Quote Originally Posted by ashgagal View Post
I have been Cding since childhood...long before I had a name for it. Like so many, it started with mom's panties, those soft beautiful secrets...and have continued to grow and expand to full dressing in my adulthood.

One thing hasn't changed though. The unbelievable desire to dress, the thrills and highs, followed by a terrible feeling of guilt and shame over dressing (usually immediately after orgasm). I get this feeling of, "you are a sick person. What is wrong with you. Why can't you be a man??" etc.

Anyone ever concur this?

I have the goal of sleeping en femme but invariably I touch myself and then peel everything off and feel sick and frightened. I want so badly to embrace this and feel good about it.
I have to admit I was once much like you, but with me I discovered I really wanted to be female. For me that was when I accepted who I am, and now enJoy the time I spend as my self. It will come, there is no reason why you can't accept and love your self for who you are.