Are you ever tempted to go all the way and start living as a woman full time and even possibly consider SRS at some point in the future?
I am often tempted, but i,m not sure if i ever will.
Are you ever tempted to go all the way and start living as a woman full time and even possibly consider SRS at some point in the future?
I am often tempted, but i,m not sure if i ever will.
I'm not sure temptation is the right way to put it. Either your place in TG land is rooted in the TS end of the spectrum or it's not. If you aer TS, then whether or not to transition is something which must be somehow reconciled.
I guess if one identifies with being a CD'er, then temptation to transition may be common. But I'd think that succombing to this would lead to disaster more often than not once the novelty of living full time as a woman wore off.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
The only advice I can give is a personal account.
When I started my Real Life Test the novelty wore off after like a week. The bad parts of being a woman were bothersome, such as always making sure your nails were perfect and clean and taking care of yourself to female standards. And also the mental aspect of living as a TS was starting to take it's toll because the hormones were driving me crazy, making me have worse moodswings than usual and crying alot.
After a few months I started to get better emotionally and thinking more clearly as my mind acclimated to the hormones.
If you're not prepared to loose your male self entirely and can't work through it psychologically then I don't think someone should transition. Even at that time in my life I had friends who were TS and CD that told me maybe full time wasn't for me.
Tempted might be too strong a word but I have of course thought about the idea. Thing is I love my wife and no where in my vows did it say "I will honor my vows . . . until I decide I just 'have to be me' and live life as a woman."
Add to that the fact that we have built a reasonably good life for us that I am not willing to throw away.
Add to that the fact that modern medical science can make us look "more" femme than we do now, but they still fall short of making most 40+ men look like a convincing woman.
Add to that . . . (you get the picture)
Living as woman full time is definitely on my agenda when I can qualify for early reirement. I'm out to my family and friends and I know I can pass as a female. I wouldn't like SRS, but I would love breast implants. Wearing a bra properly? Low cut dresses? Yes please!
I truly belive I should have been born female. But I set my lifes course years ago, and I shall remain male, as long as my spouse will have me.
I've often thought about it, but I love my male life too much. I love the fact that I can go back and forth from male to female.
Of course, when I'm en femme, I don't want to change back! lol But I think that's how everyone is...
My SO did this about four years ago.
She lives as a female full time. As to SRS/hormones she has said that she doesn't feel the need to be a female as most TS's do.
Sandra
Administrator
I always used to rib you about your legs can't anymore. R.I.P Sexy Legs
R.I.P Rianna
I've often thought it would be nice. but it's just a dream for me. hun If there is a way for you to do it and you want it maybe you should go for it Deborah.
Angie
I know i have thought about it, when i was young at times i really want to be a girl but the testosterone would kick in and would wonder what is wrong with me? the desire to be a women is still there stronger on some days than others, i know its something that is hard for us to deal with and to go all the way is a huge steep, sometimes i wonder how different i would be if i had the internet when i was younger to see that i wasn't alone.
Tempted, yes from time to time. But I have no interest in SRS. I like my "in between" status. I can present either as female or male as desire and circumstances permit.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Like so many others, I have considered it, and even longed for it. But ultimately, I will not. SRS and full-time living as a woman is just not in the cards for me. Joy and Kimberly summed it up best for my situation. I really love "being" a woman, but I'm just not going to go through transition and SRS to "become" one.
I know it can be frustrating, Deborah. But coming to grips with who and what we are (in my case, a MTF crossdresser with transexual tendencies who will not be getting a sex-change) can take some time and can be somewhat discouraging at times. I've learned to deal with it.
Any money found in the laundry is MINE!
"This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"
www.flickr.com/photos/tgmarla/
I am thinking about it more and more. Since I have been able to dress when ever I wanted to (apart from work) and now with my wifes blessing I really feel I have found the real me. I have seen my doctor and have been refered the Genger Identity Clinic, now waiting for an appointment.
As for hormones, this may be the way forward but not sure about surgery.
xx
Stevie B
Some people just know from a very early age. I think those of us who just think about it are more on the fence and can only really know if they would be happier by trying to live as one full time.
This Halloween was oddly surreal for me. I have been getting better at makeup and have hair that really helps soften features. I startled several people as they were not expecting my voice when I walked pass them and said hi back to them. A friend even said she kept taking double takes as she would walk back into the room and ask herself who the women is, but then realize that it was me. I went to several parties and got the same reactions, so at this point my confidence has been boosted, though I need to find that female voice, I think probably the hardest part for many of us.
The really interesting part though for me was not feeling anxiety. I felt it when I first came out of the bathroom after dressing at my friends house and they didn't know what I was doing at that point. As they are all very kink friendly it didn't phase them for a second and actually didn't say anything at first. After that intial anxiety I just felt natural and the rest of the night wasn't nervous at all. Actually felt less nervous then in my normal male mode.
So now I know that the only thing holding me back is my voice. I don't know if at this point I would want to go all the way, but I certainly want to practice getting the voice. I know now that I can actually relax out in public, though except for Halloween I would be nervous unless I could create that female voice and once I did I am sure now that I would be totally comfortable.
As I don't live where I am able to practice I will have to practice on the commute to school. If only we could be as lucky as the person on youtube, who has tutorials and can easily switch between the deep male voice and a very natural female voice. You know the one that uses tools to help out...
One last thing is I have found that I no longer feel the need to always do the whole dress up to just wear the clothes. I really like just wearing the blouses and skirts around the house, even in male mode. It is really to bad one can't go out looking totally like a female until one speaks and then get the looks. There would be no question for me that it would be the way that I want to present myself to the world.
Oh the very last thing is I would not take hormones as I do enjoy and like having it. It is probably the one thing that makes me go ok and realize that to someone who truely feels that they should be a women, that it doesn't matter to them about the sexual pleasure. I enjoy my sex drive and from experiences I have read it pretty much gets lost, but for them it is a good thing. Read people transitions and you will get a better idea of how you fit into the TG world, hope this helps.
I guess I'm jsut weird....weird being the conigtative word here since I dress female aside from my gender maleness....
have I thought about being exclusively female???? I guess because I know I am perfectly happen and balenced at adressing my bi gender...(a word that I keep coming back to over other terms that float around here...TG Transvestite, crossdresser et al)....The bottom line si I believe and feel that I have a female side of self and a male side of self. One is the dominant side, my male side, since that's what I've got "down there" and the female side comes out as Stephanie as well as being shaved all over "except" and in dressing femme and having my toes painted 24/7 as a symble of my bi-gender when not dressed as a female....
So this allows me to be perfectly happy with myself and balanced as well....so I must be weird huh????
The older I become, the more I wish I had been born female. I know myself pretty well. Inside, I identify as a male, a sensitive male, but a male nonetheless. I wish I could identify as a female, but in reality I don't. I do identify with females, not as a female, but with females - if that makes any sense.
So, with my very male body and mind, no, I am not tempted. I will have to be satisified with just having my female spirit.
Joni
"Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free" Bob Dylan
Been thinking about this, and my considered opinion is, that were I younger, I would transition. Now I take certain medicaments for typical age-related failings only, which could be difficult for the hormones and so on, to co-operate with.
Since the age of mid-20s I have neither done, nor watched any sport. It seems an awful waste of effort to me! I know almost nothing about car engines or machinery in general.
But I like shopping, colours and clothes, and am very happy to spend time talking about things including feelings, rather than doing energetic pursuits.....and I can cook pretty good too. Could I dressmake? Perhaps, if I applied myself...the answer's Yes!
I suppose I have too much invested in my life as a male. But if my family were just completely ok with it and there were no money concerns and I didn't have have to worry about what other people thought and if surgery were quick and and painless....
Yes. I would do it so fast it would make your head spin.
Becoming a woman is a goal I'll probably never accomplish. Maybe, IU can come out to my family, maybe I could even get to the point that I lived as a woman everywhere but at work...
But the actual surgery might be too far...
But We'll see...
Who Knows what tomorrow may bring......
Stacey
Hi Deborah when I was a kid I would nightly wish to wake the next day as a girl,i remember falling asleep saying over and over " I wish I was a girl". I don't know how my life would be are if I would be happy today if that dream to be a girl come true. But sadly now that I'm alot older it may be I have come to accept and like my male side,and have for to long repressed the female male side of me.Galdly I have found you girls, and I see ( and with you all's help) I'm not going to repress the female side anymore.I think it is best for me to have both worlds and see where this path is going to lead me to.
I'm transitioning currently and I'll definitely say it's not for everyone. I have no doubts that this is what I need to do though.
“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”
-Dr.Seuss
I'm pleased just having my femme side, hidden under hte male side during work hours otherwise femme off hours.
It's a good balance and b/c of life I cannot transition, nor do I really want to - I like my life as it is and I like my body looking like a woman under the clothes, it's for me anyway not for anyone else.
Scottie
You must dare to disassociate yourself from those who would delay your journey... Leave, depart, if not physically, then mentally.
Go your own way, quietly, undramatically, and venture toward trueness at last.
-- Vernon Howard
Living full time as a Woman, is definately in the plans for me, and if all goes well, I hope that will happen within the next year.
If all goes well I hope to start to Transition fully witin 12 to 18 months. SRS in the future depends on wether the doctors will allow. That is my long range plans at present
Denise
Plain and simply..... nope......
I would luv 2 live 24/7 as femme. One day I'll get the nerve to let the real me be shown. It is depressing to hide your true feelings and thoughts.
I would love to of and I think I would of had I realised 40 odd years ago that I wasn't alone out there. Have to be content now as an older lady with meeting and encouraging others.
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