Question for all of you in the closet

[Foxglove]

Everyone meanders along the path at their own rate, and also some of the paths diverge based on different personalities, different life circumstances, and different needs. Please accept this.

Spot on.

My wife has known for 35 years, I told her when we started dating. I was closeted for the last 50.

C'mon, Jess. You had 50 years? Then maybe the rest of us are entitled to a bit of time.

I finally came out to myself only about 5 months ago. Now I would like to get out in public, and perhaps some day I will. But I'm not pushing it. I'll take it at my own pace. I need time to get comfortable with myself first.

One of my main considerations is where I live: a very small town where I'd stick out like a sore thumb if I were recognized, which I undoubtedly would be. It might make sense for me to move to a larger place. A TS friend of mine recently concurred with me on this. So perhaps that's what I'll have to do. I'm considering my options, but I will go at my own pace.

Jess, your question is valid and there's no reason not to raise it. But two provisos: you've stated that happy comings-out outnumber the unfortunate ones by about 100 to 1. Not so sure of that myself. I'd want to see some scientific data.

Secondly, I think you're falling into what I call the "St. Paul Fallacy": "What is true of me is true of the whole world."

Best wishes, Annabelle