Crossdressing a lifestyle choice or genetic?

[Stephanie Scott]

There are likely a variety of factors, including some genetic perhaps, which contribute to the desire or feeling of "bi-genderedness."

That being said, the decision of what to do with that desire is just that -- a decision or choice. Generally speaking, nobody holds a gun to our heads and makes us put on bras and panties. (Obviously, there are cases of childhood trauma and actual "forced-feminization," but I believe that is a tiny exception to the vast majority). To suggest that dressing or acting as the other gender is fait accompli because of genetics infantilizes us and suggests that we are powerless to resist.

There are many things to which we might be "genetically predisposed." That doesn't make it right or moral, though. The question is whether we are genetically predisposed to do something right, wrong, or neutral. (For example, many alcoholics are predisposed genetically to alcoholism, so we don't want to hand them drinks saying they were "born that way and can't help it.")

Crossdressing, in my view, is morally neutral. We give it its moral content by what we do with it.

[Anna the Dub]

Yes, I do see you point. Perhaps, as you say, I did have a predisposition to femininity, and this coupled with my upbringing led to my gender dysphoria. My earliest memories, though, are of wishing I was a girl. I pretty much do not remember a lot from the age of 4 or so, but I do remember that. I also remember feeling very alone and needing love, which I didn't get (none of us did). I know that my Mother can be a cold, hard unforgiving person, who can also be quite cruel. My brothers (and sister) seem to have been unaffected by their respective childhoods, I , however, am emotionally scarred.

[Miss Tessa]

I think that since being TG is a rainbow, a spectrum.

And this means that even the label 'CD' has many different types of CD's with differences in motivation.

[BrianaMarie]

Being a GG, sister of a gay brother and associated with many gay friends.... in my opinion,it's genetic. Not putting the "Gay" stamp on anyone who crossdresses, but the "feeling" and "desire" to crossdress seems to be embedded. In my opinion if it was truly a choice and cross dressing causes so many of you issues in your personal life then you would simply stop and/or not do it. Most of us know that's not possible and that desire seems to override that choice. Why fight it? If it was as simplistic as a "choice" to live this lifestyle, to choose to dress and take on all of the emotional and physical ramifications that come along with it then why would anyone make that choice? I don't believe for one minute that we wake up Gay, or we wake up one day straight, so how would you simply wake up one day and say I'm going to wear a skirt and some pantyhose today. Wether you have always dressed, dressed as a child or waited until you were an adult I would have to imagine that that feeling, desire and thought has always been present. It would seem to be a matter of your environment and how comfortable you are with your surroundings and yourself to express your true feelings. Kudos to all of you who have found yourselves and embrace your genetic disposition!! Raid the closets girls, genetic or not...its your life get to living it!!!

[Ema1234 GG]

I think it's also important to point out that behavioural traits that are purely genetic are extremely uncommon. Whilst many may have a basis in genetic factors the behaviour is also influenced (to a greater or lesser extent) by environmental stimuli.

I think a good example (and non topical!) which may help to illustrate this is the Herring Gull.

Herring Gull adults have a red spot on their beaks during the breading season. When this is pecked by the chick it encourages the adult to regurgitate food. When Herring Gull chicks hatch they have an instinctive (genetic) behaviour to peck at anything red. In trials they will peck at anything regardless of shape or size, so long as it is red. If this trial is repeated in older chicks they commonly ignore other red objects. Why? Because the original instinctive (genetic) behaviour has been modified through learning.

The whole concept of clothing, make up etc etc is a relatively modern (geneteically speaking) invention. It is highly unlikely that anyone is genetically predisposed to wear female clothing as such, no one is genetically predisposed to wear any clothing as it's a human construct. As a result any genetic or congenital influence on cross dressing is far more likely to be towards an aspect of femininity and through learning this is transferred onto objects such as clothing or make up.

[renee k]

While I do believe nature, genetics if you will has something to do with why we desire to dress as the opposite sex. In my opinion, being nurtured by your parents is a bigger factor. For example, I was an only child, my mother had to take hormones to get the pregnancy going. Possibly effecting me. As for the nurture part. My father was away from home alot, so me not having a father figure around. Plus my mother would let me wear her shoes around the house and dressed me as girl for halloween on a couple occasions when I was little. Plus giving me lots of help and encouragement when I was in my teens to dress for halloween, not to mention putting a blind eye on my visits to her closet. Sure helped things along. So for me, this was a learned and encouraged behavior that's been with me all my life. Over time I have wished I could transition, but I don't want to upset the applecart as far family and career goes. So I'm happy where I'm at, enjoying the clothes, hair and makeup, that go with being a woman.

Huggs, Renee

[Jonianne]

Nature or nurture. It probably is a combination of both, varying degrees to different CDers.

I believe people, if left alone, will gravitate to where they get their needs met.

Some male children will prefer playing with females and female things. And visa versa. Some will be happy with both.

However, society has very much an interfering effect on our natural upbringing. I hate it when I see a parent snatch a doll from a male child's hands and threatens him not to touch it again. That will screw us up far more than what they think boys playing with dolls does.

[Annie D]

The cause of any behavior is constantly questioned and I am like everyone else when I have asked these same questions about and to myself.

Most of us started experimenting at an early age, sneaking into a sister's or mother's bedroom and trying on various articles of clothing. For me, yes, there was a sexual gratification involved. Was I genetically bound to become a crossdresser? I would like to think such, in that way I could absolve myself from this type of behavior.

I spent various times in my life abstaining from dressing, purging, buying, purging, buying but in the end I always came back to my favorite way to dress. Thoughts of transitioning and sex change entered my mind but if I thought I had degenerate behavior wearing women's clothes, the thought of being with a man was even more unacceptable to me. As I have aged, neither the thought of wearing women's clothing nor being with a man hold the same level of distaste. Although, I have never been with a man, I do not find it repulsive at all. I am and have been monogomous for some time and do not intend to change that relationship in the future. I have come to accept my crossdressing as a part of my personality and I have come to realize that whatever someone's sexual preference, it is entirely their business and they have the right to have a happy relationship with whomever they want.

Perhaps I was destined to be a crossdresser at birth, I have given it up for long periods of time but have always returned. I am content and comfortable wearing a skirt, heels, pretty tops and doing my makeup and I choose to do so, even if mother nature made me do it.

[Tomara]

I also believe like so many other things in our lives that genetics plays a major role in who we are and what we do.
I know when I put on my sisters bra at the age of 6 years old that no one told me to , and no one said it would feel so good , it was already in me .
Tomara

[Sallee]

Who would chose to be a cross dresser. How many of us have tried to quit and lived in agony over it. It would be like choosing to beat ourselves up. We do that to It is definitely NOT choice.

[angelcd23]

I feel that this is just the way I am , I don't think i would have just chosen to do it . I am not gay, but I just love to dress up and wear pretty things and look like a woman.

[ElaineB]

If CD/TG is in the genes then it must be hereditary and there are family patterns we could spot. Has anybody studied these and found convincing evidence for them? Until they have, any talk of it being genetic is just more chatter.

Is it congenital? Are we predisposed to CDing or TGism because of some congenital condition? I do not know, but ... Despite the flames it attracted, the "man-gina" thread was quite an interesting and rewarding read because it showed that a lot of CDers really do have umm... "less manhood". So I cannot rule out such theories.

[RavenAndrea]

[SIZE="4"]I think the reason for so many classifications for terms like cross-dressers, transvestites and transgendered is because of nature/nurture. I know I am a transgendered (TG) woman because I know inside I really am one. I was unfortunately born with male genitalia. I don't get any thrill from wearing my woman's wardrobe, although like any GG, I feel good if I know I have a hot outfit on and my makeup is looking great.

Andrea[/SIZE]

[deja true]

...neither the thought of wearing women's clothing nor being with a man hold the same level of distaste. Although, I have never been with a man, I do not find it repulsive at all.... and I have come to realize that whatever someone's sexual preference, it is entirely their business and they have the right to have a happy relationship with whomever they want....

As a little aside...this is probably one of the very best of blessings that can be associated with our predeliction.

Self acceptance must lead to the acceptance of others. And that softening and rejection of prejudices carries through not just to gender variabilities but to color, race, religion, social class and on and on...

We're on the very outside of socially acceptable behaviours and this very "outsider-ness" makes us more able to see the value of all of god's children.

[kiyohchan21]

I think it's a lifestyle choice in my opinion.

[KarenSusan]

I'm a lifelong crossdresser. I love dressing like a girl. I did not choose to be this way. I am not a sissy! I feel this is a part of my genetics and had I not had been born with this I would not dress. To me it's simple. I don't believe crossdressers choose to live like this. I believe we are born as crossdressers!

I agree with that exactly, Emmi

[Deidra Cowen]

Count me in the we are are born with this as opposed to it being lifestyle. Not sure if it is genetic or maybe some theory I heard where MtF transfolk for example maybe were exposed to fem hormones in the womb. But I do think those brain scans that show MtF look closer to Female brains than Male is very interesting and is a clue that it is biological in nature.

Lifestyle??? Gawd honestly if I could be a manly man and in my case straight...would be much easier way to live life most of the time. Being a CD has a lot of fun moments...but its a lonely road much of the time.

But when I try to quit I get depressed and before you know it I dress up again!

[AmandaM]

I am as capable of resisting it as a gay guy is capable of resisting his attraction to men.

There are likely a variety of factors, including some genetic perhaps, which contribute to the desire or feeling of "bi-genderedness."

That being said, the decision of what to do with that desire is just that -- a decision or choice. Generally speaking, nobody holds a gun to our heads and makes us put on bras and panties. (Obviously, there are cases of childhood trauma and actual "forced-feminization," but I believe that is a tiny exception to the vast majority). To suggest that dressing or acting as the other gender is fait accompli because of genetics infantilizes us and suggests that we are powerless to resist.

There are many things to which we might be "genetically predisposed." That doesn't make it right or moral, though. The question is whether we are genetically predisposed to do something right, wrong, or neutral. (For example, many alcoholics are predisposed genetically to alcoholism, so we don't want to hand them drinks saying they were "born that way and can't help it.")

Crossdressing, in my view, is morally neutral. We give it its moral content by what we do with it.

[renee k]

Count me in the we are are born with this as opposed to it being lifestyle. Not sure if it is genetic or maybe some theory I heard where MtF transfolk for example maybe were exposed to fem hormones in the womb. But I do think those brain scans that show MtF look closer to Female brains than Male is very interesting and is a clue that it is biological in nature.

Lifestyle??? Gawd honestly if I could be a manly man and in my case straight...would be much easier way to live life most of the time. Being a CD has a lot of fun moments...but its a lonely road much of the time.

But when I try to quit I get depressed and before you know it I dress up again!

Deidra,

Your spot on with your assesment, I totally agree with you.

Renee

[sometimes_miss]

Stephanie Scott wrote: There are likely a variety of factors, including some genetic perhaps, which contribute to the desire or feeling of "bi-genderedness." That being said, the decision of what to do with that desire is just that -- a decision or choice.

Yes. But you forgot to factor in how much influence genetic and other forces 'guide' our 'choice'. Sure, I could stop crossdressing, but I'd be a basket case pretty quick. The longer I go without being 'Lexi', the shorter my attention span gets, I get short tempered, my memory starts to go, my sleeping patterns become more erratic, and probably other symptoms that I don't notice because I just feel plain miserable all the time. The constant feeling that I'm in the wrong clothes gets more and more annoying, like an itch that you can't scratch, until it's almost the only thing on my mind. Lets say it's like being on a diet; stop eating altogether and see how much, and how quickly you focus on getting something to eat. The hunger to crossdress is the same way for me...and I suppose, many others as well.

Jonianne said: people, if left alone, will gravitate to where they get their needs met

But which needs become primary? And how does that influence our self image? My primary need wasn't to feel 'normal as a girl'. I was a child starved of affection and of any friendships, offered it by a child abuser, eventually in exchange for sexual behavior. The concept that I was a girl was impressed upon me daily, over and over until it 'stuck'. And when you do that to someone during certain phases of development, it appears to be stronger in shaping self identity than at, perhaps later parts of life. Once convinced, I even became a contributer to my own confusion, adopting observed female behavior and feelings as my own because I thought that was what I was supposed to be.

ElaineB wrote: If CD/TG is in the genes then it must be hereditary and there are family patterns we could spot. Has anybody studied these and found convincing evidence for them? Until they have, any talk of it being genetic is just more chatter.

Not all influences are blatant. Many are quite subtle, and aren't going to show up under casual observation. Example: We know for certain that you can breed animals for temperment. Exactly which genes are involved aren't always so obvious, but you can do it. Other genetic combinations are more likely to influence the individual towards addictive behavior. Knowing that, there are other combinations of genes that will be more likely to steer us towards other behaviors, such as, transgenderism. DNA being the most complicated molecule on the face of the earth, it's the ultimate in arrogance to assume we know everything about how it works. But we're learning.

kiyohchan21 wrote: I think it's a lifestyle choice in my opinion.

Then for you, maybe it is.

AmandaM wrote: I am as capable of resisting it as a gay guy is capable of resisting his attraction to men.

Perhaps a better analogy for the GG crowd here would be 'I am as capable of resisting it as a straight woman is capable of resisting her attraction to men'. Too many 'normal' straight folks believe we 'decided' to be what we are. It's important that they understand how strong the drive is in us to feel, dress, and sometimes behave as female.

Deidra Cowan wrote: brain scans that show MtF look closer to Female brains than Male

The problem is limited sample size, and of course it is unknown how many people scanned weren't open about, or perhaps subconsciously suppressed their gender identity feelings in order to be normal. Lots of people occasionally experience, or act in ways not in perfect alignment with their born gender. How much of that is influenced by genetics or physiology we don't know.

I think the biggest mistake we can make is to assume there is only one cause for this. There are other influences on us as well, as we feel any guilt or shame we seek external causes so that we are to escape those feelings, one reason many of us hope for a purely genetic cause to show up somewhere. Why does one child prefer grape juice while another prefers orange? They're too young to have made 'informed' choices. It's the same with so many other things. We're genetically influenced towards certain things, some more strongly than others, to what degree, well, it's different for all of us. Then we're raised with other influences as well, and you wind up with an adult who is the result of all that.

[Schatten Lupus]

I see it as both really. The urges are natural, and probably is genetic, but it really is a choice to crossdress, and for me, to transition. It's not like it's gonna kill me if I don't, or someone is holding a gun to my head to make me or not.

[Karren H]

I have not clue.... I'm driven to dress......

[ErikaLadyoftheDesert]

I like Paula above was thought to be a girl before I was born and was given a girly name in the womb. I have early memories of wanting to cross-dress and my mother even "encouraged" me to dress up as Wonder-Woman when I was ealry teenage. Till this day that was one of the greatest days in my life!

[Nicki B]

I think it's also important to point out that behavioural traits that are purely genetic are extremely uncommon. Whilst many may have a basis in genetic factors the behaviour is also influenced (to a greater or lesser extent) by environmental stimuli.

Um... Ema, I'm left-handed. How was that stimulated environmentally? ~10% of the population is wired the same way.

Perhaps one of the reasons many of us stick firmly with genetics is that so many people outside this community assume it's a choice - whereas the vast majority of us have spent many years trying not to be like this and failing?

Self acceptance must lead to the acceptance of others.

Oh, Deja.... If only t'were true.

[Kerrylee61]

I feel as though I don't have a choice. Depression and anxiety are the door prizes of resistance.

Diddo for me

Kerry Lee