Going Cold turkey

[CD Susan]

Comparing quitting smoking and quitting cd'ing is not a valid comparison. They are two completely different situations. Being addicted to tobacco can be cured, millions of people have done it. There is no cure for cd'ing! It is something that is part of our nature and will be with us for life. Those that make claims that they can quit are only fooling themselves. If that is true then what are they doing on this forum? I think it is safe to assume that most of us here have tried to quit before and possibly numerous times and we are all still here and relating to others that are like us. Some of us here need to face the reality of this.

[JenJenNumber9]

This is far more realistic. Try to get dressed once a week or every other day or once a month or twice a year or whatever works best for you and try to discipline yourself to stick to that more or less.

This may be easier to do if you get at least partly out of the closet. For example, if I go through the effort of getting pretty, I'm gonna walk out that door. The idea of getting pretty and not being with people no longer holds any appeal to me. Because of this, the time it takes to get ready, and my busy life, I have trouble finding time to CD rather than trying to stop CDing so much. And make no mistake about it : I love getting girly.

Hmmm. I think I need a personal assistant or something.

Good luck.

[Alisha Dayle]

i think the first thing to quitting anything is the true desire to or the real distaste in what it does to you, so if you really want to quit and are not feeling forced to in some way then in my opinion you are not a true cd, also it is not a habbit its part of you such the same as talents and other drives and desires that make you who you are, other example would be a hetro male who craves women sure he can quit having sex but he will still want it and his sexuality does not change because he's not having sex. thats part of my opinion anyway on this subject

Your friend

Alisha

[Jessinthesprings]

[SIZE="4"][SIZE="3"][SIZE="4"]Hi everyone,

Is it possible to quit crossdressing by going "cold turkey" like you would when you quit smoking? If people quit smoking and don't miss it at all why can't you quit crossdressing and not miss that at all?

Thanks,

Robyn:brolleyes:[/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE]

I don't think CDing is an addiction. If anything its a compulsion. Like OCD or what not.

[Annemarie]

You can quit crossdressing but you can't quit wanting to.

Anyway, why would anybody want to give up something that is such fun, harmless and not too expensive?

I agree with the above sentiments, Cding is a state of mind that we aquired in childhood, becoming with time part of our psyche, even if we do it very rarely.
Smoking tobacco is just an addiction to a drug and with minimum willpower is possible to give up, millions have done it without fuss, I have and rarely miss it.

[Marilynn]

I agree with the above sentiments, Cding is a state of mind that we aquired in childhood, becoming with time part of our psyche, even if we do it very rarely.
Smoking tobacco is just an addiction to a drug and with minimum willpower is possible to give up, millions have done it without fuss, I have and rarely miss it.

So you're forgetting the smokers who kept puffing until the day they died of lung cancer or emphysymia? The smokers who smoke through the hole in their necks after surgery? It wasn't a minimum of will power for them. Many have quit smoking, but very few without fuss. You can't generalize about crossdressing from your own experience, any more than you can about smoking.

[Annemarie]

So you're forgetting the smokers who kept puffing until the day they died of lung cancer or emphysymia? The smokers who smoke through the hole in their necks after surgery? It wasn't a minimum of will power for them. Many have quit smoking, but very few without fuss. You can't generalize about crossdressing from your own experience, any more than you can about smoking.

Since tabacco was found to be a very addictive and eventually deadly drug in the 1950s, millions of people HAVE given up smoking without patches etc. A minority have not and no doubt died prematurely, I'm just saying that giving up smoking is not that hard to do, examples of crossdressers giving up cding and never thinking about it or doing it again are almost non-existant.

[Lissa Stevens]

Speaking strictly for me I am a former smoker and a life long crossdresser. When I quit smoking it was cold turkey and it took quite awhile to stop the cravings which were due to what amounts to a drug addiction.
I tried several times to quit crossdressing and I have never been able to go much longer than 3-6 months before the urge comes back. The longer I deny it the stronger it becomes until I feel like I'm going to explode. Crossdressing, and once again I am speaking for me, is not an addiction. It is simply who I am. I am TG also, so I believe it to be genetic. I can no more quit crossdressing than I can quit breathing. Whether this was a mistake of nature, proof that God has a sense of humor or this is the way I am supposed to be, I don't know. All I do know is this isn't just a Bad Habit I can quit.

[Christina Horton]

I say NO NO NO NO NO NO F$@KING WAY!!!!!! You cut your legs off you will miss them, but you can't just grow them back, if YOU want to quit , then quit, But WARNING WARNING DANGER WILL ROBERSON DANGER , If you do don't purge your clothing just box them up and find a safe place to put them and forget about it. AND WHEN the need to dress come's back , and it will come back you'ur not starting at square one. Maybe the thought that you can go back to it any time might keep you sain. So good luck hun. don't be afraid to come back if you get sad or depressed and need cheering up. HUGGS. :canada:

[Carly D.]

I think you can go cold turkey.. I went cold turkey when I was in highschool.. I threw everything out, which then was like three or four pairs of extremely runny pantyhose.. and didn't ever look back.. the desire never came back to cross dress again.. at least not with those clothes.. the feeling returned some five months after graduation.. and then I purged again with the feeling that this is it.. never again will I dress in these clothes.. and I have to say that I haven't ever worn those clothes again.. but I of course did buy more, and now with stupidity dropped I don't purge.. I do purge but not all my clothes.. I do go cold turkey for a day sometimes.. maybe even two.. but I am hooked.. hey.. it's not heroine.. or crack.. it's ok.. just think it through before you say never again...

[Deb The Brunette]

and with all the CDers I've talked to or met, I've not heard of one single CDer that successfully "cured" this aspect of themselves, nor has anyone I have ever talked to.

If there were a cure, the person would be making millions of bucks selling their services. There are a LOT of tortured soul CDers out there. Some of them here on this forum. If there were a "cure", we'd know about it.

Well I for one sure don't want to be "cured" I love my life

[Kris Vasquez]

I quit cold turkey in 1985 (after several purges over the years). It is like smoking. The urges do diminish. They never went away but were much easier to push away. I went until 2005. I missed out on a lot of life during those years but I also experienced a lot as well.

[sissystephanie]

I have to disagree with many on here regarding quiting, cold turkey or otherwise. You can quit if YOU REALLY WANT TO!! That is the key. The vast majority really don't want to quit, whether you are talking about smoking or being a CD.

Some years ago, before my wife passed away, I did quit being Stephanie cold turkey. I told my wife I didn't think it was fair to her, or our children, that I had another identity. So I purged everything, several thousand of dollars of clothing, shoes, etc. Some local charities really made out. My wife said it made her kind of sad, but if it was what I wanted then it was O.K.!

Five years later she told me that she really missed Stephanie, and wanted me to start dressing again if I would. She reminded me of all the fun times she and Stephanie had together as two girls. I had never had any depression over not dressing, since I had just put it completely out of my mind. but after listening to her, I agreed to try it again. As I have said many times before, I do not dress for any sexual reasons. I just like the fit, feel, and look of feminine clothing. My wife has been gone for over 4 years now, and I am still dressing. But I have told my darling GGF, who does know I am a CD, that I will stop any time she asks me to. And I will, because I know I can!! As I said earlier, it is willpower that is needed! You either have it or you don't!! I do!!

[battybattybats]

I have to disagree with many on here regarding quiting, cold turkey or otherwise. You can quit if YOU REALLY WANT TO!! That is the key. The vast majority really don't want to quit, whether you are talking about smoking or being a CD.

Ah the danger of projection-as-empathy. Sorry but you cannot assume you are not exceptional or that you may have a less common form of crossdressing desires that are more easilly suppressed!

Subjective experiences are valueless for determining the situations of others.

You assume you succeeded because you had made a more genuine choice.

I do not think that those who have killed themselves because they could not quit had less drive or determination than you.

Now it is true that people have different baselines of Willpower and Resilliance. thats important to recognise because it means that we cannot blame or look down on thhose who are born with and possess less will and capacity to adapt or withstand trauma and suffering without developing mental illness.

And through my teens I rarely dressed. I supressed it for months at a time maybe dressing 3 times a year on average and barely ever thinking about it. But it didn't genuinely fade, it just seeped in deeper and built up pressure in the unconcious. That's how repressed desires ussually work. A well understood psychological phenomena.

Just because conciously desire seems to fade it does not mean that it is not there unconciously. And such things pushed into the unconcious frequently do cause mental illness or increase the risks of it.

I was told by a psychologist that I fell into several high-risk catagories for depression because of my disability, my abusive relationship and my repressed CDing. It did not guarantee i'd get depression but I have very high resilliance. However it is not limitless and if I stayed in that relationship I would certainly have broken. The point is that each of those things do result in depression for many of the people in those circumstances and the more overlapping and the longer they persist for the higher the odds.

So even a handful of exceptions does not prove that it is capable for everyone or even a moajority. Nor does a lack of experience of deleterious effects prove there was no increased risk of them.

[bruste]

I quit smoking on Chantix though I have tried to do cold turkey on two occasions, but of no use. I have smoked for around 5 yrs with pack a day. Thanks to chantix and the support my family provided me. It really helped me to get over my nicotine addiction and I don’t feel craving anymore. There is one thing which I would like to share and which helped me a lot initially, try having a glass of water when you feel craving the most. It a tough road but it's worth so best luck to all those who want to give up smoking.

[Lilia_CD]

I have tried quitting a couple of times I always come back. I don't think it is the same type of urge as smoking.

[DianneRoberts]

I quit every day, for a few hours, once in a while a few days.....

Might as well quit chocalot..............


Dianne

[Cary]

Yes, You can go cold turkery(for a period of time). DON'T BE FOOLED, IT WILL COME BACK!

[Deborah Jane]

I tried quitting crossdressing and going cold turkey not long after my c/ding came back, the end result was that i ended up very depressed and became very aggresive with people!

I also tried to go cold turkey and stop smoking too, i ended up getting depressed and aggresive then too!

So at the end of the day my advice is.....

If it feels good, just do it!!!

[Annamarie B]

I had purged and been away from dressing for many years until a bit over a year ago. But I stumbled across a tgirl's Flickr page during an unrelated search, and I was drawn back in with the urges now being stronger than ever. I now wear wigs, shoes, dresses, and makeup (and enjoy it immensely!) where i used to be strictly a lingerie fancier. You may be able to suppress your longings to a degree, but they're always going to be in there somewhere!

[bianncats]

I've tried I don't know how many times...at birthdays, after fights, upon my daughter's graduation last week...when I got married, but every time there is a trigger...last one was at the laundry...saw a woman doing her laundry and bras and panties came into view in one of the dryers...and here I am today.

I won't ever purge again...I threw out some fabulous items that V.S. won't ever have again.

Bianncats

[Stacye Rose]

Right, wrong, or indifferent, I have found that one of the side effects of taking anti-depressants is that they seem to severely curtail my desire to crossdress. I have tried to go without my ADs but my behavior toward other people deteriorates dramatically and rapidly. I dress usually once or twice a year, and I'm fine with that. My life has gone quite happily along in this vein for 17 years.

I'm not making any judgements, reccommendations, or suggestions here. I'm just sharing my experience.

[Ralph]

If you want to stop then you really can do it, go for it.

And that sums it up quite nicely. If it's important enough to you, you will do it. Interesting how your question provoked so many people into saying it would be impossible for each of them... but you're not asking if I could quit, or bbb, or any of the others.

I was told "stop it you'll go blind" or words to that effect

Which brings to mind the old joke that ends with "Could I at least do it until I need glasses?"

I do agree that it's very unlikely the craving will go away completely, no matter how firm your resolve. But if there's something (or someone) in your life more important than crossdressing, concentrating on that priority will keep you occupied enough that the urges won't matter so much any more.

I'm kind of torn about the purging. On the one hand, keeping your stash "just in case" admits defeat before you even started; on the other hand so many of us have purged "for the last time and I'm never going to start again" repeatedly that we know it gets mighty expensive to constantly throw everything out "forever" only to be back again buying new stuff the next month, or year, or whatever.

So I guess if you have a lot of cash invested in your wardrobe, you could bundled it all up in boxes, tape 'em up securely, and bury 'em somewhere that it would take hours to get it out again - we have an outdoor storage shed piled floor to ceiling with boxes; if I put something on the bottom at the back of that pile it would take me DAYS to get it out again. By then the urge to backslide would be gone!

On the other other hand (I have lots of them), if it costs you a bundle to recover from purging, that provides an extra financial incentive to stay on the wagon.

In the end, it's all up to you and your priorities. What is the relative risk of stopping vs. not stopping? Which would cause you the most grief? If stopping will make your life better, I bet you can do it.

ralph

[Carly D.]

I have to disagree with many on here regarding quiting, cold turkey or otherwise. You can quit if YOU REALLY WANT TO!! That is the key. The vast majority really don't want to quit, whether you are talking about smoking or being a CD.

Some years ago, before my wife passed away, I did quit being Stephanie cold turkey. I told my wife I didn't think it was fair to her, or our children, that I had another identity. So I purged everything, several thousand of dollars of clothing, shoes, etc. Some local charities really made out. My wife said it made her kind of sad, but if it was what I wanted then it was O.K.!

Five years later she told me that she really missed Stephanie, and wanted me to start dressing again if I would. She reminded me of all the fun times she and Stephanie had together as two girls. I had never had any depression over not dressing, since I had just put it completely out of my mind. but after listening to her, I agreed to try it again. As I have said many times before, I do not dress for any sexual reasons. I just like the fit, feel, and look of feminine clothing. My wife has been gone for over 4 years now, and I am still dressing. But I have told my darling GGF, who does know I am a CD, that I will stop any time she asks me to. And I will, because I know I can!! As I said earlier, it is willpower that is needed! You either have it or you don't!! I do!!

But it will always be there.. it will always be a fight... it will always be there.. like water.. or maybe something else.. what's my point here??

[LilSissyStevie]

Of course you can quit! But, you're not likely to find many success stories here on a crossdressing site. What you'll find here are people who either don't want to quit (like me) or people who failed to. You may as well go to a skid row bar and ask if it's possible to stop drinking.