I should have elaborated, not everyone wants to read my whole biography.
1. For most of my childhood years, I was told that I was supposed to be a girl, I was often dressed as one, and taught to be like one. The only physical affection I ever knew as a kid, was when I was dressed and acting as a girl. Call it conditioning or whatever, it imprinted the idea that I was really a girl into my mind, and it will never go away. So, I subconsciously always feel like I'm supposed to be a girl and wear girls clothing, so I do whenever I can. Wearing mens clothes feels inappropriate.
2. No SO to be open with. So far, I haven't met a woman who is interested in a guy who is stuck with feeling like he's supposed to be a girl, even if we both know that the rest of me knows it's not true.
3. I never really thought of my 'girl side' as being something to be attracted to. I'm guessing you're questioning the idea postulated by the autogynephilia theory here? Or maybe you mean romanticizing the idea of being a girl as a better life than being a boy. Well, I would say that it's probably just different; not better, not worse, just different. For, if I were magically changed into a girl today, I would not be much better off, just presented with a new set of advantages in life, and some new disadvantages as well.
