I apologize

[GBNatarii]

I'd just like to waste a moment of all you guys/gals time and apologize for being a total jerk a week ago... Two weeks ago... One week ago... Last time I visited the site, and raging up a fire storm of burning anger-ness throughout the forums and just generally pissing virtually every one off. I'm gonna go ahead and be the bigger man-- the bigger "it", and say, I'm sorry. I messed up. I know it. We all know it. Well, at least the people who saw and read the posts know it.

I was beyond frustrated that weekend from a multitude of things, most of which concerned my CD'ing and wanting to be a full TS. I was angry that my father is not going to accept the whole thing worth a crap, and my mother is only faking acceptance, and my sister is just ignoring me for her boy-toy. I was also angry (like I pretty much always am) at the world for the various political and current event news stories going on at the time. I was mad that I wasn't (and quite frankly, we or most of us, all are) going to be accepted in that weird, messed up place called Real Life.

Maybe I was hoping this site would be a good escape for a few hours, like I use my video games for. I dunno. I was just frustrated that I essentially wasn't allowed my opinion on certain things, that now I realize, either don't matter as much for this specific forum site, or simply didn't need to brought up or shared. I still maintain my views on those subjects, but I now know this is not the place to voice them. A political or philosophical forum would probably be better. I guess I just came here expecting a perfect dreamy place to relax, and was thrown off a bit. Admittedly, most to all of this little corner of a safe haven was destroyed by own doings.

Anyways, I went off, as every one knows. Made posts that annoyed people to no end, and got roughly half my posts deleted because of it. I shouldn't have taken it out on you guys/gals so quickly.

I'm sorry.

(And to think, I still can't even pass my bloody college english class. I took intro to English five times, and now College Composition this summer is my... fourth time. Yeah... I've not figured that one out either.)

[Kathi Lake]

Silly question, but are you doing the work in your college class, and turning it in? I ask because you do seem to produce well-written, if occasionally inflammatory posts.

Anyway, glad you're back! Stay! Good girl!



Kathi

p.s. You are always allowed your opinion. Others are allowed theirs as well - even if it contradicts yours. That's the way this big ol' world works.

[GBNatarii]

Silly question, but are you doing the work in your college class, and turning it in? I ask because you do seem to produce well-written, if occasionally inflammatory posts.

No. I rarely, if ever, do homework.

p.s. You are always allowed your opinion. Others are allowed theirs as well - even if it contradicts yours. That's the way this big ol' world works.

I will gladly pick up my gun and defend YOUR right to have a different opinion than me. I highly doubt many others would return the favor. That angers me far more than anything else.

[Kathi Lake]

No. I rarely, if ever, do homework.

Gee, then I think I see the problem. Lackofgiveashit-itis. Unfortunately, it's rather common in students these days. You want to pass? Do the work!

I will gladly pick up my gun and defend YOUR right to have a different opinion than me. I highly doubt many others would return the favor. That angers me far more than anything else.

Sorry. Gotta call bullshit on that one. Unlike you, I have actually been issued a gun or two in my years in the military to do just what you believe no one will. As you will notice on this board, I am not the only military member. So, you most certainly have the right to say what you will.



Kathi

[GBNatarii]

Sorry. Gotta call bullshit on that one. Unlike you, I have actually been issued a gun or two in my years in the military to do just what you believe no one will. As you will notice on this board, I am not the only military member. So, you most certainly have the right to say what you will.

Hmm... First, the comment was not directed at you personally. Second, I don't know of any members of the site serving in the military, so quite frankly, I essentially had no way of wording the comment with out offending some one, apparently.

Third, I'm not entirely sure what you're calling bs on. So I'll tackle both.

I can't join the armed forces because I'm hearing impaired, plus that little stint of having a brain surgery two years ago (still gotta take medicine for seizures). If I could join, I would have joined the second I turned 18.

Besides that, I have gotten a few gun permits, and I currently own a few guns of my own. Defending peoples rights is not only a foreign issue, but a domestic one as well. I do not feel very strongly that many people would defend against our domestic problems at this time.


Jeez, I just wanted to apologize for being an ass the other week, and I can't even do that...

[JulieK1980]

Yup you'd be wrong about no one willing to pick up a gun and fight. Been there done that.

As for the domestic/foreign well I'd say we just simply disagree that its currently necessary.

[Daintre]

Jeez, I just wanted to apologize for being an ass the other week, and I can't even do that...

Apology accepted, we can all be asses here at times, emotions will do that to us. I appreciate the fact that you decided to try and right what you felt was a wrong action on your part, good on you.

Politics are not allowed on this forum for good reason, the subject inflames to many people. talk of gun use (non political) can be talked about in the lounge.

All I can add is never post when you are angry and wanting to lash out and also, just chill and get to know us better.

[Samantha B L]

It's cool,it seems like you had a lot of stuff weighing in on you a week or two ago. As for me,I never noticed anything unusual. Sometimes the forum heats up a little bit. Like once every two or three months and somebody posts a whole lot. I mean,I've had about 30 posts edited or deleted since I registered in 2006. If it matters,I don't think your family members are ever going to be %100 comfortable with your TG/TS/CD tendencies. I hope your not leaving the forum?!

[Nicole Erin]

People get upset, it happens.
I don't think anyone would really hold it against you.

[Dana]

There are more than not former military, military reserve, national guard, police etc that are members of this forum than not.

I myself am a retired U.S. Marine Gunnery Sergeant, former Marksmanship Instructor, PMI (Primary Marksmanship Instructor) Drill Instructor X 2 (That is I did two tours on the Drill Field at Parris Island, South Carolina)

Cross dressing / being transgendered crosses any and all social/cultural/economic strata.

[Kathi Lake]

Jeez, I just wanted to apologize for being an ass the other week, and I can't even do that...

No no, don't worry about it. Apology accepted. What I was trying to do is let you know that you need to stop coming into every post with guns blazing. Apparently I didn's get that across as clearly as I should have. For that, I apologize.

Kathi

[GBNatarii]

Ugh, so many peoples to respond to...

Yup you'd be wrong about no one willing to pick up a gun and fight. Been there done that.

As for the domestic/foreign well I'd say we just simply disagree that its currently necessary.

All righty then.

Apology accepted, we can all be asses here at times, emotions will do that to us. I appreciate the fact that you decided to try and right what you felt was a wrong action on your part, good on you.

Politics are not allowed on this forum for good reason, the subject inflames to many people. talk of gun use (non political) can be talked about in the lounge.

All I can add is never post when you are angry and wanting to lash out and also, just chill and get to know us better.

I definitely rarely start off as angry... And I've been trying to get to know peoples here, but it's just... not working.

It's cool,it seems like you had a lot of stuff weighing in on you a week or two ago. As for me,I never noticed anything unusual. Sometimes the forum heats up a little bit. Like once every two or three months and somebody posts a whole lot. I mean,I've had about 30 posts edited or deleted since I registered in 2006. If it matters,I don't think your family members are ever going to be %100 comfortable with your TG/TS/CD tendencies. I hope your not leaving the forum?!

I'm still debating it. I feel at this current moment there's virtually no questions left for me to pose to you guys, since it appears virtually all the answers are "Trial and error" answers.

No no, don't worry about it. Apology accepted. What I was trying to do is let you know that you need to stop coming into every post with guns blazing. Apparently I didn's get that across as clearly as I should have. For that, I apologize.

I... See... I don't know how to respond without setting off another firestorm and getting posts edited and deleted.

[Daintre]

First off, there is nothing wrong with posts being edited or deleted, heck I get posts edited and deleted, it's no big deal.

Any answer to a question you may ask will always be based on the poster's knowledge, personality so many other factors....there are no definitive answers.

The posts that get members in trouble are mean spirited ones or inappropriate ones. It is a good idea for everyone here to at least read the rules once.

[JulieK1980]

If it counts for anything, I admire how vehemently you defend your views.

I think the internet is kind of like a bar, politics and religion are best left out of the conversation. People tend to assume your attacking them personally when you attack the points they make. It also tends to get uglier because of the anonymous nature of the internet. I assure you I have had my own slap on the wrists here getting into political debates. Its difficult to bite your tongue when someone says something that goes completely against your grain. But I don't think this is really the place for those types of arguments, and the web is full of forums that you can aggressively argue your points. You also have to take into account that a lot of members here aren't even from the US and probably could care less about our political squabbles.

[Presh GG]

Don't worry GB, we all have those days/ weeks / months oh yes even years.

You're a good egg,.. youth fired up? Hmm, reminds me of the 60 s. Oh we talked politics for hours , Nothing wrong with that, it's just not the right place is all.

I'm glad things are better, they are better,,, aren't they ?

Presh GG

P.S.
Please
reread Kathy , she makes some very good points, Read it from the other side, you'll see.

[GBNatarii]

Don't worry GB, we all have those days/ weeks / months oh yes even years.

You're a good egg,.. youth fired up? Hmm, reminds me of the 60 s. Oh we talked politics for hours , Nothing wrong with that, it's just not the right place is all.

I'm glad things are better, they are better,,, aren't they ?

Presh GG

No. No they aren't, in my opinion.

P.S.
Please
reread Kathy , she makes some very good points, Read it from the other side, you'll see.

Honestly, I don't understand any of Kathi Lake's points other than "not to enter the conversation all fired up and angry at the start of the race."

[Lover girl]

I didn't read or here about any posts that set people off but it's all about how you see things and how to respond to them that matters. I was in the army myself and I will stand up for what I beleive in. This forum is for understanding yourself and what you want to do with it. At times I think we all fly off the handle but we sit back and take a deep breath and calm down!! I for one tend to fly off the handle about a lot of things!!! Sometimes I say things I wish I hadn't said. Just move forward in a calm state of mind and things will work themselfs out in time!!! I only hope that you find comfort in knowing that we are a support group above all else. Support in many different ways if you take the time to understand it and work from inside the framework that has been set up. You will be at peace in body and mind!!!!

[Stephanie Miller]

I think there is an easy way of helping you. Dude, YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT!
To tell you the truth, I don't remember any of your old posts. If they started out as bad as you say, then I probably started to read them and stopped. I'm here for a nice time and good friends - don't need crap in my life. Got enough of it to go around - don't need more.
From what you said to start this thread, was that you were "frustrated" or "angry" from a multitude of things.
1) wanting to be a full TS
2) my father is not going to accept
3) my mother is only faking acceptance
4) my sister is just ignoring me
5) at the world for the various political and current event news
6) I wasn't going to be accepted

And that was just in the second paragraph!

Well, if all of them have not miraculously gotten fixed since then, then you still have a lot on your plate. Which I can also surmise means you still have a lot of anger on your plate. Don't take it out on the girls here. We're on YOUR side. We can't fix things, we just give advice from our experience. You, unfortunately still have to deal with it fixing "it". It will take time, if they get fixed at all. There is no instant gratification in this world. ( except that one time this chick gave me a very snide comment, only to curtly turn right into someone and have a drink spilled on her. That was O.K. I guess..... ).
Yes GB, we voice our opinions to each other. But in the end we're still friends. I too have guns (my wife says I have to stop buy them for a while. But I think she is saying that just so she can catch up! ) And I would gladly pick them up to defend your rights or domestic problems. You wouldn't have known that just looking at me, because I, like the vast majority of people don't carry a sign on our backs stating it.
Your comment "I definitely rarely start off as angry... And I've been trying to get to know peoples here, but it's just... not working." brings to mind the quote you catch more flies with honey instead of vinegar.
If the girls here - including me - didn't give a diddly about you..... we wouldn't have responded to your post. Try thinking of us a friends already. That way you don't have to expend any energy trying for something that already is.
Head up girl. You're in a good place.
Among friends.

[docrobbysherry]

I was VERY angry as a young man, and it had NOTHING to do with gender issues. I only started dressing at age 55!

I was worried about being drafted, so I tried to be good uni student! Altho, that wasn't my nature! I had my own business that had become pretty successful after 7 years.

When I WAS drafted, I missed out on my degree, left all my close friends, lost my business and my girlfriend. She wanted to get married rite then. Because she was so sweet, another grabbed her as soon as I left. I was kind of an antisocial jerk most of the time, and, I knew it wouldn't work!
When I got out of the service, I didn't do much, drank a lot, got in arguments in bars, and pissed off virtually everyone!
I felt I had been CHEATED out of my life! At age 25, yet!

After a couple of wasted years, I went back to college, started working in a new field where I thot I could do OK and help people, and gradually got back into life again!
I STILL had many anger issues, however!

10 years later, I suddenly realized, I WASN'T ANGRY ANYMORE! I had built a new life and felt successful and confidant! I was truly happy for the first time in my life! And, I still am, 30+ years later!

I'm hoping the same thing will happen to U, one day!

[Kathi Lake]

GB, there's some great info here - read and reread Stephanie's post particularly. She took the time to post what I didn't. Mainly that:

We see a lot of anger in you - directed at yourself, directed at others, directed at nothing in particular. That is no way to live a life! Anger is usually a power thing. People get angry because someone/something has the power or the upper hand - parents, "The Man," friends, or institutions - over you. However, it does "take two" so to speak. There will always be events in life in which we have no control, except for one thing - how we respond to the event. You know the old saw about life and lemons? Well, if all you do with the lemons that life hands you is to suck on them, sour is all you'll get.

We are your friends here. Yeah. Believe it. Trust me, if I didn't care about you, I would not be here posting this. Why would I waste the time? So, take what is said here in that manner - someone who cares enough to not just pat you on the back and say, "You go girl!" but instead will help you by the sometimes painful process of pointing out issues of which you may not be aware.

So, if I had any advice to give you (other than wearing sunscreen), it would be this. Whenever you think you're powerless in a situation, realize that you are not. You have the power to determine your reaction. You have the power to do better. You have the power to make your life what you want it to be. When you don't do the work in a class, you cannot complain that you can't pass the class. Your life is in your hands. What are you gonna do with it?

I hope these points were clearer.

Kathi

[Samantha B L]

GB, I didn't mean to imply you should exit the forum if you happened to take it that way. Please don't. You've got a lot of freinds on here. And To tell you the truth your posts aren't that strange or out of order. I've been lurking the forum since 2004 and I've seen some pretty off the wall posts which I assume got deleted.

[GBNatarii]

Okay, first off, you old people (Yes, you're old, in my eyes) have got the weirdest analogies and aesops ever...

I think there is an easy way of helping you. Dude, YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT!
To tell you the truth, I don't remember any of your old posts. If they started out as bad as you say, then I probably started to read them and stopped. I'm here for a nice time and good friends - don't need crap in my life. Got enough of it to go around - don't need more.
From what you said to start this thread, was that you were "frustrated" or "angry" from a multitude of things.
1) wanting to be a full TS
2) my father is not going to accept
3) my mother is only faking acceptance
4) my sister is just ignoring me
5) at the world for the various political and current event news
6) I wasn't going to be accepted

And that was just in the second paragraph!

That was... pretty much the point of the second paragraph...

Well, if all of them have not miraculously gotten fixed since then, then you still have a lot on your plate. Which I can also surmise means you still have a lot of anger on your plate.

Always.

Quite simply, it's just incredibly easy for any random person to make me mad. They could say something, or look at me a certain way, and my first thought is banging their head into a wall. It has always been there, it will always be there, and I've accepted it.

Don't take it out on the girls here. We're on YOUR side.

I doesn't feel that way as often as the people posting in this thread seem to want it to appear as...

Yes GB, we voice our opinions to each other. But in the end we're still friends.

I... See...

Your comment "I definitely rarely start off as angry... And I've been trying to get to know peoples here, but it's just... not working." brings to mind the quote you catch more flies with honey instead of vinegar.

I don't get it. I've never got those weird cooking analogies...

We see a lot of anger in you - directed at yourself, directed at others, directed at nothing in particular. That is no way to live a life! Anger is usually a power thing. People get angry because someone/something has the power or the upper hand - parents, "The Man," friends, or institutions - over you. However, it does "take two" so to speak. There will always be events in life in which we have no control, except for one thing - how we respond to the event. You know the old saw about life and lemons? Well, if all you do with the lemons that life hands you is to suck on them, sour is all you'll get.

I'm not entirely sure what is it with me. I've had several therapists try to figure out why I'm angry. The majority have theorized my past. And specific moments of my past. Oh wells, I've given up on trying to figure it out.

Oh... And another... cooking... analogy...................

(other than wearing sunscreen)

I already have to. Docs said if I get one more even slight sunburn, I'm garaunteed, 100% chance of having severe skin cancer.

So, if I had any advice to give you (other than wearing sunscreen), it would be this. Whenever you think you're powerless in a situation, realize that you are not. You have the power to determine your reaction. You have the power to do better. You have the power to make your life what you want it to be. When you don't do the work in a class, you cannot complain that you can't pass the class. Your life is in your hands. What are you gonna do with it?

Keep fighting until others see the truth? Even become a martyr if I have to. More likely a tiny mosquito on the wind shield...

GB, I didn't mean to imply you should exit the forum if you happened to take it that way. Please don't.

I said I was debating, not that I was sure.

[Kathi Lake]

Oh... And another... cooking... analogy...................

Hey, what can I say? Old people get hungry.



Kathi

[Karen564]

[SIZE=2]Yeah, Fine, apology accepted....enough already, your forgiven...so can we now move on ....lol...[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2][/SIZE]

[GBNatarii]

[SIZE=2]Yeah, Fine, apology accepted....enough already, your forgiven...so can we now move on ....lol...[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2][/SIZE]

I'm so happy that you're able to find humour in this thread, and are so readily able to accept my apology without the slightest thought........................................... ............................