going out dressed

[trannie T]

Crank up your courage, use a good antipersperant and do it! How to buy women's clothing? Determine your size, you can do this by checking out a website or a clothing catalog. You can buy anything you wish over the net and be completely anonamous. It is more fun to buy things in stores and clerks don't really care what you purchase.
When you get dressed and are ready to get out of the closet it is time to crank up the courage and do it. The first time out is a terrifying experience but still is wonderful fun. Choose a place to go such as a club or a support group. If you are having a hard time working up the courage International Crossdressers Day is October 31, in some areas it is also called Halloween.

[Fab Karen]

We all started out at some sort of uncomfortable stage, such as only going out on Halloween, getting comfortable with shopping for femme things in stores...
Don't sit & think & think about it, just keep walking & head out that door. & listen to your Auntie Tamara V., she knows what she's doing & has some good advice/info.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

I went out enfemme with my girlfriends the first time and then had enough courage to go out by myself and theres no stopping me now.I go out enfemme now everyday .

[jennifer41356]

how does everyone here come up with the courage to go out dressed as a girl. I am 21 and i really want to go out dressed in casually dressed clothes (skirts, jeans, baby doll tops...etc) or even in cute dresses. I just dont have the courage to yet. What is everyone's story? how did you start going out? also, how can i buy feminine clothing (skirts, dresses, flats, high heels) in boy mode without getting weird looks or should i just not care what others think. thanks <3.

it took me awhile, I was always afraid that people would see the heavy makeup, so once I had electrolysis and had the beard removed , I didnt need so much makeup.

I started by going to the gay clubs and to a couple of restaurants in the gay area of Dallas to get my feet wet....once i felt I had a nice enough wig(which I still hate to wear) I went to the discount stores like Ross and TJ Maxx, and when things went well, I expanded, my dream was to walk through the Mall as a lady and I did that for the first time in 1993 and it was wonderful, been going out as a girl ever since

It took maybe 1 year or so to finally make the plunge, looking back I wish I had done it sooner, most people dont pay you any mind, but for me it was hiding the beard and I still think if some suspects I am not a girl its because of the wig..which I now wear a shorter style because the times I was read, I had a long wig on and they can look pretty bad after awhile especially when wearing them in the summer out here in Dallas
so hang in there and it will soon feel right for you
Jennifer

[charlie]

Hello Katie!
For me, I started by getting all dressed up and then going to a club that was a gay bar and very close by. I would struggle to get out of the car, but finally did. At that first club nobody said anything bad, most said nothing...just like I was there in drab. I then started going to a club that catered to CD/TG. The weekend parties were fun, the shows comical and made lots of friends. I now go to three or four bars and have never had any problems. As where to shop, my favorite is the Goodwill. The clothes are cheap, many are new still with tags, and nobody cares that you are going through the dress or skirt section! Go to the Goodwill that is closest to the upscale part of town. Better fashions. They even have a place to try on the clothes and take them back if there is a problem. Heck, at $4.00 for a dress, if you wear it out once it is still a bargain!

[Sally24]

how does everyone here come up with the courage to go out dressed as a girl..

You have to decide that now is the time! Definitely your number 1 choice would be with a group if there is one nearby. If not, many girls have their first public experience at a convention/event. It's safe and there are plenty of vendors and people who will give you advice.

What is everyone's story? how did you start going out?.

I waited till I was 50 and my children were grown. I had the help and company of my wife so I had it easier than most. You are so blessed to be trying this early in your life! If you take care of your skin at this stage you have a real advantage over many of us who abused our bodies for years.

How can i buy feminine clothing in boy mode without getting weird looks or should i just not care what others think. thanks <3.

I would agree that thrift stores are one of the best choices. You'll have a wide selection, from casual to formal, and the prices can't be beat. Getting to know your sizes without spending alot of money is key. My first time out I started with a frilly top and tight jeans. With the proper padding (homemade foam or store bought pads) jeans can look very convincing and don't involve you baring too much skin. That can come later when you are more comfortable.

Good luck!

[RavenAndrea]

I agree with Amy, Just go 'au natural' with minimal makeup. It makes passing more convincing and if you can moderate and feminize your voice you will likely have a better chance of passing without challenging the sales clerk about your true gender.

[Magickman]

Buying high heels is easy and fun.

Just find a shoe store with styles you like.

Pick a shoe that you want, and ask the sales associate to get a pair in your size. Usually your size in a womens shoe will be one to two sizes larger than your male size.

Then try them on and walk around the store for sat least five minutes, before you buy them.

They sould be a snug fit, but not painfully so, and comfortable to walk in. If they wobble on your feet while you walk, they are too big, or just not quite the shoe for you.

My favorites are stiletto boots with 4" to 5" heels. Women are really impressed if you can dance in them. Leather is much better than man made materials.

The sales people are there to sell shoes. They are really quite helpful, and will not judge you for your selection of footwear.

[TGMarla]

I went out for the first time only about a month ago. After that, the only thing that really keeps me from doing it again is the opportunity to do so. But I took the opportunity, reasoning to myself that I'm not too bad looking, especially from a distance, and I figured that since I had the chance, I might as well take it. I was very meticulous about my makeup, and I went for it. I even drove my little red sports car, reasoning that I might as well go all the way with this. I went to a local transgender meeting, where there would be a group of accepting people, and really had a good time. I wore somthing tasteful, but not over the top. After the meeting, I went with them to a local restaurant and ate. All in all, it was a very successful and memorable outing.

It gave me a lot of confidence. I felt very comfortable being out in public wearing a dress. In fact, I felt normal! Given the chance, I'm going to do it again and again. The odds of you having a problem while doing so are minimal at best, unless you go out of your way to solicit trouble. Good luck with it!

[Cindy J Angel]

well it is hard and your stomck will turn but you can do it. right now i am made up and going out to work in the yard. i love to be out side. have fun. ooo xxx cindy

[TxKimberly]

Well, not much I can add to what the others have already said, except perhaps a warning / word of encouragement.
You may have noticed that more than a few of us older cross dressers expressed envy at your age. Would you like to know why?
At your age, passing is SOOO much easier, because years of living the male life have not yet worked their harsh magic on you.
The bad news is, very few of us had the courage to do it when we were your age, and most of us would give our right leg to go back and try that part of our life again knowing what we know now.

Funny thing though, as you approach your mid 30's to 40's, all of a sudden you no longer have patience with the silly and stupid things in life:

• You no longer care as much that your wearing a dress is not entirely acceptable to society.
• You no longer care as much that someone might laugh at you.
• You know longer care as much what others might think
• You realize that you have let years of fun and freedom go by for no good reason.

So please, take a little advice from an old fart, throw that garbage out now, go put on your makeup and your pretty outfit, and get your ass out into the world. You don't want to get to my age and older and be kicking yourself for wasting years.

I started by literally just peeking out the door.
Months or years later, I got the guts up to actually open the door.
Months or years later, I actually stepped outside the door
Months or years later, with my heart pounding in my chest, I got the guts up to go all the way to my car and go for a drive. Wow what a rush!
Probably the better part of a decade after I peeked out the door, I met a few online friends at a TG friendly club in Austin. It's been all down hill since then! LOL

[Paula Siemen]

I remeber how scarry my first ventures out were. I was in a medium sized town where too many people could recognise me. My first attempts were merly getting dressed in my full fem mode then driving around town, late at night to just get the feel of being out in ladies clothes. I didn't really go out beyond the car (getting out of the car) until I began going to a large city where I was one in a million of other people and know one would reallt take notice. If they did...so what?....who was I to them? The most they could ever say to their friends was, "I saw this guy out the other night and he was dressed like a girL" Its really no big deal! Just becareful where you decide to venture out if you are not in the main stream locations. Take heed of the warnings for your safety listed on this site in another thread. Its better to be "clocked" than clubbed! But that being said, again, if no one knows who you are, then how embarrased can you be? Its just a masquarade, until you become comfortable and can become in your mind and poise the woman that you see yourself as.

So, dress up really pretty; go to a department store; make some selections of ladies clothes that you like; and make your purchases. You will be surprised how helpfull that the sales ladies will be, and if you look like a lady, they will probably let you go to the fitting rooms to try on your selections and will even help you find the right size. For get about being embarrassed, you are not alone and they have probably helped some of us other girls in the past. They likely want to be helpful for you so you will come back and buy more from them so they get thier commission. If they are not at least pleasant, I guarrantee, there is another store around the corner where they will be. Its so much fun going shopping as a girl and we hope you can find this out very soon.

Sisters
Paula

[Sally R.]

For me it was going to Chciago and attending a CGS meeting and going out after with the girls (have done this 3 times) It is a great way to get out without feeling like the whole world is starring at you. If there is a Tri-Ess or other such group near you contact them and see about attending one of their functions. To make it an even better evening treat yourself to a make over if someone is available near you (Rori in Chicago is great).

[AKAMichelle]

GG's have help starting from the day they are born. Moms, sisters and friends all combine to help them with the clothes they wear and the makeup they use. They practice all of the time. By the time they are adults they have it down pretty good.

GG's walk into the store to go shopping and just do it. That's because they have done it for years. They feel no guilt and shop.

This is what CD'er are missing. We haven't practiced our makeup and clothes matching skills for years. Therefore we have to be quick studies. It doesn't mean that we can't do it, but it takes effort on our part. I have shopped for women's clothes for years in drab. I still feel a little uneasy, but I'm not breaking any laws. Earlier this year I decided to venture out en femme. I am spending my time practicing my makeup skills and preparing all the time. By the end of the month, I feel like I will be ready to see the world.

The biggest advice that I can give you is the same advice I give myself. Prepare - Prepare - Just do it! You have the ability to go out and act like you belong there. You just have to go out and see the world too. So just do it and enjoy yourself!

[Electra]

Although I have been CDing for a number of years it was only two weeks ago that I first went out in feminine attire, several times in fact, during the weekend that I spent with a professional dresser who gave me the courage to go out in her company. It was an absolutely divine experience. I think I now have the courage to go out dressed but not alone as yet, I am afraid, and not in my town in any case.

[charlie]

Hello Katie!
The easiest place to shop for all the clothes you need at a cheap price and get zero hassle is the Goodwill. You also can try the clothes on there. Nobody cares. The easiest place to go out dressed for the first time is a gay nightclub. Nobody cares there either. You will get a few people coming over and asking you questions, buying you a drink and some even ask you out (if you are up for that, be careful). Being accepted while dressed is great. getting compliments even better!

[Virginnia]

I did my first outing in the small hours of the morning. I went to my dads grave and on the way back I stopped at a garage to buy a lighter. my frame of mind was to act as normally as possible whitch calmed me down. the cashier made no comment and just served me. as for shopping I just buy what I want and let them think what they want. Good luck on your choices and just be you. X

[tricia_uktv]

Start in a safe place, in a club or hotel. Practice, do it again and again. Then gradually move out into the big wide world. I promise its far easier than you think and once you have done it you will never go back. Good luck

[mainehose]

Katie, I'm like you I have never gone out in public, infact i hace just got the courage to start posting. I guess I am taking baby steps but none the less after reading so many great stories and posts its tough not to gain support and courage. Wish you the best. Hope to hear about your first time out soon.

MaineHose