Fab GG anomymous question

[Marissa]

Yo I've got some super sexy pics yall should check out...no homo!

Careful, hon, you might offend one with that termilogy.. "no homosexual" would be okay to most folks..

Okay, I read most of the replies and I can understand the GG not actually posting the question herself.. so see if I can get this right.. someone hit on it a bit.. gay versus bi.. I would use the word 'most' but that could be wrong.. If one is transitioning.. its normally a given that they are attracted to only men..so until..the genetics change, they are gay. That is meant 'man with man only'. Now there are those who are transitioning that are only attracted to women and well end up being lesbians.. and still others are attracted to both sexes.. so bi.

For some of us that dress, we are not exclusive to being attracted to men.. yet predominately women..but as soon as we crave or taste man..(even if she is a cd or ts) then we are bi...

Okay, now if the GG who orginated this was looking at the area of forums that she has access to.. knowing that it was mentioned she was talking about her SO, she would have seen mostly tasteful pics...even if a 'girl' was blowing a kiss.. puckering..or bending to show cleavage.. its not for men..then again..some may want to be critique by other girls to see how they would be viewed by men.

Which brings up my thoughts on members here... men as members does not cross my mind..I have only seen a handfull (not counting FtM)...and a few were quickly removed due to being somewhat predators..

So any pic i would post, is for all to just see me.. even if i'm trying to be a silly girl, but I would be lying if I wasn't posing for another cd/ts/gg to say that I make a sexy girl.. but I have never posted here or anywhere else to attract men... well straight men that is.. then again, if they desire me, they are not straight :D

I hope the GG discusses this with her SO if she knows or believes that 'she' is trying to attract men..

I feel for her delima and hope all works out for the best.. wow.. I got through this one..NEXT!!!!

Hugs,
Marissa

[Cari]

This is just my opinion however when I first started taking pics I took my cues from the models in the fashion magazines and Ill admit it Playboy.
I was bound to get a certain look, Im flipping thru glamour and many of the ads fall into the category of seductive.
I found other sources for posing tips and my pictures tamed down a bit, these days I usually use pics where Im out with friends.

To be honest it never occurred to me that I could create a photo that would turn a guy on, I was just trying to find my inner woman and document allot work.
After a few uncomfortable e-mails, I changed my poses and expressions. I still occasionally get very uncomfortable e-mails but not as often.
BTW in person Im physically large enough that it isnt an issue but I have fooled a camera or two.

Saying or typing things like Kiss,kiss,kiss I feel get in there because they are so feminine.
Men dont even use the word cute often, so sprinkling in a few overly feminine expressions is one way to create the illusion.
I was never comfortable doing it, but do say cute and top allot more these days.
I think its just done as an concious effort to appear feminine; not to pick up men.
The ironic thing is that I seriously doubt any women my age are signing off texts to each other with Kiss,Kiss,kiss.

I think our perception of the sexes also plays in, Ive seen drag Kings or FTM's emulate actions that just make me wonder why.
Out of all the masculine traits why would you choose spitting as an example.

As CD's I think we have a very different view of what it is to be feminine and dont always make the best choices on which traits to emulate.
Support groups are great for that and I have had several SO's help me allot and I have been gratefull for that help.

[Rianna Humble]

Most cders say I love women and I am not gay yet they post pics and alot of them are always trying to be seductive with puckers, touching themselves and gesters plus say things like kiss kiss..yet do they not realize its men looking at their pics that they are coming onto ?

I think that there is a lot to the argument that those CD'ers are mainly emulating the look that they have seen attractive women use in magazines. There are definitely some members here who have posted pictures like that and are totally faithful to their wife, but in those instances the wife was encouraging them in the look.

I think it is entirely possible that a number of those who post the "sexy" pictures do not think of it as sharing them with men since we all refer to each other here by the gender that we present and on the forums MtF cross-dressers will present as female.

There are also CD'ers who dress for the sexual thrill and I would expect them to show more overtly sexy photos, but even then - as several posters have already said - they are often doing it more to attract themselves than other men.

I do not use the term "kiss kiss" but know that several of my GG friends use either the X's or terms like "mwah" when they write to me even though they are not looking for any kind of sexual relationship with me. In fact, I originally adopted the signoff "luv" specifically for those friends.

I don't have the answers, but hope that something in my ramblings proves helpful to the questioner.

[sarahNZ]

from my POV.. I think when a female who is not on the "market" who try to dress provoctive etc and tease etc do it not to validate their "femaleness" but it because they are lacking some selfworth of who they are and are searching for it in others when selfworth can only be found by that person inside themselves.. no one else can give it to them.. sure they can make them feel good for a short period of time but its like a tempory high.

I think once you have found your own self worth you are comfortable with who you are you no longer feel the desire to dress or tease for attention from others to get validation.

Why can a woman not just look good and dress to impress purely because she is comfortable in her own skin?, why does there have to be an underlying "read between the lines" with every thing a woman does? (I don't get it)

But to the question at hand...

I have posted a few photos in my time and some are more sexy than others. My answer is simply that the photos I post are of me in fem mode (some times I do feel like being sexy some times I don't) most of my sexy photos stay safely in my computer hard drive, but the reason for any photo is to capture "the moment" so I can look back upon them one day and say to my self "ya know... I looked ok!" Yes I know that the "onlookers" are a mix of GG and TG and yes some are men, if they or you look upon my photos and say "not bad Sarah" then I am happy, job well done (this time anyway) there is no underlying "trying to attract anyone issue" (my words not yours) that come with it. If people like my photos then I am flattered but they are more for my benefit than yours, I like to look back on them and say to myself that I got it right... hair, makeup, clothes, semi flattering pose etc. I like what I see, that is what matters.

For the record I am a male by birth and only look at women as a potential partner.

hope that helps but that is just my opinion.

[Kate Simmons]

Many get into the "spirit" of what they may think it's like to be a woman, i.e. flirting, provocative poses, etc. but if a guy actually hit on them for doing that, they would not know what to do. This is one of the "two-edged swords" for acting this way.

[Loni]

maybe it is time for the mods to censer some of the photos you talk about?

as for me i love to dress and work at looking like a real woman. not a man in a dress. i do not do photos, so i have not done anything like a sexy pose...for anybody's use not even mine.
some are more into the sex part then just dressing up. maybe this is how they let loose? i say as long as the said photos are in proper taste were is the problem?
i do not look at a skirt and think is it a man or a woman.nor do i get "turned-on" by looking at said.
i love seeing a pretty woman. some times i wish i could get into her jeans/skirt/dress/etc....but i will return them latter..ha.ha.ha.

to each there own, but maybe some other guide lines for the photos to keep it clean for your friend?

maybe i should look into the photo section...were is it at?

.

.

[Sarasometimes]

Well first of all without specifics we are all guessing as to who and what poses she is looking at. Secondly, although this is called Crossdressers Forum there are all variations here posting on all subjects. I have no doubt that I am only attracted to GG's/FAB's. There is sexual preference, gender identity and gender expression. All the variations of these are found here. If a GG posted such a pick would we presume she wants one of us to email her for a date? Statistically most men who simlpy crossdress that don't have any dsire to transition are heterosexual but there are al types. I also think that the majority of gay males don't crossdress. I apologize for generalizing but I'm doing it for illustration purposes. Also how would a CD look all dolled up doing a pose showing off a nice firm bicept? Not very ladylike or girly!

[Emily Ann Brown]

Where were the pictures posed? Posed to a site like ours I would think it could be a form of male one up...I look hotter than you. Posted on a public site or dating site is different of course.

Somebody one time said we dress as the woman we are attracted to. If your are straight maybe you get a LITTLE turned on by seeing yourself looking hot.

Years back I enjoyed the looks I get when pumping gas. I don't want a guy. It was like a meter of how good I was doing in looking like a woman, if men who had no clue enjoyed the view.

Em

[sarac]

I agree with the others that without seeing one of her pictures, you may be reading into it more then she wanted. I do on the other hand feel that there is a difference between taking pictures of yourself showing a fabulous woman and taking what is to be a sexy aluring photo. I think it would help if the girls that do take the " sexy " photos would coment on there feelings of how they like being pictured and if they are married as well. I have not yet posted my pictures here. I would like to say more as I am married also but very recently have become conflicted in my feelings and dont think I would have a right answer for your SO.
Thanks Sara

[Sarah Doepner]

For me it's all about the illusion. I know I'm male but I need to explore the female in myself and in order to do that I create a physical illusion. The better that image is at hiding the male, the less distraction I have in my attempt to understand my gender questions. It also makes it less likely that the gender questions will creep in and distract me once I'm comfortable with my feminine presentation. I don't think I use much in the way of cute talk in my postings, but I would guess that it's a similar effort on the part of those who do. Everything that can be done to push the male aspect away works to bring forth the female.

Honestly I'm rarely, if ever, taken for anything other than a guy wearing women's clothing. I really don't have to worry about sending the wrong message about my intentions or desires, but I understand, however unlikely that it could happen. If I were to post a photo that were alluring, my intent would be to illustrate my ability to control my appearance, not to attract anyone to my side. But that's just me. I would suggest our Anonymous GG try to find a way to discuss the question with her S.O.

[Kaz]

It is a great OP and the thread has caused me to think, which is I guess why a lot of us are here, despite the views of some..

Regarding the OP and her friend's SO's posts.. I cannot comment as I have no idea what they are like.

As has been saiud on numerous occasions, though we all share a unifying "bond", we are all different and have many different motivations and desires around this CD thing. There is no "one size fits all", and so I find it difficult to answer the OP.

Am I trying to pick up guys? If I was I wouldn't be here, I would be somewhere else... and I am not.

Am I trying to be seductive to other women? Why would any woman feel seduced by a guy in a dress? I don't get that.. although, yes, there are some GGs on this site who are attracted to some MTF CD folk. When people like me come across them I am so thrilled because I can discuss stuff openly, as i can with lots of guys here who share the same "affliction".. whatever we choose to call it.

So why on earth would I choose to show a picture of me looking vaguely feminine and enjoying it? Yeah... it's for me. It is me saying a little part of me wants a little existence for my CD side. If Kaz can exist in a virtual world, then she at leasts exists and this gives some affirmation of this side of me. Without it, I am just a pervert in a closet. So I post pics..

I accept that they may be offensive, but I only post them on sites that are dedicated to this genre, so don't think I can be accused of anything too indecent...

But I do take to OP's point... by posting pictures of ourselves, this can be offensive to others...

I will rethink my avatar... maybe it's time for something somewhat less offensive.

[Sarah Doepner]

I will rethink my avatar... maybe it's time for something somewhat less offensive.

Stop thinking. Your avatar is perfectly appropriate for posting here. If someone is offended by the sight of a crossdresser who is successfully creating a feminine appearance, they are in the wrong part of the Web. You look wonderful Kaz.

[NicoleScott]

I make up and dress in a style that pleases me. For all the times I transformed, many more were in private than for public outings. I am what I am and I like to take pics and share them. I also like to see pics of other cd's of all styles but particularly in the style I prefer for myself. Some people (cd's, gg's, men) like my pics and some don't. It's flattering to hear from those that do. I'm not trying to attract anyone for personal encounters, so it makes no difference to me if a guy gets turned on by my pics or puts them on his dart board. I won't know about it either way.

[Pythos]

In my case many of the poses I do are much like those that are done in WOMEN'S fashion magazines. You know, those magazines made for women to see different styles and so on. The women in these mags are in poses that are quite seductive.

I do not mind that men find my pics attractive, but at the same time I would far prefer having my pic page have having compliments from GGs.

Now that being said, I did take some heat when I commented on the poses and faces a member here posted. I did not think those poses or looks were very favorable to acceptance.

I have done once or twice the pursed lips pose....and dislike them. LOL

I asked a fellow member of flickr why it is we seem to love to present our hind quarters. I am not "presenting" as if I want a man to "do me". I personally find it silly how men are pretty much made to hide this aspect of their build. We men have rears, and if we take care of ourselves, quite attractive ones, or so I have been told by GGs. To be honest, I would love it if a GG would run her hands or finger tips along those areas, I would love that as much as I would hope she would love the same as me doing it for her.

For the GG that asked this question I have to ask. Why do women pose in seductive poses in magazines meant for women for the most part? Who are they trying to seduce?

I find the poses I do to be fun. I love to see how much in appearance I transform. It is only an example of how fragile and weak these male and female images truly are.

[JamieG]

I can't speak for anyone else, but I dress to please myself. I am 100% straight and monogamous. I take pictures so that I can capture my attempts to appear female and compare to previous progress. I like trying to put together outfits that are cute and look good on me. I take pride in the transformation and am constantly working to improve it. I post my pictures on this board because I like the way I look in them and want to share my happiness with others (and if I'm being honest, I'm probably looking for a little validation). Sometimes my pictures may seem a little sexy or flirtatious, but I am not trying to pick anyone up. I'm just emulating fashion models. I do not post pictures anywhere where ordinary men or tranny chasers are likely to see them.

[t-girlxsophie]

I couldnt be seductive if my life depended on it,i take pics that i hope look good,basically for myself that they may best represent me en femme (one day ill succeed lol) would it be better for others sensibilities,if we all put pics of us as a guy in a dress,scratching ourselves etc of course not,I think most on here post pics that we feel,best represent us en femme,I most certainly do,were not out to attract anyone.

As for ending posts with kisses,or terms of endearment,well women are more demonstrative,they hug each other or call each other hun etc.I end my posts with HUGS with no ulterior motives am just being nice

Sophie

[Sarasometimes]

I can't speak for anyone else, but I dress to please myself. I am 100% straight and monogamous. I take pictures so that I can capture my attempts to appear female and compare to previous progress. I like trying to put together outfits that are cute and look good on me. I take pride in the transformation and am constantly working to improve it. I post my pictures on this board because I like the way I look in them and want to share my happiness with others (and if I'm being honest, I'm probably looking for a little validation). Sometimes my pictures may seem a little sexy or flirtatious, but I am not trying to pick anyone up. I'm just emulating fashion models. I do not post pictures anywhere where ordinary men or tranny chasers are likely to see them.

JamieG,
I see that you are from eastern Pa., are there any stores you frequent and can recommend? I agree with what you and some others have mentioned and that is the fact that photos in magazines marketed for women have similar poses. Also it is said that many women dress to impress other women, not men although that is who they are attracted to. How many macho men are going to compliment their wives on their outfit and shoes? Can't notice that stuff, I'm MACHO!!!

[Lorileah]

What have we got to compare to? Look at any (yes any except Oprah) magazine and the poses the women are in are typically coy and/or seductive. Now look at any "Men's" magazine and not only are they coy and seductive but blatantly raunchy. Most fashion magazines play up the seductiveness. They want the women who buy the outfit to believe that when they wear that outfit they will be the little minx that was in the picture. Usually doesn't work out that well and the woman gets disillusioned and goes back to "her" style. The photos of staunch angry women went out with Kodachrome.

It is all in the perspective once again. How many TG's here have said "I dress like this because my (SO) won't?" We believe that the look in the magazine is how women should look. So we copy that. Just like everything else some tend to over do the look they want. What many would refer to here as not "age appropriate". Campy, over the top, sometimes just plain bad taste, but it is what some are told women do (ask the photographer...I was told once that women didn't put their hands on their hips with the thumbs on her back.)

I don't think the intention of most the posters here is to seduce a man. Most just try and emulate what the magazines have shown. Be honest, no one wants to see themselves as an everyday person. We see that ...everyday. When we take pictures we want to bee seen as glamorous, pretty, sensual. Pictures are but a slice of life. True that unposed pictures are more true, but the majority of photos here at least have a little pose.

The original question was why do the TG's here try and look seductive in their pictures. I will turn that back on the OP, do you want to show pictures of yourself not looking your best? Most of us spend a lot of time getting ready. We don't want a "Rosie the Riveter" picture we want a "Marilyn Monroe" picture.

Again I don't think the intent is to get men, but more often to please ourselves. I will ask the question here, exactly how should we pose? Like Whistler's Mother? Like a politician who is getting a portrait for the rotunda? Like all the snapshots you have of your family and relatives looking extremely bored on the sidewalk in front of the house? What you see as being seductive to us is probably more what we see as how we wish we could look in real life.

[JulieK1980]

While I don't post those sorts of pictures of myself anywhere, (I lack the self image to do so.) I think there are probably millions of different reasons why people do that. For example, for me, I WOULD be doing it to attract men or women, because I'm bisexual. However I believe many do it for their own arousal, or to boost there own self esteem. I don't think you can infer the desire to attract men based on a picture. Ultimately they post those sorts of pictures, because they feel good about doing so. It's more for themselves, than it is for others. At least that's my understanding of it.

[carhill2mn]

I agree with your GG friend. I, too, often wonder what the person in the photo is tyring to portray and to what purpose.

[SamanthaS]

This is a complex question Di. Thanks for the headache

[Kaz]

OK... so I have been enduring the headache for a short while... why do I post pictures of myself? It is simple... I want affirmation that me dressed and made-up works ok? If I look like a dog, I want to someone to tell me so I can work on it. I would like the right that all women have to wear and present themselves in any form they choose. Granted they have worked hard to wear trousers in the workplace (as did many men on their behalf), but the male stereotype has shrunk over the years.

So.. I want to dress and present as a woman. Where do I get feedback on this journey? Well, one of the reasons, if not the reason, I joined this site was just that. The galleries provided that narrative (sorry mods!). Other than that the feedback and discussion comes from sharing stuff... sometimes we may stretch the envelope (apologies... a technical term!)...

But it is good to be able to share our darkest secrets...

If we are offending GGs we need to need to be more robust on what we are allowed to post on public platforms, and maybe we need to be more closeted and private in what we really discuss.. I think this would be a shame... I would like to think that GGs use this thread as way of understanding where all us daft complex people are coming from...

Though I must admit, this thread has caused me to think twice about what we should post on this forum...

To the OP I hope my avatar doesn't offend... if it does you need to say so.. this is easily remedied...

[suchacutie]

I would like to look at this from the other side:

Here I am, an ordinary looking guy, who transforms into what I hope is a reasonably acceptably looking feminine being. Would I want to look terrible? Would I want to scowl in the pictures, or frown, or act in some other negative way?

Of course not! I would want to smile, be attractive. I don't care who's looking as this is about being an attractive creature, whether masculine or feminine. If I were to post a masculine picture here, it would certainly not be a negative one. Don't we all enjoy looking positive?

Ok, I do agree that being blatantly sexual is not appropriate for this forum, and if someone has done that then this is between her and her spouse, and none of us really have anything to say about it, right? Any speculation as to why someone might act "over the top" is just that, speculation, and, in my opinion, do nothing positive for anyone's relationship.

Di, I would strongly suggest that the two parties involved sit down and have a discussion, else we may be doing a disservice to their relationship.

just my 2 cents.

tina

[Cheryl T]

I don't feel my pictures are suggestive or anything.
I don't dress to please men or women...I dress to please me.
What I wear is simply an expression of how I feel at that time. Sometimes I'm casual in jeans and T-shirt, sometimes I'm glamorous in a gown, sometimes I'm classy in a nice skirt and jacket. It suits me for the particular day and occasion.
I don't go over the top with gestures and such...my spouse lets me know when I do and reminds me that women don't do that, unless.....lol.

[Kaz]

Ladies I have a question one of our GG's would like to ask,Thank you in advance.

Most cders say I love women and I am not gay yet they post pics and alot of them are always trying to be seductive with puckers, touching themselves and gesters plus say things like kiss kiss..yet do they not realize its men looking at their pics that they are coming onto ?
I just do not get it.
Enlighten me please.

This is one of those threads I fear where the discussion goes completely off the OP. and I apologise for my part in that... It looks like I completely lost the plot!

So Di... this is a GG who most CDers say loves women, but yet the GG is not gay (i.e does not love women)... but the CDers are coming onto them with various gestures? And your concern is that they are actually coming onto guys, not GGs...?