Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
I suggest you be STRONG and say flat out this is who I am to her. I suggest you NEVER show shame and NOT hide nor justify who you are.
I agree.

You aren't screwed, in a blackmail way, if you don't let her have any leverage. If she threatens to tell, say, "go ahead. I'm not ashamed of being who I am. I didn't ask for this to happen to me, but since it did, I accept who I am. In time, I hope you can to."

Maybe the marriage will last, maybe it won't, but don't live in fear.