Leigh,
Good questions. My situation is different than yours. Mainly, my wife (told her when we were dating) was concerned that I might be gay. Also, her second fear was that I wanted to live as a woman. Once she realized for sure that I'm straight, the give and take issues began. I don't really care so much about going out dressed, so that's not a big concern. But, I do enjoy the occasional hike or bike ride dressed (out in the country, away from the neighbors)
But, I do like to get a full body wax and nails once or twice a year. The waxing I can hide, but I take vacation time to enjoy the acrylics. This week is one such week. When she's out of the house, I make damn sure she comes home to a clean one, and I do extra stuff like carpet shampooing, basement organization, on top of making her a nice dinner and getting her flowers.
I think if your husband is good at listening to your concerns, and IS HONEST with his level of CDing activity, you'll feel much better in the long run. Being trustworthy is key.
Good luck, and hang in there!
