(warning, long post)
If you haven't read my thread in the Clothing section called "Hello, Bombshell," I finally went to VS to buy a bra without any lame excuse like "I'm in a show" or "it is for my gf who happens to be the same size as me." I called ahead first, went it just as they opened and tried on bras until I found the one I liked. Part of my reason for dressing is that I find it psychologically stimulating. Questions like how will I be treated differently as a women rather then as a man and what will I feel like. Now obviously I'll never know the joys of being pregnent or dealing with a monthly issue like gg's (not saying that is a joy, even for guys to deal with) but my challenge is to blend in with the female population as best as I can and live like one for only awhile.
But I had an interesting mindset yesterday as I stood in guy mode in a VS fitting room with numerous bras laid out before me. I am a guy, I enjoy being a guy. I am a Ballcap, Dodge Ram driving, powertool loving, Action movie buff guy who loves a good fart joke and enjoys admiring the beauty of a woman. Yet I enjoy dressing as one and I need a new bra. A few times the SA would ask how I was doing in the room without ever entering. I would quickly reply just fine or great. I felt like I was being sort of matter of fact and even sensed annoyance in my tone. I was nervous and would have been more so had she wanted to enter to help. While we were back on the salesfloor choosing a color that I liked I noticed that she was treating me like any other woman buying a bra. She was being totally professional, polite and helpful. I could imagine her having this same conversation with women as well, but I am a guy - shouldn't I be treated like one? That was what my brain was saying to me. My brain kept telling me that it is abnormal for her to be comfortable and talking to me like she would to another woman. Perhaps my brain wouldn't have been saying those things had I dressed enfemme.
Case in point, I went out 3 times last winter to Target dressed enfemme to see if I could blend in and pass. I roamed the women's clothing section and never felt like I was violating lady land. No one paid attention to me and I was comfortable. Yet when I shopped there as a guy, I would dash into the racks, avoid nearby contact and grab and go before anyone realized that there was a man in the dept. So why did my brain have the desire to want to be treated by this SA as a guy while buying a bra? I have been dressing for many years now but the biggest difference is that until now I have never told anyone that I crossdress except for everyone on this site. Of course annonimity has its privilages so even though you know about Shelby, none of you know the real me. Even though this SA doesn't know me or Shelby, she is the first person to know that I dress.
Another example of how people are treated in a business is Best Buy. They did a study of female shoppers at BB and discovered that many do not feel comfortable going into what has been traditionally a male dominated store reaking of testosterone, big TVs blaring with loud explosions and tons of tech gadgets. It was cited that even though a male SA was eager to assist a female shopper, he would sometimes get overly excited about the technical abilities of a PC or phone and act like he was talking with another dude about some totally friggin awesome new video game with killer graphics. So BB made an effort to get more tech savvy female SAs on the floor with a calmer demeanour about the gadgets they sell. The company also moved some of it TVs away from the front door so as to not bombard a woman with the noise. (I am not saying that women could not handle shopping at BB, it was an article in the local paper stating the differences in how men and women shop and how one company delt with it). To be honest, I prefer buying from a gg tech girl because she is calmer and doesn't get to excited about the inner working jargon which I don't speak.
VS sort of did the same thing years earlier with the remodel of all there stores but not sure if this was done for men in mind. Remember they used to have more white fancy like wood work and a much softer tone in the store. Then they changed to this ultra modern black and white look. Was this done to make men less apprehensive about standing in a very feminine looking store? Did they try to tone down the estrogen to make men feel more comfortable?
Perhaps some of our beloved GG's can help provide some female insight on this. Have you ever shopped at a Male-dominant business and been treated like one of the guys and how did it make you feel? I enjoyed being spoken to at VS as if I were just another woman, but it was something that my brain was sensing that brought this topic up. I hope that you all understand where I'm going with this and please offer up some of your thoughts and experiences. Please also check out my thread "Hello, Bombshell" about my visit to VS. I felt like I made a big step yesterday and will continue to make other steps into the female world.
Shelby