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Thread: Update why are us olders, so interested in this

  1. #1
    Barb123 Barb123's Avatar
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    Update why are us olders, so interested in this

    So what is the deal with us older cross dressing folks? Are we really increasing our cross-dressing activity with age?
    I want input on this. You gals on this site seem to be mostly older (45+) and have gotten more active with this lately.
    A lot of us would be interested in this subject. Aren’t you?
    Here are the ideas that I want some feedback on:
    1. WE have more time on our hands and it is something to do
    2. We now can afford to do it right and we didn’t years ago
    3. We are going thru or have gone thru mid-life
    4. We are thinking “screw it”; what am I waiting for?
    5. Any illusion that we could be attractive woman is gone and we can settle for a pleasant looking middle age woman. A lot easier to achieve.
    6. We talk about it more because of this web site.
    7. Society is more tolerant
    8. It is just more fun than it used to be when your older
    I hope to get at least 100 responses and summarize the feedback at the end.
    Any thoughts gals? Barb123

    On Feb 24th, at 2:53 pm, I started a new thread and asked on this blog; So why are us olders, so interested in this. It seemed many of us “olders” got more interested in cross-dressing as we aged. Certainly, this poll was not a scientific survey, but it was nonetheless insightful to me and I wanted to understand what was going on here.

    There were about 40 responses in just 24 hours in mid week which was a great response. But once the newness of the topic eroded by newer threads, I got no more responses.

    The clear number one answer was “screw it, I am doing it’. This was on 71% of respondents!
    The sentiment seems to have been. ‘I had been waiting until… whatever, (kid’s growing up, wife acceptance, maybe these thoughts will go away), but I can’t contain this any longer.’ I suspect the downside risks were overcome by the needs to meet whatever is met by the needs we have to cross-dress. In the insurance business we say: “The perfume of the premium exceeded the stink of the risk”

    The second most common answer was “we now have more time” this was on 42% of the replies. I guess we were less distracted doing other stuff. What are me mo longer doing?

    The close third answer on 37% was this website or more conversation with others. My guess is we hear about the exploits, gained more courage or felt challenged or we see the pictures and say to ourselves “that looks like fun or I need to do something like it.” I would be open to your spins on this, too.

    In last place at 9% was “it is just more fun now”. I posed the question, to see if I was typical, because this is how I felt. It has been more fun for me but that may be because I am much more relaxed. Being a 50 something, sometimes passable woman is better than a bad looking guy trying to dress up. It may just mean that we weren’t all that involved when we were younger.

    Well what is your spin on the question?

    If you still want register your opinion on the survey, reply or drop me a note or you can refer to the thread. i will recalculate the results again on March 6and let you know if anything changed.
    Barb123
    Last edited by Di; 02-28-2010 at 10:14 AM.

  2. #2
    CD in S.A. Kimmy55's Avatar
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    Actually only # 4 works for me.I hid it for the longest time,deligently raising a family,caring about what the neighbors might think,etc,etc.Now that I'm older I just say "Screw it It's my time".I aint getting any younger and I've done for others the last 30 yrs.
    Kimmy 55

  3. #3
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    You missed the biggie!!! Were running out of friggin time!!!!
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  4. #4
    Gold Member DonnaT's Avatar
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    It's taken this long (30 yrs) for my wife to be accepting enough.

    As for looks, HA, I looked a lot more passable in my younger years.
    DonnaT

  5. #5
    Member MonicaJean's Avatar
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    #4 = yes.

    #9 - break from the stresses of life, no matter what those stresses are.
    Thankful for crossdressers.com, great people here have helped me realize who I really am on the inside. (formerly michelle1)

  6. #6
    Junior Member DeSkirt's Avatar
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    I have more time by myself where I can dig deeper into why and how.
    I also agree with #4

  7. #7
    Gold Member TxKimberly's Avatar
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    I think that in many ways, by the time you hit your mid to late 30's, you start to loose that fear of being something other than what everyone else is. When young, you want to fit in, you fear what people will think if they know your different. When you get older you just reach the point where that is not as important as it once was to you.
    I want to do this. It makes me happy. I no longer care if someone knows I'm different.

  8. #8
    Senior Member 5150 Girl's Avatar
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    Well,,, I think as we get older, we tent to not give a s**t waht others may think, anymore and just go for it.
    I think it's a bigger deal to the older generation because it was more of a taboo in our day. This generation doesn't see it as beeing a big deal. I think because the GBLT movement has moved from hiding in the closet to beeing more out there. Today's generation has basicly grown up with such things.

  9. #9
    They call me quiet girl.. Sarah...'s Avatar
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    Your testosterone naturally decreases after 40 or so?

  10. #10
    Senior Member Stephanie Miller's Avatar
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    When I get to what you refer to as "older" I'll let you know!
    Until then I'm just a young person trapped inside an old persons body. ( The wrong body to boot!)

    While you wait - I'll let the old biddies on the site answer!

  11. #11
    Gold Member Samantha B L's Avatar
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    It's all 8 for me plus what Kim says about worrying about fitting in when you're under 30. I'm 53 and I gave up on that ages ago. Oh and who could forget that time clock running out as Karen points out. Anyhow,count me down for all 8 of 'em.

  12. #12
    Silver Member Joanne f's Avatar
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    You are missing one point, when we were young it was almost impossible to do it or at least be more open about it so it just seams like we are doing it more whereas the young ones of today can do it with more ease so they will not feel this in the same way .
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne

  13. #13
    Senior Member
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    I don't think my feelings or dressing has changed as I got older. It has been the same all along---I have never been able to get it out of my head.

  14. #14
    Junior Member Nina (uk)'s Avatar
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    no3. Life is to short and you only realize that with age. Although i am mid life that seems the way for me. I wanna make the most of it.

    Forgot no4.
    Last edited by Nina (uk); 02-24-2010 at 03:24 PM.

  15. #15
    The best of both worlds Kathi Lake's Avatar
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    I'm good with #'s 2, 4, and 6 - I have enough money to support Kathi (My, that girl can shop! ), I'm getting older, and I will take every chance I can get for happiness, and this website really helps. I don't care about society, so #7 can take a flying leap! Although that could just be the old age talking. Darn kids today. Hey!! Get off my lawn!



    Kathi

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member JustWendy's Avatar
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    It's definitely not #3 - I have less money now than at any other time in my adult life - separated and supporting 2 homes. I think it's a touch of each of the rest, with a large dose of #4 and, as Karren said, if not now, when? I also agree with what Kimberly said, the older you get, the less pressure you feel to fit in.

  17. #17
    Member bobi jean's Avatar
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    older CD's and why

    I understand that I am differant than some on here but still wish I could be more like some of the others.(full time is my goal). crossdressing is something I need to do, not like to do, not any more.
    #1. no I don't have any more time on my hands now. I am still working and have my family, especially the grand daughters to spend time with. I am able to and do dress everyday at work now. I even drive to and from nearly every day.
    #2. no more money to spend and it is not any cheaper now than any time before. I just keep using the same outfits to buy the new one is.
    #3. went thru the mid life crisis and all that a long time ago but just recently decided to do it as close to 24/7 as possible.
    #4. I totaly said screw it a few months ago.
    #5. The illusion of passing went out the window a long time ago and being easier to pass as a middleaged lady is much easier. I have found that even shooting for an oler age yet isn't much fun but still easier yet.
    #6. I have recently found that I LOVE talking about it. and yes it has helped considerably.
    #7. social tolerance is changing but I don't think most of us live in total acceptance anywhere we go. Maybe at home with a totally accepting SO but that is about it. My need to live 24/7 is why I live alone now.
    #8. More Fun? where would anyone get that IDEA from. For most of us the fun went out the window when we discovered it is a need rather than a choice. however, it is just as enjoyable now as it ever has been. At least since the sexual part isn't a factor anylonger. It is a need to dress, not so much a choice for most of us.. At least it is for me.

    A great thread though. I can't wait to read more responses.
    No these are not womens clothes!! THEY ARE MINE, EVEN THE HEELS. (update 4/01/10) THEY ARE NOW ! ! !

  18. #18
    Member Amanda Stubbs's Avatar
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    I can agree with 1,2,4,5,6 & 8 no3 if I had a midlife crisis ididnt notice! No 8 not so sure about tollerance especially where I live although I've noticed many more youngsters are much more open nowadays

  19. #19
    Junior Member
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    My Own Way

    Interesting questionnaire. I've never been dissatisfied with my situation, age, or self-image when it came to cross-dressing. Over the years I've been content to cd when it was convenient. I kept it to myself simply because it was easier in all ways. It's true that in retirement, I have more free, uninterrupted time (item #1). Cding being affordable or not never figured into my equation (item #2). Going through midlife has nothing whatever to do with me (item #3). I've always done what I wanted as long as it felt comfortable (item #4). I long ago accepted the fact that I do not have the right kind of physical presentation that would please me en femme so it's never happened, and won't. Not a problem (item #5). I only came across this website in the last few weeks, so it has had no effect on my cd nature. I am saddened that so many people seem to be having a terrible time dealing with their cd nature (item #6). Is society "more tolerant" these days? Perhaps. Depends upon where you live, I think (item #7). Cding has always been "fun" for me, although that word is inadequate to describe what I derive from crossdressing.

    As for the "age factor," I'm sure that everyone has their own landscape of sexuality, whatever years they have. Some people shut down early, others never do. Learning what works with what you have seems important, i.e., listen to yourself carefully to determine what will work, what is appropriate to your inner being. Violate the needs of the latter and you will possibly betray yourself and become unhappy.

  20. #20
    New Member Anna_S's Avatar
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    Hi Barb, I'm 51.... here are my thoughts on your most interesting post! Look forward to the summary...

    1. WE have more time on our hands and it is something to do

    I have a lot less time than I used to


    2. We now can afford to do it right and we didn’t years ago
    I have big debts and no spending money. I buy clothes on Ebay. Even my (spits) male clothes.

    3. We are going thru or have gone thru mid-life
    Probably

    4. We are thinking “screw it”; what am I waiting for?
    Yeah a bit of that

    5. Any illusion that we could be attractive woman is gone and we can settle for a pleasant looking middle age woman. A lot easier to achieve.

    I think I'm more attractive as a man.... ok not to 20 somethings. But I think I could find an attractive 40 something.... Just don't want to. I think I'm female.


    6. We talk about it more because of this web site.
    No

    7. Society is more tolerant

    I think it was far more tolerant in the early 80s when I was young.

    8. It is just more fun than it used to be when your older

    Maybe




    Anyway.....look forward to reading all the replies


    Anna

  21. #21
    Tricia Dale tricia_uktv's Avatar
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    Maybe we have just grown up?
    I strut my stuff, I feel so proud,
    I need to shout, to scream out loud,
    I am Tricia I am she,
    I am who I want to be

    http://tricia-dale.blogspot.com/

  22. #22
    Gold Member sherri52's Avatar
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    I'm only 58 but if you want my opinion with the old girls here it's # 4 . We have given up on what people think. For years we went through the stages of fear hoping that no one will find out. Now we don't care who finds out, we don't want to hide anymore.
    Put a little lipstick on you'll feel better

  23. #23
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    I certainly have more time on my hands now that the kids are all out of the house - and greater "security" knowing they won't often pop in un announced. Also, I made sure that my CDing was acceptable to my SO before we married, so it hasn't been at all difficult to incorporate into my daily routine. And finally, I do think we become more feminine as we age, especially in the hormonal sense. testosterone levels decline after late 30's...so there's less of that guy stuff fighting off the girl inside! My theory at least!

  24. #24
    Arell Roberta Lynn's Avatar
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    "While you wait - I'll let the old biddies on the site answer!"
    Hey I resemble that remark!!! Thanks a lot Stephanie M

    # 1, 6 and 4 are probably most relevant to me.

    #1: The last 10-12 years I worked I was putting in 60-70 hrs a week, not only did I not have the time I didn't have the energy to dress. Now that I'm retired and my children are out of the house I have the time, energy and the opportunity.

    #6:Being on this site has made me become more accepting and comfortable with myself, so I probably do dress more often because of all the support here.

    #4 I've reached the point where, except for my wife and children, I don't care what other people think of my cross- dressing, if they don't like it that's their problem. But I do agree with Karen's point of view. I ain't gettin any younger.

    The rest of the points have some relevance, except for #5
    I have never, at any age, thought I would make an attractive woman.

  25. #25
    Member Jamie48's Avatar
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    #1 Yes I have more time to indulge & it is great.
    #2 Yes I can afford more now. So many beautiful things to buy & I,m not getting any younger.
    #4 Yes I am to the point in life where I just don't care what others think I
    am fully accepting of myself & am just going to enjoy. I am fully dressed right now & I feel great.

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