If the boat has some leaks in it, but you are bailing the water out fast enough and is still floating it is best not to rock it. What I'm trying to say is no relationship is perfect and life is complex so to say it is a good thing to out yourself to your wife may be bad advice. The advice to do it slow is good. My take on the honesty angle, is I intend to tell her, I just haven't found a good way or had enough time yet. You have to know what you want to tell her also... feel her out...next time you see someone in drag tell your wife it looks like fun and you are going to try it and see what she says.
