In the words of Moby. Why does my heart feel so sad?

[hayden von beethoven]

So some people on here read my emo rants about Deana ripping my heart out, spitting on it, and jumping on it repeatedly... I now have a new love interest and I'm scared.

Very scared.

She's an old friend from high school, and she was the FIRST person to accept me as Hayden. She's amazing.

But...

I'm terrified of having my heart beat up again over a girl who will crush me for a man.

A born man.

Sometimes... I wish I could stop feeling =|

Any advice? Do I act on my feelings, that are shared by both parties? Or do I push her away and wait until I find someone I'm certain wont break my heart for a GM?

[Cai]

But you'll never be certain that anyone won't leave you. Is there anything that this girl has done that might make you think she'd leave you for a GM? If not, gauge your feelings to see if you're ready for another relationship, but I cautiously encourage you to go for it.

[hayden von beethoven]

Being left isn't what I'm afraid of, I know being left is always a possibility, but being left for a "real" man, thats what always hurts..

[Jaquelyn]

Look, life is uncertain, believe me, I have had enough happen in my life to know that much. That said you have two choices: live life, and enjoy a relationship with this girl, no matter what the future may hold. Or, you can live in fear and do nothing, which I am sure you already know, is going to get you nowhere. If you like each other, then, that's all that matters. If she leaves you after a while, what difference does it make if it is for a gm or gf or cding male or ? What sense does it make to worry about whom she may leave you for? Screw that, take her out, enjoy her company, buy her dinner, hold her hand, do what makes you two happy. Happy. That's what you want, right? Well, from your post, I think running from her because of a bad breakup with someone else, is not going to make you happy. Go live life.

[Sharon]

Just don't allow your "what if" concerns, ruin the relationship. Relationships can end for many,many reasons, some beyond our control, and others not. Be the best person you can be with your girlfriend, and the liklihood of its continuing will be greatly enhanced.

Has your girlfriend given you any reason to worry? Otherwise, just let it go because it does you no good to worry about the unknown.

[AllieSF]

Darlene said it all so clearly and succinctly. Enjoy what you have. Good luck.

[ZenFrost]

I think you should take the risk. But only if you feel comfortable doing so. If you think that your fears are so great that they would ruin your relationship, then don't, but if you think you can let go of your fears for the relationship then you should at least give it a chance. You also might want to make it clear to her why your last relationship ended before you start dating to make sure she wont leave you for the same reason. I really hope this goes better than what happened with Deana, and I'm sorry she was so heartless to do that to you.

[xsideburnsx]

I think that general fear plagues most of us FTMs who are into genetic girls. I think it ultimately kills any relationship I've been in. If she's willing to take a chance on you, I can't say it's easy to let go of that feeling...but I think you need to be fair and put as much into her as she's willing to put into you. I think if you want a real relationship that's going to last...you've got to be willing to put in your all and take the chance.

[Felix]

I agree with Jake only fall back might be that when ya do that ya run risks too like the other person may not put the same in as you then this can also hurt. Sometimes lifes about risks and if ya never take any ya might not get the very thing that could make ya happy. Good luck Hun and enjoy xx Felix

[Charleen]

Life is what happens around us while we are paying more attention to all the "what ifs".

[Dasein9]

If you never climb to the heights, you'll stay nice and cosy and safe.

If you do climb, you may fall and dash yourself on the rocks. You may get to the top, and survey the world. And -- this is very rare -- you may just fly.

If you never climb, you'll stay cosy and safe. And bored.

Your choice.

[hayden von beethoven]

to all of you! Thanks for the words, and I think I'm just going to go ahead and let whats meant to happen, happen. She could be the best thing that ever happens to me, she could be the worst. But like my mama always said, you never know until you try.


Thanks again, love all of you oh so much <3

[ZenFrost]

to all of you! Thanks for the words, and I think I'm just going to go ahead and let whats meant to happen, happen. She could be the best thing that ever happens to me, she could be the worst. But like my mama always said, you never know until you try.


Thanks again, love all of you oh so much <3

And we all love you too. In a manly way.

[hayden von beethoven]

Hahaha of course in a manly way. So she and I have a trip planned to our old high school next month sometime.

I'm scared out of my wits.

Last time she saw me I was around 300lbs with a green mohawk LOL! She'll be shocked to say the last.