As everyone says, communicate over anything else. And tell her now. The biggest complaint of most wives is they wish they would have known sooner. Most wish they could have known before getting married (but its not always possible).
Don't worry about what she's said in the past. My SO told me repeatedly to not go gay on her (she had a good sense I was more feminine than I realized).
The roughest thing is there's a chance things won't go well. But if things arn't going to work out its better now then when you have kids and things are REALY complicated.
Have fun and enjoy life.
Skye
I am generally of the "don't ask, don't tell if you don't want her to ask and you don't want to tell" crowd (in the closet).
However, it's too late for that. Suck it up. The sooner the better. As gently as possibly.
Hugs
BekiJ
Hi. Coupla thoughts here, for what it's worth.
Well, she knows now.Originally Posted by Claire
Look, I've been married 15 years, and she found out five years after we married. And as careful as I am about everything, familiarity can make you sloppy. I got found out, just like everyone else. And yet I still fell into "damage control" mode, and let out only some of the real truth here a little bit at a time. Because of my hesitation, fueled by fear and the fact that she was soooo angry, to openly talk about this with my wife when given the chance, I've paid for it with a long and wonderful marriage to a woman that I still cannot communicate with on this issue. She is a good and moral person who has over time come to an acceptance of alternative gender lifestyles, yet I still do not know how to broach the subject with her. She's known that I'm a crossdresser for ten years now, and still we never talk about it. I do not know how to bring it up, and I'm very afraid that the discussion would harm us more than help us. I'm very afraid of upsetting the apple cart, especially when the cart is rolling along very well right now.
My fault? Yes, mostly. But I wish to this day that I had managed all this in a different way. I have great regret over our inability to discuss this, and I have a goal of one day getting there. I wish you luck.
Oh, and hey.....everybody. Let's not keep reprimanding her for the obvious, okay? Glass houses, remember?
Any money found in the laundry is MINE!
"This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"
www.flickr.com/photos/tgmarla/
The best thing you can do is just sit her down and talk to her.
My so called friend told my wife(girlfriend at the time) and she took it really well and encourages me to dress. I just wish I told her.
Honesty is the best way.
Don't wait 33 years like I did.....communicate about it & treat her with kid gloves