thing, wherein a woman's existence only matters insofar as her attractiveness to him is concerned.
Or maybe he was aroused...
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
I agree that he should be 'disinvited' from your home. BUT if there is any chance that he and your wife's sister end up being together permanently, I'd hate to see this cause a rift that keeps your wife and her sister apart.
I think that along with making him no longer welcome in your home, you could also let it be known that if he could ever HONESTLY come back to you, apologize for his actions and admit that he was wrong, then you might, some day, be able to forgive him. This puts the ball in HIS court and also lets you know that as far as you are concerned, he was 100% in the wrong, not you.
As it is now, he might still even believe that you are keeping him away out of shame or guilt. If you ask for an apology, it puts you back in the driver's seat again.
In a society in which it is a moral offense to be different from your neighbor your only escape is never to let them find out.
-- Robert Heinlein
Hey JessiRed - I can totally relate.
Some years ago, summertime, my wife and I went to Central America for a three week vacation. Meanwhile, my car (1995 Mustang GT) was in our garage, all by itself.
So we get back from the vacation and I notice several deep gauges on the side of my car. Turns out that my wife's nephew's girlfriend took it upon herself to park in the garage (without our knowledge or permission), and everytime she got out of her car, WHAM, into my car with her door.
Well, after talking with the police and spending a very difficult week with the wife, I ended up letting it drop. After a few years, I eventually forgave her, but I never did forget.
My final analysis of the situation was that she would never change her attitude, and the only thing that saved my marriage (and my sanity) was that they eventually split up, and we never saw her again.
True story.
Personally I am convinced that some people never change, and every once in a while it is necessary to effectuate change by your own efforts.
Granted, it is not easy.
My own experience. YMMV.
Good luck sorting it out.
p.s. I also agree with the others - you are attractive in girl mode.
Don't rule out that either!
Sherry
Last edited by gmss; 06-18-2007 at 06:30 PM.
I think he likes you!
Fulltime girl on the inside.
Lipstick=confidence
[SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE]
Privacy...
Unfortunately people like him are far more common than we would like to think. To some people an unsecured computer is an outright invitation to snoop. If you are prone to leaving your computer powered on at all times you need to log off when you are done and use a password on your account. It would also be wise to set your screen saver to start after a short period of time and require the same password to get back to the desktop. You never know when a short interruption can cause you to forget to shut down or log off. A PITA to be sure but better than dealing with problems like you had. PM me if you need help setting up passwords/log ons.
And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin
Peace,
Alice
I would never have anything to do with him anymore and if you bump into him at a family function look staight through him . sorry but that ones difficult to forgive it could of cost you your marriage
Jessired, you look good to me. I saw the avatar and then was surprised not to see GG on your name. You look like a redheaded GG I sat next to on a course I did some years ago.
Your upset is understandable, your privacy has been deeply violated.
Give youself time to get over the anger and don't let this morons worthless opinion upset your confidance.
Hey Girl, Number one...you are cute,very, would love to see a head to toe pic, number two...you did just what you should have and kicked his sorry butt out of your house, would not let him back, family or not ! And number three...if he keeps running his mouth, I would meet him somewhere remote and then he could tell his friends how an "very ugly woman" CD beat the living crap out of him with her purse! Kaitlin
PS...I think naked and handcuffed to a stop sign in a small town in Ark. would be just what he needs!
I love Jesus!
Life is so much better now that I know who I am !
Take the highroad. Family is important. You dont have to like or respect one another to be in the same room. You dont want to be part of a wedge between sisters unwittingly
If it had have been me it was said about and in my house, he wouldn't have been walking out the door... Or walking for that matter. P$#&k would have left in a body bag.
Nobody comes into my house and tells me what i should and shouldn't do.
To quote a line from a classic aussie movie, the castle... "a man's home is his castle"
i am what I am, I do what I do..
i do not seek approval from others.
I hear some of them in the evening put on women's clothing and...
I hate nosy people. I figure if they want to know anything about me, they can have to guts to ask me to my face rather than sneaking around. This is one reason I use the screen saver which requires re-using the password. Where does this guy come off anyway, especially since he's not even a part of the family? You have every reason to be upset Jessi, I wouldn't ever thrust this guy again.
No, dress him up & drop him outside a naval base.
What a jerk! Banish him for the immediate future (I say that b/c you never know how things might change in five years, or ten, or twenty -- and not even then until he sincerely apologized -- and not even then until he earns back a modicum of respect, which is something he needs to sincerely work for). It is wonderful your SO is behind you and that your family knows -- you've got unity there! What does your SO's sister have to say about the incident (not that her opinion should give you pause to rethink your very justifiable reaction)???
how many Red Flags do you need? He's probably checking out your dressers also! The guys a flake and is going to cause you more trouble if you let him!
move on and forget him...
[SIZE="2"][/SIZE][SIZE="3"]Big Hugs!
Ash[/SIZE]
I think pretty much everything that needs to be said on this thread has been already, i just wanted to reinforce that if he thinks you're a "very ugly woman" then he's never seen an atttractive one. you look great.
And i think you handled it much better than i would have. you "almost feel violated"?? I would definately feel violated. Total invasion of privacy, and that doesn't fly with this girl.
But I'd make it clear it is because he snooped around on your computer. Don't let him believe it is because he knows or because he told someone. Hopefully, your SO made it clear that she knew and that she supports you and has by now had a long talk with her sister.
He was wrong, you not an ulgy betty.
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