Amy,
I think you are a pretty normal CD. The stresses of being a single parent. The day to day running a house hold. Excelling at your job. Would be a lot for anyone. You are a very strong individual.

You need an outlet for your stress. I can recommend a lot of ways to reduce stress:
Exercise, talkings to others, dressing, playing outdoors with the kids, ect...... First, I really think you need to know in your heart, dressing is who you are. Most CD's have internal struggles with self acceptance for longer than we ever want to admit. I suspect you are still adjusting to your feminine side. I really did not totally come to grips till my late 40's. Your mileage may very.

I would buy things and feel terrible later. I questioned myself, who I was, why I was this way. Quilt, Fear, and Shame ran my life. I finally had a long internal struggle with myself and came to the conclusion, I was OK. I am not hurting anyone, I enjoyed my fem side, and was a more comfortable person to be around. My wife, has noticed the difference, when I do not let my feminine side surface often enough.

I am sure you will meet the right women. Some where you are least likely to expect it. Give it some time, good thinks happen to good people.

This sight is helpful to understanding who you are. A support group would be a great help, if one is available to you. Some people need a therapist, but not all, just a suggestion. This journey of CD self exploration is a hard road. I hope your journey only has soft gently rolling hills.