It always freaks me out when I come across kids, and i'm dressed up.
I guess it kinda makes me feel like I am doing something wrong and i just got caught.
I dunno go figure.
It always freaks me out when I come across kids, and i'm dressed up.
I guess it kinda makes me feel like I am doing something wrong and i just got caught.
I dunno go figure.
James "Kat",
I am using my actual name. You don't appear to have the guts to use your actual name.
I have not done any hormonal treatments nor any surgery (e.g. breast implants) on my body. Large breasts in males run in my family. My hips are wide not due to fat but simply that I inherited that property from my mother. I am 5'10'' (178 cm) and I weigh about 188 lbs (85 kg), so I am only overweight and not obese. I have a target weight of 175 lbs (80 kg) so that I am no longer overweight.
You do have all the finesse of a sledgehammer in your last statements.
As far as my appearance I am overwhelmingly called "Sir" even when I wear a skirt. Draw your conclusions from that.
I also might mention that I sing second bass in the community chorus and church choir, so even if I wanted to sound like a woman it would be very difficult to do so.
John
Last edited by JohnH; 10-27-2010 at 06:11 PM.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
John -
I can dish it, and I can take it. It's my decision to not use my real name - not really a guts thing, call it what you like. More of a safety precaution. I come to this site to learn about myself and about others who share my compulsion to dress. I cannot figure you out.
Considering that crossdressing goes against the grain of society - it would be easier for most folks to just avoid doing it in public.. yet you choose to go out into the world presenting yourself as a male who likes to wear skirts. I'm sure this confuses many. So I would like to ask why you do it? Is it a sexual thing? Or is it a comfort thing? Or both? Why? If just comfort - I would think most would choose to be socially comfortable and choose pants over the only slight difference in comfort a skirt has to offer... and many women would tell you they'd rather wear pants.
BTW, you don't "inherit" hips from your mother. She has ovaries, which produce estrogen, which cause excess fat to develop on the hips and breasts. If you have larger hips than your waist then that is definately different than most genetic males.
One last note.. I certainly hope you don't wear a skirt to church. Unless that church thinks the bible is a bunch of crap. And if that's the case, what's the point if you can't believe in the church's instruction manual?
- Bob
Last edited by KatGRL774; 10-27-2010 at 06:56 PM.
Wow.
(I'll post more tomorrow)
Bob,
There is a huge difference between men and women as far as the genitals which is very obvious. I wear skirts for the comfort of not having the wedge of cloth rubbing against my testicles. Testicles are outside the body for the simple reason they need to be kept cooler. Men suffer from lowered sperm count, and testicular and prostate cancer due to the heat buildup that pants impose in hot weather.
Are you aware that 60 percent of the male population wear some variety of skirts? Also are you aware that in ancient Egyptian, Greek, and Roman cultures men wore skirts? In the ancient Greek and Roman cultures only women wore pants. In fact, the Romans had a term for pants - "feminalia". At one time in Rome if a man would dare show up wearing pants his property would be taken from him.
There are variations in how people are built. While my hips are not as wide as my mother's hers are wider than most women's. Yes, I do have wider hips than my waist. - waist of 37 inches and hips of 42 inches. But I don't have a disproportionate amount of fat on my hips - I simply have a wide pelvis.
Since when did Jesus wear pants? I don't wear skirts to church out of respect for the service, not because the Bible forbids me from doing so. That passage in Deuteronomy applies to women not wearing men's garments and men not wearing women's garments. I sort of have problems of women being permitted to wear pants to church since pants should be viewed as men's garments. Also the passage mentions that linen and wool are not to be mixed. So you have a very weak case of forbidding men from wearing skirts to church.
May I suggest that you who lives in a glass house [compulsion to cross dress] to quite throwing rocks at others. Either quit cross dressing or quit criticizing others.
John
Last edited by JohnH; 10-27-2010 at 07:34 PM.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
Well John, I actually am a recovering CDer. I make an effort to stop daily. I slip up occasionally, but mostly I do not dress.. anymore.
You've obviously read the Bible the way YOU want to read it, ignoring your conscience. What about all the other passages referencing homosexuals and effeminates? I know I'm not going to convince you - because you've already convinced yourself apparently that God is OK with crossdressing, and I guess you can take it up with Him when you see Him.
Now how about actually telling me the real reason you dress? Comfort is the only reason? Fear of testicular cancer? Please... That's a bunch of crap and I think you know it. As for the Romans, etc, what year was that?!
The whole point of this points to "WHY". Why do you feel such a need to have others accept as normal, things which are clearly not?
I guess you can live in your world, and I'll live in mine.
Last edited by KatGRL774; 10-27-2010 at 08:09 PM.
@Engendered, "Wow" is a huge understatement.
@VeronicaMoonlit, as per usual your post was precise, intelligent, and spot on correct.
That said, somewhere around post #43 this whole thread entered the twilight zone. Let's recap shall we: the traditional use of female pronouns lost it's favor, we reverted to male names and stopped being a forum for crossdressers, the OP itself totally disintegrated, we learned more than we could ever want about testicles, ovaries, hips, chests and body shapes, got an education in early anthropology (even including a nice dissertation on the roman and greek fashion styles..gee thanx John).
KatGRL, sorry for whatever happened to you as a child, but really now, if you can't participate on this forum in a decent manner than perhaps you should disregard this thread completely. Considering your last post, i have to wonder what it is that you think you can find here. Throwing around your self loathing is not what the majority is here to see.
John, your certainly welcome to share your opinion as you like, but at one point you were practically begging us all to adopt your own personal brand of being CD, is that going to be your typical post, i'd like to know if it is, as it will make it easier for me when i visit the forum.
Lastly KatGRL, you made a reference to the Springer shows being a bad influence, all this thread lacked was a stage and people and Jerry himself.
mj (Cassie)
"Kat", or James, or Bob, or whatever you choose to call yourself--
I think with your feelings you might feel better going over to skirtcare.org. That is a forum where men wear skirts, kilts, and occasionally, dresses as MEN. Over in that forum you get to see MEN discuss their clothes in a masculine context.
I am not homosexual, and I am not effeminate except for my body profile. I do NOT ignore my conscience. I simply feel that I should be able to wear skirts and dresses the same way as a woman can wear pants and shorts. Again you are making a mountain out of a molehill.
What I protest against is the very plain dress that is imposed upon men. Before the French Revolution men had very beautiful clothing. Our Founding Fathers of the US wore fancy clothes and wigs. But what happened with the French Revolution is that all clothing that smacked of aristocracy was done away with.
One thing that does bother me about this forum is that the participants adopt a feminine mindset - feminine names, references, and pronouns. It goes beyond simply wearing clothes outside the very narrow constraint of acceptable men's clothing.
I think you have no business hanging around this forum if you consider crossdressing to be sinful. This forum would tempt you so that you would slip.
I suggest you accept your wearing skirts and dresses as a MAN, and not be secretive about it. It is not the article of clothing that condemns; it is the mindset that goes behind it. You need to consider the feelings of your wife and those around you. Just don't imagine yourself as a woman. If you do choose to stay in this forum I suggest you adopt a masculine name as I have done.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
I now understand where Kat is coming from as he is a "recovering CDer" and "makes an effort to stop daily" and given his references to the Bible. Everyone has a right to believe what they want and everyone has their own path to seek God. It just makes it clear to me that we are really in two different paradigms on this issue because I don't have a religious or moral issue with CDing. When the paradigm is so different, there's really no point in arguing. We all just co-exist with our different perspectives and we try to get along as best we can. No one will convince anyone of anything in this discussion.
Some boys just can't help acting like girls...
My pictures: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mayatoronto/
MJ..
Good post! Very funny actually... and true too..
I do have some strong feelings. And I'm sorry if they are coming out in a good bit of hostility. I guess I just really want to understand what makes certain people tick. I have a great deal of unanswered questions and I guess that is what frustrates me so much about CDing and transgender to begin with. And no.. I'll probably never seek counseling because that would require an explanation to my family. Not gonna do it. Ok.. I'm going to let this go since you're right - this thread took a turn into the ditch.
Kat, James, or Bob was really getting under my skin with his judgemental writings. I normally am not so strident in my preferences as to masculine names and references. Sorry.Originally Posted by MsMjSerene
[Added section]
I really would like to see wearing skirts, dresses, and heels, and applying makeup become acceptable attire for men just as pants became acceptable attire for women in the 1940's. So that is why I have my preferences of using a masculine name and masculine references.
Last edited by JohnH; 10-27-2010 at 09:47 PM.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
You need to divulge what you perceive as a problem to your family. What is shameful is that you keep your activities a secret.
I hang my feminine clothing out in the open in my closet and don't keep any of my activities a secret to anybody.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
Now this is an impressive discussion and good arguments on both sides. But most of it is emotional opinion and not much is based on fact.
The thing is over 90% of what a child learns from their parents/guardians occurs in the first seven years of life. This is also where they develop their basic drives and desires. There are few CD's out that have not had any CD activity (or desire) as a child.
It is egotistical to assume that the one or few times a child sees a TG will influence that behavior. We TG's are just not that powerful. If that were the case, then I should be a coke snorting crack smoking ***** that is a cop, fireman and daredevil that likes to drop anvils on peoples heads.
I am guessing the kid just thought it was strange because it is not something he sees everyday. I am surprised he did not say to his dad and in an obviously loud whisper "Dad. That man has painted toes."
If the child does become TG, then he probably already had transgendered drives and at best/worst (depending on your position) is learning that he is not alone (which at any age is very comforting).
As far as theology go, it is pointless to comment as people tend to have fanatical views when it comes to religion. My opinion here is that if God wants to send me to hell for what I have become under his care, then more power to him/her. Despite that, I still want to be a good girl.
Thanx Kat, and i wish you well.
KatGRL, I do have Natural 40 B breasts and have had them since age 13 or 14. I have worn a bra, under doctors orders, since age 9. And I also have feminine hips which I have had for many years. No hormones or anything else involved. It is just me, the way I am. But I am a male, the father of two wonderful children who know that I crossdress and don't care. My late wife of course knew, actually from before we married. She fully supported me for the almost 50 years we had together. Since she is no longer around to help with my makeup and fix my wig, I go out in public dressed enfemme but looking like the man I am, just like John. If this opposes you, then don't look at me if you see me walking around the Mall, etc. I have been going everywhere like that for over 5 years and have never had a rude comment! In fact, what I usually hear is, "what a pretty outfit you have on!" I hear that often, since I do have pride in what I wear. I may not be the average crossdresser since I don't even try to "pass" now, but I would bet that there are a lot of us out here!
I have a hard time understanding your anger, as shown in your posts on this thread! I don't know what age you are, but you sound like someone who had a bad childhood. If this is true, I would reccomend some good therapy! Best of luck to you!!
Stephanie
Lady on the outside, but man underneath!
If some kid notices you trying on sandals, that is one thing - whatever.
Society consists of all ages. Kind of why it is important to dress decent when out and about.
Putting on a show and then bragging about it on a forum is probably not a bright idea.
Save the flaunting for grown MEN who might be gawking.
Last edited by Nicole Erin; 10-27-2010 at 09:23 PM.
It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.
Katgirl and john,
There are some cd's and ts that do look feminine due not to hormones or trickery. They have a fem body due to their genetic makeup. I myself am one of those. At 28 I had a 36/23/38 body shape. at 62 now and after grs/srs 12 years ago I have a 38/29/42 shape. still 5ft 3and1/2 ins tall. with seven kids and 22 grandkids that have known all their lives about my crossdressing and transition. They have all grown up or are maturing knowing that people can be different and accepting that difference in others. Only one of my grandkids have ever said anything about cd' or ts and that is a grand daughter that just this summer said that she doesn't want to be a girl. We are still taking her/him to a therapist to determine exactly where she wants it to go. And Kat for your information there are F2M ts that do pad and use false wiskers to protray men in public.
Danni
I too have natural breasts - if I were to wear a bra it would be 42B. I don't need to wear one since my breasts don't hold up a pencil below them.
My dimensions are 44-37-42 meaning my hips are a bit bigger than my waist. When I was young I used to have to get pants with a wider waist than necessary to fit my waist so the pants would fit over my hips. I aim to exercise and lose some more weight to get my waist down to 35 inches.
I have had no surgery or hormone treatments.
Last edited by JohnH; 10-27-2010 at 09:56 PM.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
Exactly! Lets keep this in perspective. IMHO, wearing capris and sandals with painted toenails (in itself) is not going to "corrupt" anyone, crossdressing does not "corrupt" ... not even little kids. Even persuade is unlikely but corrupt is way too harsh a word to use.
Sadly, I agree with this comment.
I agree with this comment too. Why is it that some folks put 2+2 together and come up with 5? We don't know what the conversation was like in the car assuming there even was one, and if thee was, why assume it was negative? The father didn't seem to care in the store.
The only thing that IMHO is a bit "near the mark" was flaunting it in front of the little kid. That wasn't necessary, but at the same time, IMHO you shouldn't have to hide anything just because you're a genetic male wearing capris, sandals and painted toenails. :2c:
.
The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
... that if someone were to ask you "boxers or briefs?" your answer would be "none of the above" and that you prefer to go "commando" under your skirt i.e. in the best tradition of the true Highland Scots? T.M.I. for most of us here, although this thread is getting better and better all the time
Airing Henry and the twins in this way might be O.K. in the summertime, and it was probably no coincidence that it was the Romans, Egyptians, Sumerians, and Assyrians et al who wore skirts back in the day because they enjoyed the luxury of living in a warm climates.
Oddly enough, this custom never took hold with the Vikings, the Laplanders, or the Inuit. Could it be that like the proverbial brass monkey, they were far more concerned with "shrinkage" or even frostbite than the occasional chafing or jock itch caused by wearing more traditional masculine garb? Just sayin'...
I alternate between men's briefs (Hanes) and panties (Hanes Her Way). The only reason that I wear panties is I found them in a box that was left by my former wife and they fit me. In either case there is no wedge of cloth as there is with pants. Yes, it is a compromise to wear underpants with my skirts but I don't want to be busted for indecent exposure.
Here in the Dallas area we can see temperatures as high as 40 deg C/104 deg F and skirts feel mighty nice under those conditions.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: He, him, his
Rachael,
I agree with everything you posted including the flaunting it. The reason that I did it was because he had already been staring for about 5 minutes and I was getting somewhat perturbed. Neither children or adults should just stand and stare. At his age he should have known better. I felt like he was trying to make me feel embarassed about what I was doing. I should also have known better and just ignored him rather than allowing his staring to get under my skin. When I was growing up. children were not allowed to stare.
You will become stronger in the ways of the Pink Fog. May the Pink Fog guide you and be with you now and forever.
This thread has become the proverbial car crash. One cannot help but to rubberneck a bit.
That said, on OP's premise that was presented, I agree we should not be put in a position to have to hide how we present provided we were respectful. That said, the flaunting appears to have been thought through clearly to the point where it was done and then bragged about without a lot of though as to why this may not have been the best behavior to engage in. Perhaps OP understands this now.
Back to hiding, I'm not seeing "toys-r-us" on my list of places to go when on an outing (hmmm, but you never know, "black friday" is coming up very soon). However, we will encounter children and again, respect is key. We don't know a thing about their upbringing, what they feel inside, what they might say to their parents, and heaven knows what the parent might say back later on. All we can do is to be the best, most positive ambassadors for our community as possible, no matter who we encounter.
John, while I respect your point of view, I find your comments such as these examples as having an absolute lack of respect for a vast majority of those of us in these parts.
In case you haven't realized, the tg world rests upon a spectrum. There are some with your POV, others wish to emulate women in every way, shape and form. And still others feel the woman inside of them to the core of their very being to the point where the prospect of transition becomes a very real dream, something that becomes a reality for many others as well. And this cursory illustration cannot possibly spotlight every point of light in between.
I have gotten my head around how you present and why it's important to you (no thanks to you, I might add). There are at least a few other members here who are of a similar mindset whose posts are thoughtful and respectful, ones who I enjoy reading whenever they come up. With their insight as to their place in this tg world of ours, I understand their POV and for that I am grateful.
That said, if the use of feminine names, pronouns, etc. bothers you so much, perhaps that other forum you mentioned is a better fit for you.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
Abigail, i love what you said, especially about how little influence we as TGers have, and also your comments on the back and forth of religious fanaticism.
Hi Jamie - I just re-read your original post and I didn't realize that the "little" kid was 10 years old. For some reason, I was imagining someone like 6 in my mind so to me 10 is not that "little". I guess it's now it is my turn to say I agree with you as at 10 I think he or his father should have known that staring is not polite.
.
The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
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