I remember the first time I dressed. I was 12 and had stumbled upon some lingerie my mother had stashed away. Beautiful purple satin with black lace garter belt, panties and bra. Also had fishnet stockings. I put all that on and was just in awe of how great I looked. Of course being 12 you know what it did to my just-entering-puberty body. So my first time dressing resulted in a great reward. From that time until I moved out on my own my times dressing were limited to sneaking into mom's closet and trying on some of her things. Once out on my own I was too poor to afford any clothes other than the necessities which were my guy clothes. It wasn't until after I was married that I could start buying some things. It started with panties and some lingerie. Then I got a cute jumper dress, blouse and a skirt from a garage sale. I kept those few things for several years and would dress up only a few times a year, with panties and lingerie being a normal part of my every day wardrobe.

Then about four years ago I got a maids uniform from LD Fashions. I have since retired it, I need to get a new one. That one was worn out!

So for me I don't think it's an addiction. The release of endorphins has passed, to some point. I don't get the awesome rush out of going shopping in a skirt, or going into a store and trying on dresses while in drab. That rush only happened the first couple of times. Now it's just something I enjoy. I like to shop. That's probably way more of an addiction than crossdressing. However, I still have a real feeling of calm when I am dressed up. I just feel more at peace. You would think wearing a skirt when shopping would get my nerves up, but it's kind of the opposite. I can really relax. I don't know why it gives me such peace, but it does. Even wearing panties under my guy clothes to work makes me much more calm. So I really wouldn't say I'm addicted. I guess the only way to find out is for me to purge all my stuff and stop dressing, never visit this site again and bury Kylie away somewhere never to be a part of me again. But I can tell you that's not going to happen! So I may never know for sure.

*Hugs*
-Kylie