"She Shouldn't Be Transitioning"

[Kaitlyn Michele]

The whole narrative about TS regret is a bunch of BS...
Anyone that is actually involved in transition knows this.

On further thought, to me this is an interesting theoretical question, but its posed from the cisgender view...

If cisgender people (including cd's) are stupid enough to transition, that is their problem.. If your cogiati test puts you at probably transsexual, and you think "hmmm maybe i should transition.."...then that is your problem....

I know what i went through...i know what my first 45 years was like

...i will be damned if i will let people that think protecting somebody in a pink fog from "going all the way" is more important than me having a chance to survive

.....i will be damned to let the poster idiot for ts regret Charles Kane hurt my chance to transition.

[Aprilrain]

Glad you asked. It's not the medical treatment per se (so much, or anymore) - it's the differential treatment, which is a key part of the cultural apparatus that institutionalizes how trans people are viewed. This is a political and social point.

Lea

that is why it is important to me to get beyond being trans. we will always be circus sideshow freaks there are just too few of us to ever really make a difference and if a a TS person has a chance of living a quite life in their true gender undetected by the vast majority of people good luck getting them to shout their trans history from the roof tops.

[Elizabeth Ann]

The whole narrative about TS regret is a bunch of BS...
Anyone that is actually involved in transition knows this.

On further thought, to me this is an interesting theoretical question, but its posed from the cisgender view...

If cisgender people (including cd's) are stupid enough to transition, that is their problem.. If your cogiati test puts you at probably transsexual, and you think "hmmm maybe i should transition.."...then that is your problem....

I know what i went through...i know what my first 45 years was like

...i will be damned if i will let people that think protecting somebody in a pink fog from "going all the way" is more important than me having a chance to survive

.....i will be damned to let the poster idiot for ts regret Charles Kane hurt my chance to transition.

Kaitlyn,
I don't believe any of us want to stand in your way, and I am sorry if our language has provoked you to say some harsh things that I am sure you don't really mean.

Full disclosure on my position: my 21 year old son has recently announced that he thinks he is transexual. I have told her that I will support her in whatever she does, but seeing some apparent confusion, have urged her to proceed slowly.

It may be that few, if any, ever complete transition and then regret it or consider it a mistake. But this forum is littered with stories to individuals who started and never finished. I don't know why they abandon their plans, and whether they regret starting, or not finishing, or whether they are happy where they are. Would they have started if they had known they would not finish? Do their desires change, or do they lack the will and resources to proceed? I wish I knew.

Like you, the question has become very personal for me. There are many possible paths to life, and we cannot possibly know the end to each, or even the one we are on. Your own evident passion illustrates what a monumental choice this fork involves. Your path may be clear to you, but is it too much to try to help those who are confused or have doubts about which path to take?

Liz

[Alexis L]

It should be noone else's business as to why someone would want to transition. In America especially, you have freedoms but also responsibilities, as in if you make a mistake you must take responsibility for it. That is also part of being a responsible person as well.

What about if someone's crossdressing has to do with feeling like they have acquired a female body? What about if one's crossdressing creates significant gender dysphoria with their birth gender? What about if they don't feel like they can function as a male in a relationship as well as sex? What about if living as a male is depressing? What about if the feelings of self acceptance is much higher as a woman? What about if they just feel closer to the female gender? Or even, what about if they love being a woman so much that it means that they want to acquire a female body?

One person cannot every truly understand another person, and if they think they can they are being arrogant and insensitive. There is no way one can truly get into the head of another person. So if people can't, then why should they judge them?

People that are judgemental and assholes many times don't judge and be an asshole because they are concerned about that person, they judge because they feel threatened by that other person, either in terms of prejudism or that they threaten their belief system. In other words, either these people have an idea of how the world should be and get angry at people that don't conform to that worldview (say for instance, the cisgendered idea that men should not be looking like women or being one, because that is degrading to the male gender), they have a prejudist belief of that person (they believe for instance that even transsexuals are still men with the mind of a man, and for women that's also judging men in that all males are testosterone driven perverts or potential creeps) or they just feel plain uncomfortable and blame the other person for why they are uncomfortable rather than taking a rational, closer look of their own feelings.

In terms of loved ones, they get in the way because they either feel threatened about losing the person that they knew, or they may genuinely be concerned but may be prejudgemental and think that that person is just being crazy or foolish. Either way, its their own problem and not the other person's. Why should someone have to be responsible for the prejudism or inflexibility of others? If we had to be responsible for the ignorance or pain that others suffered because of their own flaws in not adapting, then what freedom would there be in this world? NONE!

I don't mind if society makes sure that someone understands all the potential risks in doing something, but they should not discourage or try to get in the way of someone doing something like transitioning. It's especially hard for passive people or people pleasers (or people who depend on the approval of others innately) to do something if society gets in the way, even if they feel strongly about doing it, and not doing it for them will only cause long term suffering and/or an impaired / unhappy life.



BTW, I know that especially FTM transsexuals and boyish presenting Genderqueer females, quite a bit of them DID NOT have GID for much of their life, maybe because the female gender is more free in expression?

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Elizabeth thanks...i wasn't really commenting on this specific thread which has a whole bunch of interesting thoughts...no worries...

i was just more speaking to the whole idea of how there is a bias against transsexuals that bleeds into everything...especially the idea that its important to protect fools instead of helping transsexuals...

It is just flat out smart to take your time if you are doing this stuff, ....luckily its a really long slog, and the reason many people drop out is because of it... which is also to reiterate my point, non ts people just don't go through all that crap, and the whole idea that TS regret is an "issue" is baloney...

[kimdl93]

I guess I'd be surprised that anyone would undergo SRS or any other major invasive procedures simply for cosmetic reasons. I would think one would have to be very highly and genuinely motivated to take the risks, endure the discomfort and financial burdens, not to mention the social stigmas, associated with transitioning.