Embarassment and Self-Acceptance

[Katie Boundary]

Dear all,

thank you so much for your encouraging words! Although I have some way to go, I feel much happier about things now.

Clarissa

[Emily Anderson]

Katie,

I know exactly what you are talking about, because I was in a relationship with a girl who didn't mind what I wore at any time or any place. The only problem was, I minded what I wore, and didn't want to be outed to friends, colleagues etc.

So, even while she was cool about it, I didn't feel comfortable... And I ended up leaving her because she was too cool about anything... She would have accepted me, even if I was an axe-murderer!

[DonnaT]

Sounds like two issues going on. The first being self acceptance, and the second being uncomfortable when seen enfemme by your SO.

Both are mindsets, and thus you need to retrain your mind to overcome both issues.

Quite possibly the two issues are based on one thought --not being manly--. If so, then let me ask you this, what does being manly mean to you? Does dressing up make you weaker? Does it make you scared? If you would not normally run away from a fight, would you act different just because you have on a skirt? If you (NOTE: examples, not because they are only manly pursuits) fix cars, fish, hunt, play football, baseball, do you forget how just because you wear a skirt? Is there some reason you need to feel manly or prove your a man?

For me, I'm still me no matter what I'm wearing.