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Thread: man calls cops on me.

  1. #1
    Senior Member vivianann's Avatar
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    man calls cops on me.

    I was at a store enfemme last week where I was buying some food, a man happens to see me and gave me a nasty look, and goes to the other side of the store and calls the police on his cell phone, I did not know he had called the police at that time, I made my purchases then left. several minutes later my phone rings and it is the cashier at the store who happens to be a good friend called to tell me that several police came into the store and searched every square inch of the building, and they told her that they were told that there was a suspicious looking man in a dress impersonating a woman. The cashier told the police that I was her friend and that I come in dressed like a woman often and she did not see anything wrong with what I was doing, then the man came over to where the police was and demanded that they find me and arrest me for impersonating a woman. she said to him to mind his own business, Then the owner of the store was called over, and he told the police that it did not bother him that I come in dressed as a woman, and he said to the police that I have never done anything to cause any problems. The police asked for my ph.# and address because they want to talk to me, but the cashier said she does not know my address (which is true) she told them that she did not know my ph#, which is true also, but she had my # in her call log, she was mad that the jerk called the police on me, and she told me to please be careful. The police did tell the jerk that it was not illegal for a man to wear a dress as long as he does not solicite for sex or any other illegal activities. the police also asked if I was dressed innapropriately, the cashier told them I was dressed very modestly, and that my dress was below the knee and that my collar was to my neck (which is true) and I had a women coat on too. I am very thankful that the cashier and store owner were on my side through all of this, I have since quit dressing in pulic for now, I sure miss going out enfemme, I have been in the store in drab since this incident, and the cashier and the store owner has treated me very nice, and the store owner has told me that he does not have a problem with me coming to his store wearing a dress as long as I dress modestly, I was surprised when he told me that, I was glad he did not tell me to not to wear a dress to his store. I really do not want to talk to the police about me wearing womens clothes, and I am glad my friend would not give them my contact info.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Joann0830's Avatar
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    In a sense The Police Defended You

    I am a Former Police Officer and will tell you that if a situation like that ever happens to you, cooperate and the same way he called the Police on you you have the right to counter charge him with Harassment and is open for a lawsuit for Defamation of character as he was stating that you were doing something illegal, which you were not. Please do Not allow that man to hinder your personel enjoyment with his stupidity. If You ever speak to the Salesperson at the store or the manager again and they bring it up advise them to also tell the man about Laws that protect you as well. The Police Officers under the New Guidelines cannot be prejudicial and must act upon information but also must advise "Soap Box Lawyers " as I call them of the real Laws that protect everyone including you. Take a trip to the Library or on line you would be surprised. My Tri Ess Group as most of them have "rights of a cross dresser" Please realize that in N.Y. California and other states They have Parades for supporting them. Joann

    Idid some research for you www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=17438 - 46k -
    Last edited by Joann0830; 12-26-2007 at 04:10 AM.

  3. #3
    Senior Member vivianann's Avatar
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    Thanks Joann, i appreciate the info, and you are right about the police defending me, I did not reallize that I could file charges against the man, but then it would make the news, and I am not quite ready for that now. I will start going in public dressed as a woman next week.

  4. #4
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    Some people are just so "small minded" What was his problem, you weren,t bothering him!!! Why can,t people just "Live and let live". Maybe then the world would be a happier place!!!

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member Brianna Lovely's Avatar
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    Vivian

    I'm sorry to hear about your near incident in the store. Of course, this would make me go out dressed every day, giggle.

    Anyway, what bothers me, is the statement by the police 'was she dressed "decent"? What are they, the moral police? Do they go around "inspecting" GGs for improper dress? Like, no bras and nipples showing? Too tight shorts on over weight ladies, with their fat rolls hanging over the waist band? Men who dress and look like slobs, dirty clothes and needing a shave and shower?

    OK, off the soap box............................
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  6. #6
    Happy sixties Eugenie's Avatar
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    In many states in the USA, this is, I think, considered as an act of gender discrimination. It would be considered a diccriminatory attitude in Europe where the Carter of Fundamental Rights prohibits discrimination on the basis of race, age, handicap, religion, gender, sexual orientation.

    The police were right in saying that had you dressed provocatively looking really like a hooker, or had you been using a female impersonation for a robbery, then it would have been illegal.

    Your experience shows that there are still some stupid intollerant people and whatever the law they will react negatively to differences...

    I'm all in support of you.


    Eugenie

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Joann0830's Avatar
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    Vivian I am glad I helped you

    Vivian I am glad that the incident has not clouded your mind and that you will continue to do what you want to do about going out in (Fem/Dress) in public. Please remember That any remarks that the simple minded person said is grounds for Harasmment. The question that was put by another member was why did the Police ask how you were dressed,its only to find out if you were soliciting in the store, or if you were a vagrant shop lifting, sorry to say these things have happened and these would have been grounds for a Police action but in that case again he would have to be a complainant. But the Positive Statements by the clerk and Manager corrected any action in regards to the statement made by the discriminative male. If you ever have it happen to you with this male again just remember the date it happened and statements he made to the propritor and clerk at the store is proof and would constitute harsassment (as the Police Records would show the last Call) As far as Discrimination and Defamation of Character those are Civil charges that no police action can be taken but the other is and he does not want to be arrested guaranteed BTW more then likely, he would be warned by the Police of his pending criminal charges, then he would be warned to stop harassing you. I also hope that the other info was informative. Your Friend Joann0830
    Last edited by Joann0830; 12-26-2007 at 08:46 AM.

  8. #8
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
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    Vivian

    It may be worth telling the store manager and the cashier of these facts about you having the rights to a counter charge

    It might be they may just remind the jerk he could end up being arrested for his discriminatory comments
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member Eileen's Avatar
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    Vivian you were unfortunate to be in the store at the same time as that jerk. Glad you are still going out.

    Eileen

  10. #10
    Hugging the Kurves! RobertaFermina's Avatar
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    I find this person's reaction Highly Unusual!

    I feel angry and sad that a person is so fearful and judgmental as to do such a thing.

    I'm glad that the police are there for such people to call. If he didn't have the cops to call, what might he have done ?

    Now that he doesn't have the cops to call, knowing they are not "on his side", what might he do next time he gets worked up over a crossdresser?

    It's not a perfectly safe world. It is better to be aware that such ill-informed, and/or unstable characters exist.

    I'm glad, Vivienann, that you have such great friends who tipped you off and defended you. I hope you make many more such friends !


    Roberta
    [COLOR=Red]Open your Heart :

  11. #11
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    vivianne..

    actually...think about the other side of the story...u won that battle for sure

    i have had 4 encounters with police and they have been 100% cool....repeat...the police are cool and they see soooooo much in their jobs, they probably didnt like that the guy called and wasted their time...

    jerks are out there..when you boil it all down, they are the reason some of us can't get comfortable going out..
    you are just being yourself and i hope you really remember that

  12. #12
    Semi Sane innocent angel
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    All I can say thank goodness my state has specific anti transgender laws. Most cops I know would of be irritated at him for calling the cops just cause you were in a dress. It takes them out of service for some thing stupid. Like an idiot that cant cope with a man in a dress

  13. #13
    Maturing Member JoAnnDallas's Avatar
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    There is one charge that you could have had the cops arrest him for. He voilated your civil rights by calling the cops on you. You were doing nothing illegal. Plus he falsey having you charged, so you could have had him arrested for that too. Many states have laws that protect you based on your civil rights. You could have made it so costly for him becuase any lawyer would have told him he has no case.

  14. #14
    Member Wendi {LI NY}'s Avatar
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    Hi Vivian,
    I can not beleive this happen to you ? Hon. Boy ,what a jerk . Well thank god you didnt get so upset or scare that you went back in the closet.
    Well good for you the way you handle it and hooray from the cashier and her Mgr. hugs,Wendi

  15. #15
    Senior Member Ruth's Avatar
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    You are right in theory JoAnn but I think it is generally best to avoid litigation unless absolutely necessary. The best resolution in this case would probably have been to remain until the cops came and have them tell the guy in your presence that no laws are being broken. Perhaps he would have a moment of clarity and realise he needs to find something else to get upset about.
    [SIZE="2"]Always be true to yourself because the people who matter don’t mind, and the people who mind don’t matter.[/SIZE]

  16. #16
    Life is more fun in heels Genifer Teal's Avatar
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    I can't imagine something like that happening here. I hope it is not the norm where you live. So sorry it happened to you. It is probably best you were no longer at the store. You did nothing wrong. Seeing the police couldn't have been a good experience. Don't let this hold you or anyone else back from being who they are. This would never have happened here unless maybe someone was out in their underwear. Even then it might have to be pretty skimpy. lol

    Hugs - Genifer

  17. #17
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    It is kind of funny, the state of Colorado is years behind the rest of the nation, yet the police seem non-discriminating and are not jerks.

    I have had to deal with the PD in Colorado a few times and every time, things could have gone worse. The one time I was pulled over and en femme, the fact that I was en femme had no bearing on the whole encounter.

    I used to live in CO and the place is bad news for GLBT's.
    The guy in the store, I wonder if he was part of "Focus on the Family"?
    And for that guy - he probably acts like that everywhere he goes.

    Now what was that guy expecting? Did he really think the police were going to read you your rights and take you in for wearing a dress? I mean G.D., I don't know a single police officer who would want to even mess with the extra paperwork...

    The only way some CD's could get arrested is if the fashion police were called.
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member Brianna Lovely's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Genifer Teal View Post
    I can't imagine something like that happening here. I hope it is not the norm where you live.

    This would never have happened here unless maybe someone was out in their underwear. Even then it might have to be pretty skimpy. lol
    Hugs - Genifer
    NYC, the home of "The Naked Cowboy", giggle
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  19. #19
    Outdoor girl seeking..... Sam-antha's Avatar
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    I would never have thought of the harassment or civil rights charges, but now we all know. Thanks to a small minded man.

    Now you can get right out there and be happy. You and all the others tht had fears aboutwht could legally happen

    ~Samm
    .
    'Kerriana "Samantha.....i feel like I'm hearing her through fractured glass.. She makes sense if you kinda squint"


  20. #20
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    He should have been nicked for wasting police time.
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  21. #21
    Gold Member TxKimberly's Avatar
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    Vivian

    A few things I'd like to point out.
    Take it from someone that goes out in public a lot - his behavior was highly unusual AND inapprorpiate. Don't let some idiot scare you into hiding.
    You live in a wonderful State. Colorado is a great place, with friendly and open minded people - go enjoy your life among them.
    You have done nothing wrong. More thank likely the police would have taken a good look at you, maybe try to observe your behavior, maybe ask the store folks about you. All of this would be just to make sure that your atire and behavior were appropriate. Assuming it was, nothing would have been done to you other than that.
    Not that you did, but it sort of annoys me when people lump the police or the military into the "Dumb brute? catagory. Nothing could be farther from the truth. These men and women are just like the rest of us - they have mothers, fathers, sister, brothers, children, hopes, and dreams. Of course there are exceptions to any rule, but you CAN count on the majority of them to be decent people that have no desire to make your life any harder than it's got to be. More than likely the only thing they would have done is to educate the idiot that called them that there was nothing illegal with your actions.
    You do what your comfortable with, but don't let that fool send you running to the closet if you dont want to be there. :-)

  22. #22
    Ms. New Booty angelfire's Avatar
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    I used to work retail, and as unfortunate as it is, we once caught a crossdresser shop lifting. She went through the cash and everything, but had hidden a few things in her purse. Of course, none of us even knew she was a CDer, she was pretty passable. I only found out the next day when someone said she went in, but came out without the wig on.

    As far as I heard, that was the only CDer we caught for it. There were other CDers who came in every now and then, not frequently, but we never had any problems with any others.

  23. #23
    Junior Member
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    I had the cops called on me also. I also left before they got there. I was pulled over the next day and questioned in reference to a man driving a vehicle matching my cars description dressed as a girl. I told em it wasn't me and they looked at me funny but let me go. I was wearing a shortish skirt when the cops were called so my guess is that was the illegal act they considered me comitting.

    I also worked in retail for a few years and we had some CDers come in. None ever started any trouble. Some people are just idiots.

  24. #24
    Member Jennifer Brooks's Avatar
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    Never thought something like that could/would ever happen. I'm sure it was nerve racking but since you didn't do anything wrong, to hell with that guy. Thank goodness you had someone there you knew to cover for you.

  25. #25
    Senior Member serinalynn's Avatar
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    I go out dresssed especially in the warner weather, and have never had an experience like vivianann had. I don't even try to pass either. I just like to wear a plunge bra and a low neck line top.

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