Just finished another 4 day 24/7 stint in girl mode. I wanted to find my limit and to push my limit, and this afternoon I found I just couldn't deal with the heels, the forms, or the straps and garters anymore.
The neat thing now is that once back in Dockers and a shirt and men's loafers and Old Spice, I once again have that feeling of liberation. I feel like a guy again, a regular guy! Cross dressing is the farthest thing from my mind now! Is this how "regular" guys feel all the time? Man that's nice!!!
The ones without this curse? I am curious. That is why I sometimes push that female, dressing overdose thing as far as I can so when I return to the drab guy mode the feeling sticks around a little longer. I realize what I am and have learned to live with it but I wish it wasn't that way. I've never been caught, never even been suspected as being a CD but it has screwed up my life bigtime and has cost me many friends and intimate relationships because of my secret little "hobby."
After an overdose week in drag and in going back to who I really am I feel tired but relieved. I really enjoy the feeling of being a guy again and it usually lasts a couple weeks until I feel the need to "hit the silk" once again.
What do you older guys think about this? I'm not hassling you younger folks but life is a long road and you have no idea what is coming until you get there! Believe me it does get worse!
It might be hormonal changes with age or something else but the "true" guy mode seems to last a little less each time for me when I do a "mental" purge. First and foremost I am a guy, a hard charging alpha male but this CD thing seems to be getting more involved over time and that is a distressing thought even though I have come to grips with my "other" self. Any thoughts?