Ever thought you were TG, and . . .

[AmandaM]

A lot of times it's hard to know what to do. For myself, everytime I get closer to Ts'ism, I start freaking out and push back. That may mean I'm not TS, but I'm not sure. Anyway, I knew this CDer who went on hormones and lived as a woman for a long time, but never had the surgery. Now she's back to living as a guy, buy still crossdresses. So, even if you go the TS route, you may change course in the end.

[Beverley Sims]

In order to find out where I stood I spent a lot of good money.
I visited the analyst on Brighton pier. Paid my 20p.
I have the card given to me right here.
It has my weight and fortune printed on it. They are both wrong, and no advice about what I am.

Today as previously I am in shorts and a top with my cleavage showing.
Sometimes I wear a skirt, and sometimes in drab.
Look at all the pretty clothes in the shops, look at the pretty girls looking at the pretty clothes and continue my with my life.
My big worry at the moment is smelling smelling like a polecat.... In the makeup threads.
The rest will have to wait till I can consult the analyser in Brighton again.

[linda allen]

It seems to me that anyone who thought that he/she was TG and decided in the negative is not likely to be a member of this site.

It seems there has been a shift in "crossdressers.com" since I joined. It seems most of the posters now claim to be "transgendered", not just straight male crossdressers.

Me, I have never thought I was transgendered, just a straight male who likes to dress as a woman from time to time. I'm still a member though.

[linda allen]

Altho I'm a "TG" by definition because I dress, I don't feel like I am. .

By whose definition? This is "crossdressers.com", not "transgender".com. It is possible to be a straight male who sometimes dresses as a female. That is defined as a "crossdresser". Nothing "TG" about it.

Not that there's anything wrong with being transgendered.

[Henna]

I was listening a presentation during the weekend, which was organized by a local support group. There was a person, who strongly identified him/herself as TG. As she told about her and his life, I had tears in my eyes, as at least how she explained TG...just isn't me. I was hoping to find myself from that definition, but how she explained, was that there is such a distinct difference between her and his life, that they are pretty much two different persons.

I just feel as one person, albeit a bit divided, but not that much, that I could separate two lives from me.

[SandraV]

I go back and forth on it. Sometimes I think I should be a girl, then sometimes I think it's a pipe-dream. I wish I knew if I was a CDer or a TS. It'd be a whole lot easier knowing how to view myself and/or what to do.

This is exactly how I feel. Confused...

[Cheryl T]

Always knew I was, never thought I wasn't.

[Sharon B.]

I stay confuse, would so much like to live as a woman but that doesn't seem feasible at this time. There are times when I enjoy being a male but for the most part I would rater be female.

[shawnsheila]

I know the label "TG" has been applied to me and CDers in general, for me at this current stage in my life, I love my male parts and enjoy being a male part of the time. If i could take a pill or magically transform into a GG (temporarily) would would do it in a heart beat as long as I know I could go back to being male. I enjoy dressing up and looking pretty/sexy as a woman and also looking dapper as a male. My inner gal and my outer guy both love women and have no sexual interest in men so I guess I would be a hetero male / lesbian female in the sexuality spectrum.

To sum it up in one sentence for me: I am a woman living inside of a man's body rather comfortably (yet still enjoys being/looking feminine) and I am a lesbian. If that fits in the TG label then I am TG

[I Am Paula]

I know we all feel better when we've found our own label, but this is nit picking. A CDer who identifies as male as Sly Stallone, and a TG gal who identifies with Madonna, are still under the same umbrella, and have things to offer here. We're supposed to be the tolerant ones.-Celeste

[Nikki_C]

The more I read, the less I know.

What are labels? It's a tag sew on the back of the dresses. :p

[jodie k]

i don,t know and i don't care --- as long as nobody hides my clothes

[Laura28]

I dont know what i am. I know this i am man who loves to dress as a woman, I have "Man Boobs" (38C) and love them (so does my wife : ) ) I am working on making myself a better looking woman, and hopefully someday could go out and pass. I am also BI curious and want to be the woman in a trist with a man, but i also love being a man and love my wife and would never want to change to a woman. Does that make me a CD or a TG i dont know or really care, i am happy living my life the way i am and i am lucky to have a wife who loves me for what i am and supports me 100% even after 30 years of marrige.

[ReineD]

It seems there has been a shift in "crossdressers.com" since I joined. It seems most of the posters now claim to be "transgendered", not just straight male crossdressers.

Aside from the fact that the term "transgender" means different things to different people, I think the reason that some forum members prefer the term "crossdresser" is that it describes an action as in, "This is what I do. I put on dresses and it does not affect my gender identity". But over time and with a lot of discussion, people are discovering motives behind the need to put on dresses that are beyond the more superficial reasons of liking the way the fabrics feel or finding it relaxing. They are discovering that there are deeper differences between themselves and the men who have no wish to transcend gender boundaries by appearing female, even if they do not want to transition.

In your next post you mention being a straight male. The people in this community span attractions to all five: opposite-sex, same-sex, both-sex, neither-sex, and to themselves while dressed, so one's sexual preference really has nothing to do with the desire to present as the opposite sex/gender except maybe the last one.

-------------------------------

Which brings me to a question for Allisonthegoddess: Have you been attracted to GGs in the past and are now discovering an attraction to men, and would this be a prime reason why you are questioning your gender identity? Just wondering.

[Marleena]

All I know is don't call some people transgendered if they're a crossdresser!

Be careful with labels..

[linda allen]

Aside from the fact that the term "transgender" means different things to different people, I think the reason that some forum members prefer the term "crossdresser" is that it describes an action as in, "This is what I do. I put on dresses and it does not affect my gender identity". ..

There is a forum member who has stated that I am "trans" a couple times when responding to (arguing with) my posts. Apparently, she feels that if someone straps on a bra and steps into a pair of panties, that person is "trans". I don't agree.

When I read posts where someone wishes they could bear children, were born in the wrong body, that they feel their penis is a birth defect, etc., I consider these people "trans", and that's fine with me.

I have none of these feelings. I like to build and repair things, use tools, and face the world as a male. If I could, I would inhabit a woman's body (a switch with my wife) for a couple weeks to see what it's like, but on the condition that I could return to my own body at a certain time.

It's hard to put something as complex as a human into a "box" with a label, but if I have to, I'm in the box with the straight, heterosexual male crossdressers.

[JessiJ]

This is such an interesting topic. I know that at certain times i have felt i was TG, but then that feeling is rare and comes and goes like that wind. Right now i am pretty sure i am just a high maintenance cd, lol

[Jamie_CD]

Personally, I appreciate the term transgender precisely because it is ambiguous - by being such a catch-all, it provides a safe place for people trying to sort all this stuff out. After early teen years of desperately wishing I were a girl, I spent most of my young-adult life trying to figure out if I was a gay or bisexual male, never considering the possibility that it was gender, more than sexuality, that I really wanted to understand. It is only recently that I have started spending time as Jamie (and have become much better informed) that I have started to think of myself as transgendered. Will I end up transitioning? Or living more in line with DoorMat's TG definition? Or something different entirely? I don't know. All I know is that for now it's nice to finally have some label I can use to describe where (and who) I am. This is hard enough as it is. Please don't take that away from us.

Jamie

[My Lady Marsea]

Lets try it this way, one word at a time as far as TG -TS go.
TRANS: “across,” “beyond,” “through,” “changing thoroughly,”
GENDER: refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviors, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for men and women.
SEXual: refers to the biological and physiological characteristics that define men and women.
So TG is one who has the wrong body for the gender inferred, displayed or presented, and TS is one who has had SRS or wutever physical changes so the body and the gender match. I so totally can't understand why a CD, TV or any of many other acronyms are confused. I think under most true TG/TS situations, one doesn't like change back n forth. Just 'cuz someone wants an "umbrella" to go under doesn't make it all encompassing. Just my 2 cents.

[linda allen]

Lets try it this way, one word at a time as far as TG -TS go.
TRANS: “across,” “beyond,” “through,” “changing thoroughly,”
GENDER: refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviors, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for men and women.
SEXual: refers to the biological and physiological characteristics that define men and women.
So TG is one who has the wrong body for the gender inferred, displayed or presented, and TS is one who has had SRS or wutever physical changes so the body and the gender match. I so totally can't understand why a CD, TV or any of many other acronyms are confused. I think under most true TG/TS situations, one doesn't like change back n forth. Just 'cuz someone wants an "umbrella" to go under doesn't make it all encompassing. Just my 2 cents.

And that's why I don't like being labeled "TG", "Trans", "Transgendered", or anything like that. Because I'm not. I know me better than anyone else and I know what I am and what I am not. Once again, I am a straight male crossdresser or "CD".

For those folks who identify themselves as something else, that's fine. If the time comes when a label is necessary and I know which one you prefer, that's the one I'll use.

[kimdl93]

Honestly, I think that its usually the other way around. Most of us start out thinking we are deviants, pervs, flawed or defective human beings. It takes a long time to get past these notions and begin to understand that cross dressing can be an expression of gender variation. And Most of us don't start out on this journey even realizing that there are other options besides "M" and "F".

But, I wonder if you're using TG to mean something other that transgender. Transgender can include a spectrum of different blends of M & F in indeteriminant proportions. At the extreme ends of the TG spectrum would be fetish dressers on one end and transexuals at the other. If you really mean transsexual, then I suppose there are some individuals who jump erroneously to the conclusion that they are transsexual, but with time learn that their somewhere else on the TG spectrum.

[Melissa_59]

Having said that, if I could magically transform into a woman, I would love the opportunity to experience that - well, at least the good parts of being a woman. Not necessarily interested in the totality.

I'm with you Colleen, except I would go for the full deal - no exceptions. I've always thought that I was in the wrong life, but I'm too far along in life to change. But if there was some sort of magic pill, potion, incantation, or injection that would change me overnight, I would be bumping other people out of line.

Sadly, I'm stuck with my current body.

~Melissa

[Rogina B]

I kind of lean toward the term GQ[gender queer] as it may be a better "umbrella" label.We are all behaving differently than the norm of society...hence the "queer" part of it.

[ReineD]

When I read posts where someone wishes they could bear children, were born in the wrong body, that they feel their penis is a birth defect, etc., I consider these people "trans", and that's fine with me.

You're describing transsexuals, who actually only represent a small percentage of the members here.

But, men who wish to appear feminine are not like men who would DIE first before putting on any item of women's clothing. There is a huge gray area between a regular guy and a transsexual. A lot of people in this gray area call themselves trans or a variation of trans (transgender, bigender, genderqueer, dualgender, middlepather, CDer, etc), and many (most?) have no real wish for facial feminization surgery, real breasts, or SRS, even if they like to fantasize about some of these things. They say they are "trans" because they know they are not "cis", which means having no interest whatsoever in crossing any gender boundary ever, even if it is with just clothes, let alone makeup, wigs, forms, etc.

If I could, I would inhabit a woman's body (a switch with my wife) for a couple weeks to see what it's like, but on the condition that I could return to my own body at a certain time.

Case in point. :D

I have none of these feelings. I like to build and repair things, use tools, and face the world as a male.

As an aside, I love to build and repair things and use tools too. This is not the sole domain of men. Single women who want to save money or women who like to build and design things learn how as well, and they can actually become quite good at it.