My path to acceptance started about eleven years ago, but it wasn't always easy and guilt-free. I always knew there was something different about me, but I was too afraid for the longest time to even consider the word transgendered. Those thoughts would surface, then be stuffed back into the deep recesses of my conciousnes, just as quickly. I tried to maintain like that, compartmentalized for many years. I found myself experiencing gender dissonance, but I didn't, or was perhaps not willing to acknowledge what it was. I just knew that the feelings were increasing in both frequency and intensity.
It wasn't until last August that I experienced what was the strongest, most disorienting dysphoria I had ever known, and it freaked me out. Lasted damn near the whole month, too. It was like a deluge of feelings that I'd suspected we're there, plus some other feelings that I wasn't immediately prepared to process. But the more I thought about it, the more everything made sense. It was like I was finally getting to know myself. The most shocking thing? How right it felt to admit to myself that I am transgendered. I still deal with dysphoria but at least now I know what my deal is. The weight is gone and I feel much more happy and sure of myself. The only thing that is still in question is how far will all of this go? I don't know but I'm going to try my hardest to enjoy the ride.
TL/DR; Admitting to myself that I'm TG has given me an inner peace and confidence that was never there before.
