SO? What's That? (FtM Question)

[CaptLex]

Yes I know it stands for Significant Other. Others prefer the terms Partner or Spouse or something else.

I'm being a bit cheeky because I sometimes get a little envious when I read thread after thread where people mention their better halves (especially those that don't seem to appreciate them). And it seems to me that we - that is, FtMs, Transguys, or other female-bodied-but-not-totally-female persons are less likely to have a significant other. So by a show of hands please, how many of us do have that (however you define it: boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, spouse, etc.) and how many of us don't? I won't do a formal poll 'cause those get messed up real quick in this section. Just want to have a general idea.

Okay so I'll start. I don't have one and I have no prospects on the horizon. It's not that I wouldn't want that in some form - though probably not in the "normal" sense, if there is such a thing (maybe what I want is an insignificant other* ). It's basically that I'm not able to deal with the complexities of being in a relationship (short-term or long-term) - probably due to my trans issues, but probably due to more than that too . . . who knows?

To be clear: I'd like FtMs only to answer the question and the poll, but I'll accept general comments from everyone.

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*Sorry for pirating that

[Cai]

I'm sorta in relationship limbo - I started seeing someone, but we keep missing each other time-wise, and haven't had a conversation in about 3 weeks now. I'm not really sure I'd consider myself in a relationship with him right now.

I'd like to have an SO. I think. The problem is that life gets busy. I don't have much free time during the school year, even on weekends. And because of the school I go to, there's not really anyone there that I'm interested in dating.

[Alan]

Well, there's Ben, of course...

Okay, okay, utterly seriously (sorry, Ben), I don't have someone in my life right now. The guy I mentioned in the 'Children' post was my only possibly serious relationship -- and we never actually 'dated' per se.

My situation, of course, is a bit interesting. In high school, I didn't date for a myriad of reasons. I was then away for a year, teaching in a high school. I was pretty much too young to date any of the teachers (legally, we were fine, but, for example, my closest friend there was 35-6, so it would've been... odd, to say the least) and as a teacher, I couldn't exactly date the students @_@.

There's university now and some hope... /shrug.

I find, though, that I'm not sure I particularly want to date. I mean, I would love to be loved, but dating, with all its trappings... romance, intimacy, sex... I'm not sure I really want that, not right now. Maybe, when I'm more comfortable with who I am and whatnot, I'll be happier dating, but that's a different matter. What I really want isn't a boyfriend or a girlfriend (I'm all about equal opportunity), but a best friend.

One that doesn't want to have sex with me and doesn't even expect it, since that's not the kind of relationship we would have. Hetero life mates or something like that.

Btw, Lex! You changed your pic! /is sad now. I loved the previous one.

[Kieron Andrew]

i think im dating, doesn't answer you well does it lol, i'll tell you after the 9th

[CaptLex]

Hetero life mates or something like that.

I can relate to that . . . well, the "lifemates" part, not the "hetero".

Btw, Lex! You changed your pic! /is sad now. I loved the previous one.

I change it quite often actually, so fear not, Johnny will return at some point. But right now I need to look at something that will help me keep cool in this infernal heat.

i think im dating, doesn't answer you well does it lol, i'll tell you after the 9th

I gotta wait that long to find out?

[Kieron Andrew]

I gotta wait that long to find out?

well so have I!

[CaptLex]

We're a happening bunch . . . the score so far:

Nope - Alan and me
Not sure - Cai and Kieron

[BadassBabyBrother]

I'm currently in a platonic dating/relationship with this one girl. I wouldn't call her a "significant other", but yeah. I'm dating her. Which is surprising considering I'm only interested about men. *shrugs* Ah well, she's nice, so... Oh yeah, and accepting, atleast on the outside, but she came out to me as a lesbian, so I don't know if she actually thinks of me as a man, instead of female. *shudder*

[Alan]

I'm currently in a platonic dating/relationship with this one girl. I wouldn't call her a "significant other", but yeah. I'm dating her. Which is surprising considering I'm only interested about men. *shrugs* Ah well, she's nice, so... Oh yeah, and accepting, atleast on the outside, but she came out to me as a lesbian, so I don't know if she actually thinks of me as a man, instead of female. *shudder*

I once had this major crush on a girl, but she was a lesbian, which is pretty much the only reason I didn't do anything about it. It would've killed me to have her think of me as a girl. /shudder.

[Abraxas]

I have 'others' and I have 'significants,' but the closest I can get to dating (besides being married to Alan) is usually making out with drunk guys at parties. *pout*

Unfortunately, everyone I meet who I might be compatible with sexually, I don't click with emotionally (or is unattainable), and everyone who seems to show a little interest in me is either female, creepy, or (at least on some level) sees me as a girl.

[jsoto81]

I do have a girlfriend, soon to be wife come january 16th.

[Alan]

I do have a girlfriend, soon to be wife come january 16th.

Congrats!!

[RevMoonSerpent]

Well I know you guys have heard me talk about my husband before. As of June 15th we have been married for 6 years.

[halfman_halfamazing]

aww now i feel like a douchebag! =P
as you know, yes i got one of the best girls in the world

[onerous]

I don't have one.. would like to though.. getting desperate o.o

though if i did.. doubt it will interfere much with my studies.. instead it would most probably do the opposite :P

[xTwo_Of_Heartsx]

Other. But I don't feel like explaining.. lol

[Ryan]

Yes I do