Ahhh! My faith in the CDing community is restored!Originally Posted by Elle1946
Elle, I think this is the smartest thing anyone has said in this tread, and I thank you for it! :D
Ahhh! My faith in the CDing community is restored!
Elle, I think this is the smartest thing anyone has said in this tread, and I thank you for it! :D
Reine
There is and always will be differences between just Crossdressers and those who are transgendered. Now throw GG's and Lesbians into the mix and there is no way for everyone to ever get on the same page with an issue like this.
Reine used the analogy earlier of the term N..word. That is classic of how some people can use it while others cannot. Even Barbara Walters got critizied for even trying to discuss that word with her fellow View cast.
Its time this one rest in peace
Just to put in my two cents: I think the N word in use by African Americans is a case of the appropriation of that which is meant to offend by those who against whom the offense is meant. For example, the gay community appropriating the word "queer" or "fag". It takes away the word's effectiveness by those outside the community and renders it socially unacceptable by the larger society.
An interesting case is something I read about a black musician in one of the Carolinas. For whatever reason, one night while on stage, he started singing the song "Dixie". From then on, he made it a regular piece in his set. I don't remember reading that he experienced anything adverse about it...and he was playing for mostly white audiences in the South.
Wow, everybody has their own opiniun. I think we should leave it that way.
Ah, lest we forget he is a comedian? Could it be I am a part-time female lesbian? Do I have friends that are female gays? What makes Teflon stick? Who know?
Hope I'm not violating etiquette resurrecting a thread already 2 months old, but I felt the urge to chime in.
What does it mean if it turns you on more to go down on a woman than the reverse,
If you prefer sex being executed very lovingly with caressing and kissing
You're not primarily fixated on "getting off"
You think of the sex act as easily a 2-hour affair, with no clear beginning or end, and lots of stops and starts
You simply must know the person and connect on a vibrational / intellectual level before you could have sex with them
You never cared for american sports, AT ALL
Male friends are of very little interest to you, but hanging out with the girls feels perfect
A car (not a truck) was a natural choice for you
You have an impeccable sense of fashion, even when choosing male clothing
The cleanliness of your feet (and every other part of your body, for that matter) was always a natural consideration
You feel wearing women's clothes is the most natural thing in the world
But prefer intimacy with women
And you have a penis?
The phrase "male lesbian" kinda seems to fit how I see myself, even though it's a silly phrase and somewhat self-contradictory.
I walked into a bar one time, sat down next to a beautiful woman and ordered a drink for myself and asked if she would like a drink. She said she would but ," You won't get nothing from me tonight. I'm a lesbian." I pulls back and says," Oh yeah? How's things in Beirut?" The woman says, " You don't know what a lesbian is do you? See that gorgeous lady sitting at the other end of the bar? Well I'd like to take her home with me tonight and tear off her clothes and make love to her all night long!!" So I replied, " Holy Geeeeeezz, I think I'm a lesbian too!!!!"
I guess that makes me a lesbian.
Last edited by jillleanne; 12-17-2011 at 08:08 AM. Reason: typo
Whilst I admire the witty riposte from JilleAnne, it pains me to see the same fallacies being dredged up again. There is no such thing as a male lesbian. The term lesbian refers to a homosexual woman. You cannot be a male woman.
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist :facepalm:
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
If you in your mind look and feel that you are a female and you are attracted to other females then you are so close to being a male liz. your wife or so being a female GG may not have to be a lez. she was and is attracted to a man even if the man wears female clothing just something to think about
WHEN IN STRESS WEAR A DRESS:D
BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF IT ALL YOU GOT
Yeah, it's like saying you're a "woman trapped in a man's body." How absurd!
Agree 100% !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's simply a way for some cross dressers to say they are straight. No matter the outfit.
This has been a very interesting debate over labels of people. Even some therapist can't agree on this either.
I guess I used to be CD until I transition. Now I guess I am a TS who doesn't like guys.
I myself like to called a female because I don't want people to think I am a guy trying to be woman but a woman in a guys body. A birth defect thing.
Bottom line is that I have never had someone ask me what my label was. They either like me or dislike me. I just enjoy being myself.
This flies in the face of everything I have learned about transgenderism.
But I sorta like being a guy, and it would be silly to get rid of a perfectly good penis so I could wear a something else. Why can't I just continue wearing female clothes and having sex with females?
I have thought about it. There is a much wider pool of ladies for me to hook up with as a woman trapped in a male body, and I don't have to tell anyone about it unless I want to. And you never know, I might even find a female lesbian someday who appreciates having a girlfriend with a little extra
Last edited by Nigella; 12-17-2011 at 03:25 PM. Reason: Please read the rules regarding sex toys and appriate words
If you think being transgender is about being a male woman or a female man then you have certainly not been learning from anything I would recognise.
I am not a male woman. I am a woman.
No-one said you can't express your fetish, but please don't confuse your male heterosexual desires with a woman's homosexual desires. You are a man and you like women, that does not make you any form of a lesbian.
So you might be TG though probably not TS, but that still leaves you as a man who wants to preserve his maleness and have relations with women. That does not make you a male woman, neither does it make you a homosexual woman. To use your own words, you are a guy and you like being a guy that does not gel with the claim to be a woman trapped in a male body - which is starting to sound more and more like a cheesy chat-up line.
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist :facepalm:
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
Rianna,
I fully agree with you. The whole idea is absurd.
Julia
Why doesn't it gel with a claim to be a woman trapped in a male? Just because I don't try to pass myself off as a lady, that doesn't mean I wouldn't change if I could have done it from birth. I've just learned to live with and enjoy what I have, while stretching the boundaries as much as I feel I can, and waxing whimsically about what I'll never truly be. I'm not willing to risk alienating my family or friends by trying to tell them I was actually born a girl, so I live my life within it's boundaries. At the same time, my life as a male has left me jaded towards men in general. Even if i were sexually attracted, I don't think I could put up with a great deal of male behavior. If I were reborn a lady, having experienced my life so far, I would either be looking for a somewhat dominant, yet pretty girl, or be looking for a guy who wanted express his more feminine mannerisms and mindset.
I think most would agree that the as yet not fully explained and sometimes unscientific nature of what is known about gender assignment still has some uncharted territory to explore. It certainly isn't worth a prolonged argument, and I'm not going to say I'm an expert. As for any of my own gender confusion, I realize I was born a man, and long ago I decided I can live with that. I certainly wouldn't want to remove anything so I could officially proclaim myself a lesbian.
I find this particular thread to be fascinating to me. Our society is so purely entrenched in the concept of a two gendered world, that even a group of people that blur those lines, (and a few that are actually physiologically two genders) can't wrap our minds around the concept that more than two genders can exist. The concept of a "male lesbian" is of course a silly term that was meant to be comical (clearly the attempt at humor is lost here) but nonetheless, we see evidence of people that are between genders all the time. Whether they be inter-sexed and carry the physical traits of both genders, or they are ts and carry the mental capacity of a female and the physiological aspects of a male. So, by the reality of this, and I'm not talking about this nonsensical I'm a ts and thus I'm a woman not a man. (NO! You still have a Y chromosome, and thus will always on a cellular level be physiologically a male, no matter how many surgeries or hormones you take.) Medical science isn't nearly advanced enough to make someone wholly one gender or the other. So in a very real sense this absurd title of "male lesbian" will in a way, fit. Nobody will like that, but that's what the reality is. The rest of the debate here is based purely on emotional feelings, and not scientific fact. I personally recommend writing it off as poor humor and don't think too hard about it, because when you look at it objectively you may get answers to things that make you feel uncomfortable, such as your actual gender(s).
It means you are a very sensitive male lover, hence not a lesbian.
Then she wouldn't be a lesbian.
I agree. Our concept of gender and sexual variance has widened since the old days when there were just hetero, gay, or lesbian people. We do need more terms to account for M2F CDs or TSs attracted to women. Perhaps transbian (a word I've seen here and there) would be more accurate.
Or maybe we could dispense with those labels altogether, and simply all say we are either male-attracted (androphile), or female-attracted (gynephile), or trans attracted (transophile?).
But, the definition of "lesbian" is "a female who is same-sex attracted". This just doesn't describe a male who either fully or partially identifies as a woman, who is attracted to women.
However, there are CDs who like to fantasize they are lesbians, and since none of us can agree or disagree with someone else's fantasy, no one can object to a CD saying, "I like to fantasize that I am a lesbian (although I know that I am not)".
On that note, I'm closing this thread. No one wants to read through 6 pages again. We were a bit behind with closing the older threads, else it would not have been revived. If anyone wants to start up the discussion again, please start a new thread.
Reine
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