How many women want a CD'er and no straight man?

[Rachel Morley]

Our own Rachel Morley is married to a woman who actively sought out a crossdressing man for a husband. Rachel is a very lucky lady, and her wife is a treasure.

This is true. I did meet my wife Marla on a CDing forum (not this one). You see Marla doesn't really like "regular men" and so she was looking to date a CDer as she knew CDers from before and always found them to be the type of partner she might want to be with. i.e. kind, caring, softer, gentler, less manly, never macho, more like a woman in their personality, and also someone who has a strong empathy for women, but most of all, someone who loves and looks up to women (Marla is somewhat of a feminist). Now all those things I just listed will not be enough to make a life partner as there are all the personal and intimate things that have to "click" to make the chemistry work , but my point is, she was looking to date a CDer in the beginning because she though they/we had the making of the type of partner she wanted.

I have no clue how many women there are out there like my wife, but girly, geeky, soft and gentle is what she wants from a "man"

[pinto]

This is wonderful Rachel and I am happy with you.

Thanks for the hint Lisa i will have a look.

[Badtranny]

I have no clue how many women there are out there like my wife, but girly, geeky, soft and gentle is what she wants from a "man"

...and I've gotta say that Rachel's wife is stunning. Absolutely beautiful.

[joannemarie barker]

I happen to have a very good friend who is actively looking for a CD male. The femmer the better. She would love to meet a pretty CD who prefers women but it's hard to find someone in such a closeted community. I told her she should join this site but she hasn't gotten around to it yet.

Also, I tend to meet a lot of women in clubs and bars who seem to be very interested in me until they find out I'm strictly dickly. I think the easy part is meeting women. The hard part is being comfortable enough with who you are that you're not creepy.

LMAO strictly dickly....love that :D

[Duana]

I asked my gf today and she said if we weren't together she would seek another CD. She loves it. I also met a gg at a club that said She loved CDs. The women are out there.

[Katie in Canada]

Hello,

I have been a member of this board in previous years (back around 2008), and also of the GG board (where are all the posts? Perhaps I need to reapply?) I just logged back in here today after a long absence. I would certainly be accepting of a CD partner, and have actively sought one in the past. It's just as difficult for us to meet you too!

KT

Hello KT,

You are absolutely wonderful...wish I lived in Glasgow.

cheers,
KJ
Victoria, B.C.
Canada

[SabrinaEmily]

I think i hear crickets chirping ...........

Nope.

Even ten posts in when you wrote this, nope.

[Lorileah]

check CL ,CRAIGSLIST ,backpage and other sites that have dating like alt.com

just check for w4t,w4w

OY, I don't think that is the kind of partner most women want.

[darla_g]

I have only seen a few women (GG) on here who expressed a preference for CDs. I have known a few women who are accepting of CDs, but would not say its their preference. I think people search out a partner that they feel connected with first. If they happen to be a CD, so be it.

[Kate T]

Again I wonder are we just pigeon holing and stereotyping ourselves again. Being CD and having an uncommon gender identity is just a part of me. It's not ALL of who I am. I would hope that one seeks out a prospective partner because they love all of you, not just a part of you.

[JustineFallow]

I have to say that alt.com does NOT have an awful lot of GG's looking for CD's. I dated a woman from there who wasn't specifically seeking CD's but found me interesting enough (her words, not mine!) to meet up. We had fun, but it just didn't work out long-term. The amount of women on that site who actually exclude CD's from their preferences is higher than the ones who welcome them, in my experience.

[Lip5tick_Li5a]

I had a best friend who was REALLY turned on when she found out I was interested in CDing, and she wanted to advance the relationship to the next level. Problem was, I'm asexual and she had a VERY high sex drive.

My biggest barriers in relationships have nothing to do with CDing. Since I have almost no interest in sex with anyone, I'm a dreadful boring lover. And since I have a lot of radical feminist views, I suck at being the attentive guy who gives her earrings and gets off on seeing her be feminine. Quite the opposite, I have recently found myself repulsed by such outward displays of femininity and submission. I've been told by my GG friends that I'm more like "another girl" or a "gay hairdresser" than a guy, hence their lack of interest.

In my case, if a girl wanted a CD, it would probably be a problem since girls who want CDs tend to do so because of sexual attraction. The problem is that my pumps are no more sexual to me than my Doctor Who costume. It's just something fun for glamor and dress-up, which makes me bad at fulfilling her fantasies.

[eluuzion]

Here is the important question...

Where are all of the statistics gurus when you need them? I thought for sure somebody would have posted a percentage figure guess of some sort by now. No wonder we can't find SO, we let all of this important data slip by.

I would do it myself but statistics are like reading operator manuals of new toys I buy. I am good for about 26 seconds before I lose interest and patience. I just like to see results, not all the details explained in two different languages mixed together...:D

[Aprilrain]

nope.

Even ten posts in when you wrote this, nope.

huh?????????????????????

[pinto]

so many more women are into TS then CD'S and the more passable/pretty you are the more they want to be with you.

I meet so many WOMEN WHO want to have a relationship with a full time TS

Hi Lisa,
can you explain what kind of women these are?

[ElusiveGirl]

In my experience as a CD (well, as an emerging pre-op MTF back then), lesbian clubs are generally terrible for meeting single females. Same for Craigslist, just avoid it.

Women who are into CD's tend to be creative, independent, and perhaps a little tomboyish. Very secure in their identity (and you should be too). Forget searching online. The only way to meet them is to go out, be seen, look good, feel confident, have fun, and laugh about the irony of it all. If you are a well-rounded, likable person with something to offer... the girls will be curious to know more.

[Amy Hepker]

I wish I knew where I could find such a Lady

[ReineD]

I wish I knew where I could find such a Lady

Amy, I think there are millions of lonely, single people (no matter the gender or presentation) who are not finding soul mates.

I love ElusiveGirl's answer just above yours. It's just a question of numbers, really, like finding a job. Go out there, meet lots of people, and eventually you'll connect with someone. But it won't happen if you stay home.

[Babeba]

Count me as someone who (looking back at my relationships of the past) has always been attracted to a somewhat feminine man. Dating a CDer really gives me the best of everything, as my SO is incredibly kind, nurturing, and supportive in ways which are traditionally male as well as traditionally female. Knowing what I know now about the sort of guy I'm attracted to, if Crystal was ever killed in an accident as she saved a dozen orphans from a burning building and I couldn't find the reincarnation of Cary Grant I would probably be very happy with another CDer.

Perhaps a bisexual woman that doesn't really desire a "man" to complete her is more apt to be receptive to the T minded lifestyle.After all,most of us are still "able to get it done"when it comes to heavier tasks in a household. So,we do have some value ! lol I think perhaps a lesbian with a woman's clothes store or shoe store might accept us better than most.

Rogina, one does not need to be a lesbian or bisexual in order to be comfortable within herself without making a man prop her up! I'm not convinced that a lesbian would be a receptive partner for a crossdresser (as opposed to a transwoman, perhaps who had completed her transition).

Hi Presh,
i didn't ask for the reason to find such a woman I just wanted to know. Ok, if i would meet such a woman you never know what will happen but mainly i am curious.

I know the answer to this one!! If you've got any respect at all for your wife, then nothing will happen! :D

If you are acting as though you are single/available to meet other women to possibly develop romantic relationships - and you are not in an open relationship with a firm, solid base and 100% open communication - then you really need to take a look at what you're doing to yourself and your wife.

[ReineD]

Reine is so right on this[at least for me].We have the ability to play the part of our fantasy woman and perfect her .Our energys go toward her and the SO takes the back seat. Perhaps a bisexual woman that doesn't really desire a "man" to complete her is more apt to be receptive to the T minded lifestyle.

Rogina, one does not need to be a lesbian or bisexual in order to be comfortable within herself without making a man prop her up! I'm not convinced that a lesbian would be a receptive partner for a crossdresser (as opposed to a transwoman, perhaps who had completed her transition).

I can't agree with Babs more. Rogina, I had mentioned a woman's dilemma when she is with a CDer who is more invested in the CDing than in the relationship. This doesn't mean she needs a man to "complete" her. A person of any gender would like to feel a priority in their partner's life, and not an afterthought.

Assuming the CDer is past the pink fog stages and can focus again on a relationship, there's no reason to believe that he can't find happiness with a hetero woman ... assuming there is no "yin/yin" situation and he in fact wants to be with a woman and not a man. A hetero GG will more readily accept her CDing partner's biological reality.

A lesbian wouldn't be into a partner with a penis, and there is a risk that a bisexual woman wouldn't either since, because of her bisexuality, she has the option to be with a real woman when she wants to be with one, and so might prefer her man to be all male. I remember reading posts in this forum from bi-women who felt this way. Others have enjoyed their partners' feminine sides, just like some of the hetero women do.

[Jenniferathome]

I think the percentage that "want" a cross dresser is probably close to 0. This is not to be confused with tolerance or even the fun that some couples may have together as "girlfriends." In my case, my wife knows and is totally supportive but doesn't understand it and I know she never will. So, why would someone seek out something they can not understand? undoubtedly, there's the unique woman out there that actually wants such a partner, but she would be a rarity.

[Badtranny]

I think the percentage that "want" a cross dresser is probably close to 0

Jennifer, this is just plain wrong. As I and others have said, if you just get OUT you would be surprised at who you meet. I realize that I'm a little different than you, but it is definitely not unusual to meet women when I'm out and about.

[pinto]

I think the percentage that "want" a cross dresser is probably close to 0. This is not to be confused with tolerance or even the fun that some couples may have together as "girlfriends." In my case, my wife knows and is totally supportive but doesn't understand it and I know she never will. So, why would someone seek out something they can not understand? undoubtedly, there's the unique woman out there that actually wants such a partner, but she would be a rarity.

Jennifer, if your wife doesn't understand does not mean all women don't understand. As i have understood from this thread is that there are women around that like the advantages of having a crossdressing partner. This can be for example to have a girlfriend who is does have the little extra or who can be also masculine once in a while. As far as i know there can be many aspects that ladies may like in a crossdresser. Hopefully there are much more than 0%. After reading the posts i am sure there are plenty around, they just need to be found...

[Imeni]

As a youngin' with a girlfriend who openly loves the fact that I do it, all I can do is offer what I feel that she goes through.

Like several ladies have posted here already, she's also Bisexual. She sees what I do as beneficial to her needs from both sexes. I'm still very much a guy in everything I do. Wearing a dress doesn't make me any less the guy I was. I'm sweet, charming, always make her feel special. But I'm also kind, compassionate and tender towards her needs as a woman because i understand a little more about women than most "Straight Guys" because I choose to find out as much as I can about the stuff she goes through. Plus heels suck. Hurt like hell. She loves that I can understand that. haha. She likes that when I go to bed, I can wear a silky chemise and a pair of panties and she can touch that as well as her man at once. She said its like, wanting a brownie when you are eating cake. Best of both worlds without the issues of dating two people at once. She loves that im unique. i do what i want to do, what makes ME happy but still make sure she wants me to do it, which she always does, just in case. So if she did have a problem with it, id take that into consideration. I love my woman.

[larry]

I am sorry to hear of your passing. Oh you didn't ? I am sorry. I just thought you were already living in Heaven.. !!

As a youngin' with a girlfriend who openly loves the fact that I do it, all I can do is offer what I feel that she goes through.

Like several ladies have posted here already, she's also Bisexual. She sees what I do as beneficial to her needs from both sexes. I'm still very much a guy in everything I do. Wearing a dress doesn't make me any less the guy I was. I'm sweet, charming, always make her feel special. But I'm also kind, compassionate and tender towards her needs as a woman because i understand a little more about women than most "Straight Guys" because I choose to find out as much as I can about the stuff she goes through. Plus heels suck. Hurt like hell. She loves that I can understand that. haha. She likes that when I go to bed, I can wear a silky chemise and a pair of panties and she can touch that as well as her man at once. She said its like, wanting a brownie when you are eating cake. Best of both worlds without the issues of dating two people at once. She loves that im unique. i do what i want to do, what makes ME happy but still make sure she wants me to do it, which she always does, just in case. So if she did have a problem with it, id take that into consideration. I love my woman.