The Gift of Crossdressing

[Lovely Rita]

Taking Things for Granted

Sadly it is part of the human condition. The poor dream of being rich and when they are they dream of something else. The illusive quest for happiness is many times reduced to nothing more than a mirage. It does not have to be a mirage but sadly many times it is.

Think of all the times you have reached your intended goals and then still fail to enjoy the moment. The satisfaction is temporal and fleeting.

It is the unquenchable thirst in us that causes us to relegate our dreams to the heap of dissatisfaction.

We need to make a conscious decision to appreciate and keep the fervor and delight alive, otherwise things become mundane and common place.

We are also part of the equation. We can choose to keep the excitement for those parts of life we hold dear, or we can become as wanderers in a desert in search of a non-existent Oasis.

We are both the problem and the solution. The answer is many times in ourselves. How we process the gifts life brings us. Do we place value on our wonderful gifts or do we reduce their value by forgetting to appreciate them.

Appreciation can be a valuable lesson for us if we heed the importance of it. What is it that holds our fancy when it comes to our dreams and longings? We are at the root of everything we experience and we are responsible for how much we enjoy or fail to enjoy. It comes down to how much we trully believe. The one who believes the most gets the prize. Believe this to be a priceless gift and it is. The problem is that to believe can take a lot. What we think matters. What we believe is important and powerful.

There is no panacea or one size fits all elixir. We all need to take an introspective look at how we appreciate the gifts in life.


Depending on how I look at things I can see my life today as rich beyond my dreams or as poor as my nightmares. Much of it is up to me. Not all, but a great deal is in my hands.

It many times is my choice and how I will look at things from this moment on. Will I quiet the noise that has been programmed into me by years of ignorance? My ignorance combined with the ignorance of others is a lethal and poisonous mixture.

Years of lessons bent on getting me to hate myself. Lessons that were passed on by society’s view of cross dressers as a whole have been deleterious to say the least. I have chosen to unlearn those lessons. Many times I do a pretty good job at house cleaning but they are so powerful that I have to dust from time to time because their effects have been so far reaching in my psyche that I could not even begin to fathom how deep they go.

I have chosen Joy and Love and that is my quest. It is also my wish for all of you.

Love yourself and Love others.

[SweetCaroline]

It's the difference between sex and gender.

Sex is something we are born with, gender is something we are taught.

I think it's pretty simple. A lot of women aren't satisfied with the genders they were Taught as a child, they are called Tom-Boys and are praised.

Likewise, some men were not satisfied with the genders we we taught as a child, and we're called Sissies and have been ridiculed.

I intend to live in an age where we are not ridiculed.

[Lovely Rita]

It's the difference between sex and gender.

Sex is something we are born with, gender is something we are taught.

I think it's pretty simple. A lot of women aren't satisfied with the genders they were Taught as a child, they are called Tom-Boys and are praised.

Likewise, some men were not satisfied with the genders we we taught as a child, and we're called Sissies and have been ridiculed.

I intend to live in an age where we are not ridiculed.

I think I will join you in that age

[Marissa_Black]

Hi Rita, I have really missed you and your eloquent, thoughtful posts. I hope you're back a little more often!!!

[Marla S]

Hi Rita, great you popped in.

Once again a Lovely, powerful and insightful post.

Thank You.

Taking Things for Granted

Sadly it is part of the human condition. The poor dream of being rich and when they are they dream of something else. The illusive quest for happiness is many times reduced to nothing more than a mirage. It does not have to be a mirage but sadly many times it is.

Think of all the times you have reached your intended goals and then still fail to enjoy the moment. The satisfaction is temporal and fleeting.

The journey is the reward.

Five simple words.
The meaning seems obvious, but it isn't.
To get the meaning is the real treasure.

[battybattybats]

Yay! Rita's back!

What I'm trying to work out, is what is the best way to spread the message through the general community that this is a gift and not a curse.


Batty

[Nicole Erin]

Yay! Rita's back!

What I'm trying to work out, is what is the best way to spread the message through the general community that this is a gift and not a curse.


Batty

Good luck with that. People in general are too ignorant to rely on anything other than their own narrow-minded prejudice.

[SweetCaroline]

Yay! Rita's back!

What I'm trying to work out, is what is the best way to spread the message through the general community that this is a gift and not a curse.


Batty

I think it's just to appear as yourself.

I mean if a woman was to appear in your community in a baseball cap, jeans, and tee-shirt, would she be beaten to death and ridiculed for appearing as a "man" when she was born a woman???

I think not.

Why shouldn't we be allowed the same freedoms.

[battybattybats]

Well If I go out in my local community dressed I may slowly change the minds of some of those in my local community, certainly a worthy goal though being in a small rural city/town it's not something I'm sure is safe enough yet.. still pondering that.

However I have grander thoughts in mind, reaching more people than my local community... because to change the society substantially would require a large number of people like me to overcome concerns like mine all at the same time to gain critical mass in public conciousness.

So that is a good idea, but how to implement it? Safety in numbers, support networks, organisation and coordination.. those would all help such a plan, though it would be a slow hard slog for many concerned.

But communication, positive propaganda if you will, can pave the way for that, make it easier. The TG related tv and films around certainly help, but there could always be more and more effective forms I'm sure.

[SandyR]

Seatle fish company does it best. "pick your mood for the day". There motto!

I choose to live live each day to its best! Not every day can be filled with all you want, but its a blessing. I love to get dressed, but today I took great joy in painting some new nails (learned that from Karen) to go with my outfit when I get to meet a fellow girl from the forum latter this month.


Huggs....

SandyR

[Lovely Rita]

Hi Rita, I have really missed you and your eloquent, thoughtful posts. I hope you're back a little more often!!!

I could not resist this time especially with the holidays. Thanks Marissa

Hi Rita, great you popped in.

Once again a Lovely, powerful and insightful post.

Thank You.



The journey is the reward.

Five simple words.
The meaning seems obvious, but it isn't.
To get the meaning is the real treasure.

Thanks Marla, but it is just a reminder. It has been said before but must always be said. We have to constantly remind ourselves or we may forget.

Remember, remember, remember

Yay! Rita's back!

What I'm trying to work out, is what is the best way to spread the message through the general community that this is a gift and not a curse.


Batty

I guess what I was trying to convey is that it is what we make it. I choose gift as opposed to curse, which I have considered it in early years.

The more we see it as a gift and not a curse could influence and permeate through the fabric of society, maybe, anyway it is a nice thought

[Jazzmine]

Rita, I agree CD is a gift. You're heart tells you what feels right or wrong and what I feel as a CD is definitely right. The emotions are positive and gentle.

Batty, I also agree that CDrs are positive for society and the more we embrace the notion that we are "gifted" the more we can positively communicate it to society. This gifted feeling would need to translate into something tangible for society for everyone to buy into it. So to take it further we need to come up with some WIFMs (what's in it for me?) from society's point of view.

I mean we don't want to be advocates for "women" - they can do it for themselves and don't need our patronage. With a little thought and collaboration we could come up with a heart felt message to represent CDs and at the same time breaks down society's barriers.

Good food for thought over Christmas time!

Jazzmine

Just an extra thought. Much of the TG stuff out in society is done by non-TG people. In other words it is an interpretation of us ( movies, documentaries, reviews etc) from outside the TG community. If more CDs were encouraged to write and detail their lives publicly then these first hand accounts would probably be less biased and positive. I still get the feeling that current interpretations are smirking at us! Evolution is great but revolution is quicker!!!

[Mary Morgan]

Rita, I love what you have said here, and said so eloquently. I love being transgender, I love being me. Oh sure, I have more work to do to become the person I really want to be, but I love the equipment I have been given. Okay, so I wish I were shorter, and tinier, and had smaller hands and feet, but I would not trade my gender orientation for anything. Inspite of the problems and misunderstandings, I believe I am an essential part of God's creation just as I am.

[Kate Simmons]

People are just people. The sooner everyone sees they are no one "special", the better. The sooner others see that who we are and what we do is not harmful, the better. I never ask for "permission" to be myself, I just am. If we don't make an issue of it and just go about our business no one else will either. Who we are and how we act is proof in iiself. Just be yourself--it works.

[Mitch23]

Nice to share in your beautiful and thoughtful insights again Rita - you have lit up my day.

Mitch

[Lovely Rita]

Nice to share in your beautiful and thoughtful insights again Rita - you have lit up my day.

Mitch

Hi Mitch,

Thank you for choosing to have your day lit up and thank you for allowing me to participate just as a reminder.