Nice posting, Freddy.

Over the course of the years and years I have engaged in crossdressing, the majority of them included the inner war with myself over my gender identity. I reached the conclusion that I'm a crossdresser with some pronounced transexual tendencies. I say this because I know that had I been given the choice, I'd have opted to be female rather than male. Most of my life I've wished I could have lived my life as a woman. However, the transition/surgery route is one that I've never really wanted. And thankfully, that war is over. I struck a peace with myself and the life I have made.

I think it sucks that this community has this strange pecking order that causes some to look down on others as somehow inferior. It's nuts, if you ask me. Unlike our friend Wildaboutheels, who simply enjoys wearing feminine attire from time to time, when I crossdress I engage in female emulation, where I'm dressed head to toes in women's clothing, don prosthetics to enhance the image, wear a wig, and apply makeup to "complete" the look. In essence, I try to look like a natal female as much as I am able, and part of the reason is that there is a part of me that desperately wishes I was a woman to begin with. There is this unspoken opinion that floats about in our community that suggests that unless you follow through on such feelings, and go ahead with transition and SRS, that you are somehow a lesser being. If you'd like a taste of this condescending attitude, you can visit our Transexual forum from time to time. It's not always like that, but it's definitely there. Unless you engage in this final act of desperation, you aren't worthy of opinions that matter in the least to the community at large.

I'm calling hogwash on that one.

I'm relieved that my inner war is over, that I've called a truce with myself that doesn't include transition.

I'm grateful to be "just a crossdresser".



Of the entire CD/TG community, only a very small percentage