Are gays more accepted than cd's?
Went to a distant mall dressed 90/10 Shari, jeans, bra, etc. Nobody paid any attention and I got to thinking it's okay, they just think I'm gay. I'm not but disappointed the gay cashier at the food court also didn't notice me! Back to my question, have gays made such advances that it's more accepted. Other than the few rednecks that kinda scared me, I had a good time.
Shari
Maybe it's that it is probably a bit harder to tell if one is gay as opposed to being a crossdresser? Unless of course the gay wears a sign around his neck proclaiming that he is in fact gay.
Homosexuals are better known and understood than us. Everyone knows a homosexual and knows that they know a homosexual. No one knows they know us. Because we aren't out of the closet, we're less accepted. Some of us have to step out and own up. Recent stuff on TV with TS's coming out are helpful to this cause, but more of us have to stand up and not be afraid to tell people.
I know it's easier said than done; there are a lot of people I still haven't told.
Everyone knows a crossdresser... they just don't know that they know!Originally Posted by Veronica Nowakowski
That's a fact. And yes homosexuals are more accepted into the social standards.
If I look at my work, I have a homosexual colleague. He never hid the fact, one day it just came out in some conversation and everybody knew. No big deal. He is accepted at work, and he can just be himself, he's just a guy doing his work. But I can't imagine what would happen if I'd show up at work as a girl one day.
Being a Tgirl involves having a different appearance, and appearance is often an important thing at a job. While sexual interest often does not really show, and is more related to your private life anyway...
Last edited by Jessy; 03-21-2010 at 04:42 PM.
"One day Jessy, I'm gonna show you the world..."
God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared "I can do better than that!" and so He created women.
The ITer stepped back, looked at the beta results, and declared "I can do better than that!" and so he created the final version.
Sometimes in the final version, some of the beta crap still remains. I know, because I'm living proof.
I think that since the gays and lesbians have long fought for their rightful place in society, the results of their fight are more obvious, specific laws and regulations, the recent girl whose prom was canceled because she publicly wanted to go to it with a girlfriend, etc. They have been out in the public eye for years to get where they are now at. On the other hand, us Tfolk are not as out in the open and I believe that there is less public effort on our part to secure our own rightful place in society. We tend to hide ourselves from family, friends and, in many cases, except for those that go out a lot and actively interface with others, society as whole. Therefore, I do think that gays and lesbians are more accepted, tolerated and understood than us.
Yes Jessy is right, I am not out at work but I am pretty sure everyone know or suspect something and nobody gives me trouble, am just doing my work
I wonder if it's economically driven too?
If the 'lace' pound (or dollar) ever becomes as strong as the pink pound (or dollar), CDers will become much more mainstream and the subject of advertising, marketing campaigns and sales drives.
If you are gay then every one knows what you are and understand what you are and what it means, Cding on the other hand is to the general public something completely different .
For a start they do not know or understand why you are doing it and it is common place with every one to miss trust people who hide their identity , we all assume that if someone is covering up their face they are up to no good , if you see a teenager with a hoodie on you think that they are up to something.
Unless you know the reason why like it or not we all mistrust people who hide their identity.
People simply mistrust men who wear women's clothes because they think it is all to do with a sexual thrill, it is simply a lack of understanding.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
Absolutely right.
Also I notice that women and men are just placed in seperate boxes by society. Like a man is a man, and a woman is a woman, nothing between it. A homosexual man is still a man. And a crossdresser is someone with psychological issues or an identity crysis
Seriously, if people were only willing to put some time in research and try to understand each other, the world would be a better place...
"One day Jessy, I'm gonna show you the world..."
God stepped back, looked at Adam, and declared "I can do better than that!" and so He created women.
The ITer stepped back, looked at the beta results, and declared "I can do better than that!" and so he created the final version.
Sometimes in the final version, some of the beta crap still remains. I know, because I'm living proof.
homosexuals have had thier fight with John Q Public and have earned the respect that they now hav although it is not 100%. We as crossdresses are afraid to come out of the closet and get together and fight for ours. Get dressed, get out, and let the world know that we are cd's and the world will have to except us. If not for what we are but by how many of us there are.
Put a little lipstick on you'll feel better
The thing is that we don't really have to fight alone. We're included in LGBTQI (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, and Intersex). If we simply make a presence, there are many that will fight alongside us.
Just hadn't thought about before
Thanks. I admit I never gave it a thought before today. I hope I don't sound too ignorant. I hid behind the label like it was a shield, that's what really caught me by surprise...hiding my cd'ing by appearing gay. Since I cannot pass as Shari, I always go for the understated look, just enough of my fem self to feel good (very lite makeup, just my real breasts, etc).
Shari
Yes that is helpful but you have another difference from gay people, most gay people if they have a partner then their partner will no doubt also be gay so they will have no problem fighting alongside, but a lot of Cd/TG are married with children so they would not feel that it is fair to drag them into it which puts them in an awkward position.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
A yes to that. I hate to bring this up, but they only started to gain rights only after the violent "Stonewall" riot. I certainly do not advocate any violence on our part, but it is something to think about.
I would say so, but mainly because they have been much more openly active than most crossdressers.
I'm just curious what the Gay cashier was supposed to do. Was he/she supposed to go "Oh look, a Crossdresser, isn't that sweet?" Or if he assumed you were Gay "Hey...another Queer just like me!"
I'm Gay, and I don't go and approach or make a comment to every Gay person I see, or every CD for that matter. It's a bit silly to think that someone is going to automatically say something or befriend you because you are either Gay or a CD. The fact is, most people don't find it is any of their business, or they frankly just don't care.
To expand on what Allie said, the more gay people got out there, the more acceptance they achieved. The more we go out into the everyday world, the more we'll be accepted.
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I went to a club almost 2 weeks ago for the first time that was a gay club with some of the other girls on here and I'd have to say yes. I was the first to arrive and hadn't been in the club more than a minute when I was invited to join a group at a table. Likely wouldn't happen in a straight club, though I really don't go to clubs much at all.
If I had any idea that therapy, hair removal, hair transplants, doctors and medications were so expensive I would have planned to be rich first.
er ..... why? and how do you know he/she didn't 'notice' you? Perhaps you were noticed but (as in my everyday life) you were not treated differently form anyone else.
What did you expect the cashier to do/say? ......
Mirani - [meer-rahn-nee] Beauty to Behold; to "See" beauty
Last month I was in my mom's third wedding. The minister that did the wedding was lesbian, and her partner was present. Such a thing couldn't be more obvious to everyone. I've never seen such a warm and happy and jubilant wedding amongst us all who attended. .....far cry from my biological parents first very Catholic wedding in a small New England town. Such a thing would have been unimaginable in 1957.Everyone knows a crossdresser... they just don't know that they know!
My job, since my grandfather has passed away, was to "give my mom away". ......not so sure things would have worked out if I was in a dress or gown since I obviously had to be the man.
Both my parents (both separated & remarried) have plenty of gay friends. I am not aware of a single transgendered person, let alone a crossdresser they know. Did they ever expect my crossdressing tendencies? Sure.
Are thety aware that I have stepped out of the house,and into a public environment, probaby not. As far as I know, I am the first in my generation of my family to have transsexual friends. I believe that some of this is generational. It was only a few decades that the psychiatric community thought that the cure for homosexuality was electroshock therapy, like Jack Nicholson in The One Who Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. I am from the era where pop stars genderbended ragularly. If you asked my parents what HRT was, they probably wouldn't know. So I think much of the public attitude is generational.
sometimes exept by the "stupid people"
if being a cd makes me crazy then where is my jacket
It just that many people who absolutely have no clue think that any guy who appears feminine is gay. they don't know or care that there are also such people who are identify as cd, ts, or tg. for them "its all the same S#$$" which is how they describe our community. sad i know...
I don't know what the cashier shoulda done, it is silly to think it at all. I hope I haven't offended anyone....wasn't my intent anyway. The problem with so many years of secrecy is you never learn or grow. That's what I want to change in my life. I guess I want someone to say "hello, I see you". Then I would know that I am a real person. I like it here, thanks.
Shari
Bingo - my thoughts exactlyMaybe it's that it is probably a bit harder to tell if one is gay as opposed to being a crossdresser? Unless of course the gay wears a sign around his neck proclaiming that he is in fact gay.
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