Thanks for the replies, everyone! It is wonderful to read what everyone things about this. The common thread seems to be: "accept who you are and don't worry about 'why'."
And I can understand that. I can't explain "why" I find a red-headed woman gorgeous. I can't explain why I like big b00bs. Hell, I can't even explain why I like the sound of the wind. I just do, and that's enough.
But I have a bit of a problem no knowing the answer. I am a very literal, fact-oriented, problem-solving kind of person. EVERYTHING should have an answer, an explanation, a cause. Especially when it is something within myself. I can't just ignore the question. I mean, I've always ignored it in the past, and just enjoyed dressing, then bore the inevitable feelings of shame and self-deprecation and purging. Now, I want to understand this better. Understand myself better.
[sigh]
