why do you all want to be crossdressers?

[crusadergirl]

Why be a crossdresser its not something most ppl like. As much as i love being kirra at times its not worth it. I don't go by labels so i don't think of my self as cd and just a girl prodigy. Are maybe i'm not anything at all.
My Question is why do you want to be a crossdresser?
What does it mean to you?
Are you worried you will lose your friends or family over something you like to do?
Lately i haven't had much use for kirra, but now that its halloween i'm starting to want to dress again.
But the bad thing i'm starting to talk to more ppl about it that don't know i'm a cd.
I believe you should be yourself and live life how you want but there are to many haters out there that make it hard. I'm not the type of person to be scare of what ppl think are do to me, i love to fight.
I'm just thinking sometimes you have to give up things you love to do for others.
Thanks for all your help in this forum and good luck to everybody here.

[DawnRodgers]

I dresws because that's how I feel the most natural and at ease with myself. Many times thr feelings go deeper and would rather live my life as a woman and not as a man. Their is no question that I, often, feel my attraction is oftyen to men and my feelings toward women is one of friendship and kinship. Would much rather spend time with women on a friendship level than with men. My interests are feminine not masculine.
Love the clothes, the style and the appearance. As a man I feel so ordinary and blend in with the fgroup. As a woman, I can stand out and be myself.

[Joann0830]

We all have experienced a feeling, some of us since very young in our childhood and know that deep in our hearts we should have been a Girl instead of a boy. Its not just dressing up, its trying to be the real me but without the painful surgery and the great expense of the change especially this late in life. Its like the person who enjoys his or her previous life as a child and realizes that you cannot go back there but realizes that there was something in that childhood that gave you the greatest pleasure. So you try to relive it in someway. Mine is to try to live the life that I know that was the real me. The Little Girl within that I grew up wanting to happen,but there were issues of family values that we had to deal with, but know a window of opportunity has opened and its the last shot at being happy and expressing the real ME. Joann

[My Lady Marsea]

Dawn & Joann said it for me too. I feel the same on all points. I do this now 7/24 because it is the real me and I love the real me. It makes me happy and fulfilled.

[noname]

I don't consider myself a CD, I'm just me. But why do I do what I do? Because I don't believe other people should dictate to me what I need to wear and I don't need to validate to anyone else that I'm a "real man" be it through my attitude or clothing.

What about friends and family? I'd say it shows you who your real friends are. Family? I didn't call my family up and make an announcement. But I also know they have a pretty good idea about me. They just don't make a point to talk about it. Of course your milage may vary.

[eleventhdr]

Well that is kind of a loaded question there are some reasons why boy mlaes want to wear what is still considered female clothing but should not be so limited indeed!

As for my own personal reason's it is because when i was still a child i did see girl's as the magical sex they did seem to have something that boy's male's just do not have and very probaly never will.

They are the natural sex as it take's more to make up a mlae than a female feamle's are what everone would be natural if something was not added during pregancy that chnages a developing female baby into a male bAby we would all be female's if not for that so for some of us it is just to dress as a girl and try to feel and understand as best we can what being female is really all about for a lot more of us it is that we really are girl's born in the male sex bodies but we want to change back into the sex that we really do feel we are i am one of those i do wish i was a real gg anyway. perhap's more later Thank's Suzy Ann!

[RobertaFermina]

Your question is couched in such ambivalence that, to me, It seems more like a statement: "Why should I bother to do what I want when I get so much flak?"

Seems it is not worth it to you, not safe enough.

Valid judgment. Just CD on Halloween when it is "safe."


As for me, I don't know why I do it. But the more I do it, the better my understanding. I'm growing as a human being, adding more feminine understanding and experience to my "portfolio". I'm having great fun. I'm positively impacting more lives than my own. I'm challenging my daughter's and others more parochial views on Gender.

"It works *FOR* me."

Roberta

[angelfire]

I wouldn't say I wanted to be a crossdresser originally. It wasn't something where I sat down and told myself, "You know what would be great. If I was a crossdresser. I think I should become one." I didn't plan it, I didn't hope for it, it just happened that way. I don't really have a choice about how I feel, so I don't "choose" to be a crossdresser, I just am, so I may as well make the best of it, right?

[DAVIDA]

I can tell you that I never wanted to be a cross dresser! This is what I am. I would not wish this on anyone! Feeling insecure, alone, strange and weird!
Living the life that I live, being a CD, is definately not what I would have chosen if I were given a choice. But, this is what I am and there is nothing that I can do about that. I just have dealt with my life as a CD the best that I can. Whitch I can say that I embrace the way that I have been since birth!

[Christine Andrews]

I would say that from an early age I had a fascination with female clothing, it appealed to me and I wanted so badly to wear it but at that age I didn't know better and I just carried on as I was raised, intrigued and a little jealous of other girls.

Why I crossdress is simple- its a feeling and desire deep within me which I realised at primary school. A play was being put on and I got a minor part and the role (being Tudor period) required the boys to wear either football (soccer) socks or tights. I didn't own any football socksWhen I saw the tights being prepared for dress rehersal I paniced - I felt scared of myself because I wanted to wear them and I quit the play.

I have regretted that action letting fear rule me completely and denying myself the experience I wanted for so long. Since that moment the feeling in me which has been there as long as I can remember grew stronger and when I did finally dress for the first time aged 12/13ish it was a powerful feeling that has hooked me into this ever since.

Why - because it is part of me which has always existed and I realised that I have accept it and learn to manage that part of myself and learn to acknowledge that there is no reason to feel guilty. I wouldn't say I chose crossdressing I'd say it chose me.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Dawn & Joann said it for me too. I feel the same on all points. I do this now 7/24 because it is the real me and I love the real me. It makes me happy and fulfilled.

I'll put in MY Two Cents in this thread to balance things out a bit and state that I cd to GET AWAY from the real me. I think that fully HALF of us CDers are like ME.---Although y'all "Fem-siders" and quasi-TS types tend to be more "vocal" and write the most posts.

A lot of us need to take "vacations" from ourselves---our real MALE selves, to get OUT of our personal identity and "maleness" for a while and release the pressures and stresses. CDis a great way to do that and is the ultimate form of relaxation.

[Suzy Harrison]

I don't think any of us have any "choice" in the way we feel. This feeling finds us - we don't go out looking for it. So we don't choose to do it or not do it.

I never felt comfortable as a boy growing up. Didn't like sports or many boy type things. Even now I feel more comfortable around females than males.

I make a better looking female than male anyday. I don't know where it's going to lead me, but I'm very happy with it..

[Zelda Noe]

Because its fun and its what i am. It has cause some problems but so does my playing golf to often.

Zelda

[maryjanecapri]

i don't WANT to be one. i AM one though. that's like asking someone why they want to be gay, or why they want to be black, or white, or brown.

i have a dear friend who is a black gay man. when people ask him if being gay is a choice he replies, do you think i would choose to have a second strike against me? he says "as if being black in this country isn't hard enough, being gay and black????"

[Deborah Jane]

As a lot of others here say...Its not a choice, it,s the way we are born. You either learn to accept yourself like this or drive yourself mad refusing too!! If i wasn,t born with this inside me, would i want to crossdress?? Probably not!!

[Joann0830]

I must have read your words over and over and found that this line says what it all about for you.
"I'm just thinking sometimes you have to give up things you love to do for others"
Every one else believes that WE ARE WORTH it and to give up something you say you Love then You do not have a strong Love for yourself. Maybe its because a lot of us have had this feeling inside since we were Very Very Young and know that there is something different about us and have explored that feeling and really want it now more then before. A lot of us as you can read have found that love of ourselves is quite strong and will not give it up for the fears or ridicules of anyone. I hope that you can Understandwhat I wrote someone once and that is "When you are young you feel your in love in your mind but when you are older you feel that love stronger in your mind and your heart" Joann

[Vicky8411]

For me its a stress reliever. Sometimes Im stressed and just put some womensweare and it all goes away after a while.

I would like to go enfeme for a couple of days (at home of curse). I dont have a need to do this 24/7.

[Sheri 4242]

For many years I would have answered much like Mary Jane:

i don't WANT to be one. i AM one though.

Today, I have reached a mindset, where, to not dress would be a total denial of who and what I am. Dressing is the outward and visible expression of a dichotomous personna. Many on here say they don't want to be labeled -- and I can appreciate the sentiment. That said, though, it isn't always that simple. We use language to be able to communicate on a level playing field -- and the words that make-up language have to have definitions!

I have to agree with Robeta when she said:

Your question is couched in such ambivalence that, to me, It seems more like a statement . . .

In fact, it is more than ambivalence. It seems to me that you haven't reached a point where you can love yourself fully and freely for who and what you are. To be able to love others -- and have a positive impact on the world around you -- you have to love yourself first -- which means coming to terms with all apects regarding yourself, including your inner balance and being at peace with yourself.

We all go about dressing (and not dressing) in similar ways -- and ways that aren't similar. We come from different cultures and backgrounds -- and each of us is the sum of our own personal experiences to date, and those that are left to come!

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I dress because it's who I am. I spent practically most of my life doing everything in my power to get rid of and remove this side of me. In the end it didn't work and my femme side became more and more stronger as a result. Now she is a part of me, and I'm starting to get to the point where my male side is now more of a part of her. Jocelyn

[Gurly]

In the words of Colin Clive in the original 1931 version of Frankenstein...."It's alive!!!". In other words, my crossdressing is an out-of-control monster. Besides, it's fun and I don't question the "why's" about it. I've wasted too much time during my youth questioning it. It's what I am and I cannot change it.

[Marla S]

Why be a crossdresser its not something most ppl like.

Quite a few reasons there. In general you attack the norms ... Societies don't like that.
You risk your social status and that of everyone who accepts you.

My Question is why do you want to be a crossdresser?

Its not a question of wanting or not.
You become one, as soon as you buy your clothes or cosmetics in the 'wrong' department.

What does it mean to you?

It means that I have to cope with problems, I wouldn't have if I would buy my clothes in the 'right' department.

Are you worried you will lose your friends or family over something you like to do?

Of course, there are tons of examples of others and own experiences.

I'm not the type of person to be scare of what ppl think are do to me, i love to fight.

Me too, but in the long run it is exhausting.

I'm just thinking sometimes you have to give up things you love to do for others.

Very true.

[Marcie Sexton]

I think what you missed is that although we all feel more comfortable dressed, we also have a sense of duty andf loyality to the family...

Especially if we have family that is accepting...I have and did quit dressing for the family, luckly my wife came to accept me and it has made us stronger as a couple...

While I speake for myself only there is some selfishness when I dress and buy clothes, make up, and all the girlie things I like, I would also gladly give it up for the sake of my family, they are first and foremost when it comes to my life...

[Marianna Julianna]

I never wanted to me a crossdresser dear, I just am, same as I have the skin colour I do, the eye colour,the hair colour (what little I have left anyway) it's not something I can take or leave, even in my mostly male dressed time I am still what I am.

[Valerie]

Like others who have replied, I don't believe I have a choice, except to repress or accept, and if accept, how much, when and how. Repressing powerful desires always has dreadful results--it returns in different ways, and bursts out like the alien green creature in the movie... So it all may depend on how much wanting there is (not "I want", since the "I" gives the illusion that "I" create and control this desire).

I bought some bulbs for my garden yesterday. There was so much variety, so many colors and forms!

Valerie

[Mitch23]

dunno really - like would be a whole lot simpler (and more boring) if I didn't

Mitch