Perhaps, but if I was in Wendy's situation, I would insist on counseling as a condition of continuing the marriage. If she refused, I would leave, and take my son with me. Wendy's behavior demonstrates unfitness as a parent, and sets a terrible example for her son.
If she insists on someone who thinks crossdressing is bad, then the therapist is taking her side, and that, to me, is a recipe for disaster. No competent therapist would do that.
Control freaks, in my experience, must be dealt with fairly, but very firmly. If it means breaking up the marriage, so be it.
Sorry to hear that things are not working out very well for you, Wendy. You probably already know your son knows something is up, and it's not very nice.
Cheers
Giuseppina