I know this may seem stupid, but what is VS?Originally Posted by Pamela Julie
Here's to your future Michelle! May you find that supportive, compassionate woman we all wish we had, and some of us do have. Where is the divorce reception party being held? Are you listed at VS?
Pamela
Last edited by AKAMichelle; 05-20-2008 at 12:03 AM.
The key to the decision is that if I give her what she wants in money then she leaves my business alone. Plus she leaves sooner and I can begin having a life. I have made a lot of money in my life. I have gone broke 2 times before and rebuilt every time. Each time I end up better than before. This will be #3. Third time is the charm.I now get to be my own boss at home and in business.
Plus when you have kids still at home you have to do the right thing for them as well. You can't punish them for being born. I will continue to support my youngest and the older 2 which are grown. Being the head of the family requires me to stand up and take care of them. It doesn't mean that I have to stay miserable forever though.
My wife has a way of making me feel very alone and depressed when we fight. That has always helped to keep me in my chains. This weekend something happened. I decided that I must finish this. Regardless of the cost. When I finally decided not to back down, a huge load came off my back. Now I have something to look forward to. F-R-E-E-D-O-M
After I get the divorce finished, I am going to take some time off to discover myself again. No GG's invited. :D
Michelle, I too have gone thru a similar experience. I told my ex wife of 15 years about the cd side of me and it resulted in divorce. I hid this part of me for all those years and could not live that life any longer so I told her. I thought we had a good marriage and she would understand and accept this part of me. I was wrong. She was convinced that I must be gay and did not want anything to do with me from that day on. By telling her of my cd side I learned that she was not the person that I thought she was for 15 years. That was 13 years ago and I am a much happier person now. I think back now and realize I wasted 15 years of my life with someone I really did not know. It is a shame but I have learned from the experience and live a much better life now. I hope things improve for you and you can find happiness in your life.
Michelle, I like you ended a maririage after 30+yrs not because of my dressing (I had been doing that for years in secret) but as you say it was dead, I decided almost imeadiatly to find someone else and DID! All I had to do was place an add in my local paper for finding a partner, the catch were the words "To help with my feminine side"
My phone never stoped ringing! which proves your wife wrong, unless they were all "feaks" of course, I met and now live with a loverly lady who loves Katie, maybe more than Colin (me as a man) So take hart "they are out there" Best of luck, Katie, X
AKAMichelle said...
VS = Victoria Secrets.I know this may seem stupid, but what is VS?
Michelle,
So sorry to hear your going through all of this, but remember when one door closes, another one opens. I darn near lost everything in my marriage too about a year a go, and we are still hanging on by a thread. When my wife found out she swore up and down that I was an abomination to the Lord.
What I've since figured out is that I'm not going to burn anywhere, and God isn't going to turn me away because I'm gender gifted, and I'm the one that had to come to terms with it all. As far as I know I've never violated any of the Commandments in doing this, and are we not supposed to be accepted unconditionally. Some people in this world will never open their eyes to that fact, and will always point fingers and accuse those of us who don't fit their definition of normal, whatever that may be.
Christy
Michelle-I'm very sorry to hear about your divorceDon't worry, there are plenty of accepting GGs. You will find what you are looking for. Now , take a road trip & have some fun!!!:drink:
"Wife Says no woman will ever accept my crossdressing"
WOW.. if that statement is not on made in ignorance I don't know what is. There are MANY GGs out there who would love to date/get involved with/marry a man that crossdresses. Granted, it took me 4 tries to get it right and find the one that accepts, understands, and participates in my dressing, but I did finally find one for myself.
Best of luck to you hon.
Kandis
Someone once told me "Put on Your big girl panties and deal with it". If they only knew, I WAS ALREADY WEARING THEM.
I wear the bras and panties so my wife doesn't have to.
WARNING:Any institutions or individuals using this site or any of its associated sites for studies , projects or any other reasons You DO NOT have permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. If you have or do, it will be considered a violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
Just read this forum. It is evident that many SO's accept their CDs. My SO accepts, supports, encourages and participates. And probably understands SusanMarie better than I do. As my SO said to me when I was 'coming to terms' with my issues. Be honest with yourself and it will work out.
No closet is big enough!
Sounds like one last jab. Like saying I was the besting for you. You will never find any one as good as me.
Sorry this is happening to you Michelle but I think you will be happy and at Peace and I'm sure you can find someone accepting to be with. Hang in there hun. and we are here if you need to vent or want to talk.
Angie
Congratulations,your free to establish your own ground rules,if others choose not to acknowledge them then they can walk.I think its wonderful to share but being happy shouldn't be dependent on it,so even if you don't find someone accepting right away,you can still enjoy your freedom and rebuild.
I completely realize how a divorce can effect one's feelings of self image & confuse numerous issues. Let me tell you what I think I am hearing...your wife has a huge history with you and knows exactly how to get what she wants by pushing the exactly perfect buttons. You, in turn most likely, are reacting to her as she has come to expect. The task at hand here is for you to become able to step out of your dance with her and make choices for the future that are...I hate to say this..."All About YOU!!" And I am referring to your business, finiances, relationship with your children & ability to function as a self respecting person after all this mess is over with. Doing that is the only way you will be able to be the best person for your kids and everything that you wish for yourself in this world.
Here is something to think about very deeply...If your wife wants out why is she so invested in making you feel miserable? Why is she talking down to you in such a disrespectful way? Why, especially if she believes she is going to take you to the cleaners, does she really give a crap? There is an answer here that only you can figure out.
One more thing...It won't matter one bit if you stand up to her...you are alreadying getting hit with both barrels & I assure you...Her sting won't "FEEL" a bit differn't if you do what is best for you and speak up. Think about it...hanging your head and doing what she wants has never pleased her has it???
She derives psychic income from demeaning you and keeping you in your place ...so she gets what she wants. (Think about what she really wants right now???...scarry isn't it?) The CD thing is just a tiny addition to her weapons that she uses against you.
Let me say this and then get off my soap box...If you don't stand up for yourself right now I suspect that she will continue to think she can nag you even after your divorce. You won't get the respect that you desire from your kids and your feminine persona will never blossom into it's fullest.
ahhh hummmmm...of course my comments have all been "Just my opinion" ...and I have no facts regarding this situation to have it be otherwise.....
(((((Huggs)))))))))
Linda
I think that your wife is just messing with you. She knows you well enough to get to you.
Dana Ryan
That is exactly what she is doing. She doesn't necessarily want a divorce but she wants me to act and behave the way she says. This is how it has been for a very long time. That's why she told me that their isn't a woman out there that will accept my crossdressing. Then she pulled out crossdressing is a sin. I know she will find something else so she can regain control of the situation. Maybe trying to turn the boys against me. Even if she tries and succeeds, it won't last. They will eventually remember they have a father.
Tonight we went looking for a place for her to live. I can tell that it hit her very hard tonight. When we brought the checkbook, she reminded me that I would have to open my own checking account. Then she heard the words she didn't expect. I already had gotten one and a new credit card in just my name. Then she kept acting like you just aren't going to let me go. You will come around. She is still in denial.
The hardest part for me is not going back. There is a lot of history here. Good Times and Bad Times. It will be hard to stick to this, but it is something that I must finish. If I go back and she agrees to change, it will only be temporary. She will revert back to her normal behavior within a few months and I will be trapped again. This roller coaster has to stop sometime so I can get off. :D
Michelle
It's funny how someone that you love and trust can you hurt you so deeply.
:ire:Merry
HRT since 2009
She is a bitch. Make sure you take her to the cleaners... and clean her out good! :2c::drink:
Women accepting crossdressing
Hi Michelle, I have been married for thirty years my wife knew about my crossdressing right from the start. We shop for femme clothing together, I dress just about every day. We shop for makeup together. My wife buy's panties and bra's and garter belts for me. She has always been very supportive of me as Cathy. Yes I know I am very lucky to have this wonderful woman. I think there are many women out there that accept crossdressing.
She will revert back to her normal behavior within a few months and I will be trapped again. This roller coaster has to stop sometime so I can get off.
Sounds like you know her better than she really knows you!
Good for you, Michelle!
Keep your courage up, dear one. You've already had more than your share of being mentally abused and intimidated.
I think you should respell your title to:
No narrow-minded woman will ever accept crossdressing.
There are women that don't mind. Just read some other threads of happiness.
As to where to find one, I can not advise as I am single myself.
Hope the future is bright for you.
Whenever I have worn a skirt in male mode, there have never been any issues at all.
I was afraid that my wife would reject my CDing when I told her about a year ago, but she tolerated it as long as she did not see me fully dressed. Then about a month ago she accidently saw me dressed and deceide it was not as bas as she thought and now accepts my CDing.
So there are women out there that will accept your CDing. A friend of mine got devoriced over his CDing and was of the same mind as your wife. He then he started dating a GG and told her he was a CDer and she accepted it. They go out together with him dressed.
Here's an accepting GG sending you hugs!
Find me on Facebook. I'm Princess Pink!
