First (Big) Step to Gender Therapy and support

[Teresa]

Ilene,
It's a case of what you feel is right, this forum and the support group can give a different perspective on things , maybe something that never occured to you . Please don't feel brow beaten by anyone, I felt recently that I had gone from wearing a male straightjcaket to wearing a female one , not only were some members giving comments that I felt had no bearing to members in my social group telling what I should and shouldn't do when dressed . If we want to transition we must find ourselves and not base our future on other people's ideals .

I'm going to give a different perspective to the comment about you wife earning certain rights, the way it's written suggests you are giving up or prepared to give up all your rights . You have earned that for yourself as much as anyone why do you have to relinquish it ? You have earned the right to be you if that means accepting Ilene is part of your life then so be it . I personally feel you will fall into the same sitaution as me, full transition isn't on the cards for many reasons , which means your wife does not have to accept the inevitable that you will become a woman . So she isn't going to lose the man she knew for all those years , he may appear somewaht different be he'll still be there for her . I have to accept that is my situation at the moment even though we've separated , I know it's early days and I have to wean my wife off the support she still expects but then she has the ace cards of our children and grandchildren .

In your heart of hearts I know you do realise the true path , it isn't a easy one to take in your circumstances but at the end of the day you will look back and realise it wasn't so bad . To some you will still be the old tough guy to others you will be Ilene you have to find that balance , so keep going to these meetings they will do no harm .