My wife in the past has brought up stuff of my appearance to my attention and believes I don't really closely look at myself when I dress and that I see something else when I'm dressed.
I took the day off yesterday to drive my wife to her specialist appointment because it's about an hour and a half drive. Usally the first highway stop I get changed and drive there and back dressed.
We were done with her doctor and thank goodness everything was good and I needed gas. I asked my wife if she wanted to gas up the car or if it was ok for me to. I feel it's always good to let them make the decision, with most women what's good yesterday isn't always good today. She suggested she gets cold drinks inside and I gas up the car. When we got back in the car she automatically asked me about my appearance and why I didn't notice the bulge in my private area and is that the way I want to present myself and what do other crossdresser do about this. I usally wear wrap dresses or dresses that fall more loose but I was wearing a summer dress she just bought me for the drive and it was that stretchy elastic material and it was a tight fit. In my defence I told her because I got changed in the car and when I got out of the car to gas up I was paying more attention to my surroundings and I did look down at my feet a few times in disbelief that I was actually out and I didn't notice the bulge.
I told her about tucking and maybe I should start paying more attention to myself when I do go out in public.
She then made a point of technically I'm not trying to present myself as a women and not for me to take it personal but I pass as a women a little, so technically I'm a crossdresser and crossdressers are men and have private parts. So in her point of view she believes that I present as a crossdresser and it is fine if my bulge is showing because everyone knows I'm a man. I made the point of if she thought since presenting as a crossdresser it should then be ok for chest and leg hair to show or have a beard. In her opinion if a person is trying to present as a women it's one thing but if there presenting as a crossdresser its up to the individual how they choose to present themselves and she asked me were I believe I am.
I told her even if I do barely pass I do try my best to present as a women, and in my opinion I should have paid more attention to my bulge just the same way I pay attention to my chest and leg hairs and everything else.
I apologized if I embarrassed her but I do appreciate talking openly and having a open communication with her. I told her I'm going to ask this question to the community and see how they feel about her technical theory of presenting as a crossdresser or a women.