A vacation with my wife...(with a catch)

[Miss Mandy]

My wife has agreed to go on a vacation with me for four days, the only catch... I must become her female BFF to include a full body wax and a set of salon quality nails. Another stipulation...I will only answer as Miss Jessica for the whole time...this will include thinking and talking like her for the duration. We are looking at an urban vacation to Atlanta. Also, we are planning on going to a male strip club, taking shopping trips, and having a few salon sessions together.

I must admit, the male strip club idea has me a little nervous, but is equally intriguing. Should I go and be a women fully, or should I retain a bit of my male dignity?

p.s.- we have both had a few stressful years lately...do we use this an excuse to "reward" ourselves...

Miss Jessica

[S. Lisa Smith]

Wow, what an opportunity. If it were me, woman all the way...I'd be nervous about the strip club also.

[Julie Gaum]

Could this be a trap? Before you go as Miss Jessica to a male strip club you need to discuss how she expects you to act. Normally
girls at such a club will ogle, leer and just act silly without taking it too seriously. So will she be looking for gay tendencies while there?
Come to an agreement before you go! Perhaps I'm just being suspicious. In which case no harm is done.
Julie

[Stephanie47]

Girls can get pretty wild at those shows. I am assuming you're going to a reputable place, so there will not be any opportunity for you to stuff $$$ into a guys jock strap. Shucks!

[carhill2mn]

Are you kidding? Most CDs would "kill" for a chance like this!

[whowhatwhen]

Before you go, try to get your hands on some Canadian Tire money.
Show those male strippers just how much you love them by shoving 5 cent bills under their $10 bill.

[Jenniferathome]

This doesn't sound "fun" but rather some pseudo-S&M kind of thing. She wants to dominate you and seemingly humiliate you. That is not a vacation nor my idea of a good time.

[Maria in heels]

Jessica...I think that you should go for it!! It sounds like a wonderful time and you shouldn't pass any of it up.

[Kathy4ever]

I would go for it in a heart beat. Enjoy yourself and appreciate your wife for such a great vacation.

[May(be)]

I have no idea your history or what your relationship has been founded on, but I agree with Jennifer in that I don't think this is a wise move for the health of your marriage. Obviously, you know the dynamics of your relationship better than I do.

That having been said, hopefully this won't make you give us TMI, but why is "reward" is quotes? I'm sure I'm just being naive...

*** I think I figured it out... yup! I was being naive. Do what comes naturally, I suppose.

[JulieK1980]

I think I read this one on Fictionmania once quite a few years ago.

If this is serious, then by all means go all out, and don't forget to be grateful for a wife, that accepts you, and clearly enjoys the domination aspect of a relationship that I'm guessing you like!

[DebbieL]

My wife has agreed to go on a vacation with me for four days, the only catch... I must become her female BFF to include a full body wax and a set of salon quality nails. Another stipulation...I will only answer as Miss Jessica for the whole time...this will include thinking and talking like her for the duration. We are looking at an urban vacation to Atlanta. Also, we are planning on going to a male strip club, taking shopping trips, and having a few salon sessions together.

This is an EXCELLENT IDEA!! This will help both of you sort out a number of different things that may have been issues for her and for her. First, it will give you a chance to experience what it's really like to be a woman, including the spa treatment, and all of the other things she has suggested. You will be amazed at how beautiful you look after a full body wax by a professional. You might also want to ask her if she wants you to get laser hair removal.

This may help you decide whether or not you might want to transition, it will help her to experience you and get to know Jessica, who may be significantly different from the man she married, and she might actually love Jessica even more than she loves Jess (or whatever your male name is).

I must admit, the male strip club idea has me a little nervous, but is equally intriguing. Should I go and be a women fully, or should I retain a bit of my male dignity?

Absolutely you should go as a woman fully, even to the male strip club. This will give both of you the opportunity to experience handsome and attractive men giving you kind and positive attention as women, and will help you experience men as a positive experience. You may decide that men are not your thing, but by being open to the experience, you may find that you can experience more pleasure with you wife in many different ways. Keep in mind your wife is taking the chance to experience you as a woman, possibly even as a female lover, which may be as awkward for her as you experiencing a man. If you let yourself enjoy the experience of being a woman flirting with a man, you may both have a lot of fun.

p.s.- we have both had a few stressful years lately...do we use this an excuse to "reward" ourselves...
Miss Jessica

I suspect that by the time the vacation is over, both of you may have opened up to new experiences that will have both of you loving each other and expressing your love for each other in new and exciting ways. You may even find new combinations or activities that you both enjoy.

I would also suggest that before you go, that you read some of the books by Sarah Desmarais - on Amazon books. Including Three Weeks in Dallas, Room and Board, and "A Change in Our Marriage". There may be some aspects that you would embrace immediately, others you may need some coaxing, and some may be hard limits, but you may find that you could have a whole new level of excitement in your marriage for both Your wife, and you as Jessica.

[Ceri Anne]

That sounds like a great offer from her. By all means go for it to the max! I would be drooling at the oppertunity. Particularly the salon sessons together. As for the strip club, go, enjoy and be your best female self. I do not know about your sexuality or how long and supportive your wife has been. If she is recently aware of your dressing, this could be a test to see if you are leaning towards being gay. Either way, have fun with her, let her lead the way and don't be surprised if your little guy tries to express himself at the strip club. It doesn't mean your gay, just reaction to a sexually charged situation.

[Eryn]

If it sounds appealing to you you should do it. It sounds like a "total immersion" experience and you are likely to learn a lot about Girl World.

I'm not sure about being called "Miss Jessica" for the whole time, though. Perhaps just "Jessica" would be better!

[Alice B]

Go, go,go and have fun, fun, fun. What an opportunity.

[ReineD]

I must admit, the male strip club idea has me a little nervous, but is equally intriguing. Should I go and be a women fully, or should I retain a bit of my male dignity?

LOL. You're asking, in a CD forum, if you should engage in a bit of forced feminization with your wife, and go to a male strip club dressed fully as a woman as her BFF? And you're asking CDers, many of whom fantasize about men while dressed, what they think? :D OK.

Anyway, your story is eerily familiar to a post you made in September. If you did go with your wife three months ago, then why would you feel nervous about it now?

FYI, when I was in my 20s and my female friends were being married, we did have a few bachelorette parties (female version of stag parties) at places with male strippers. It was a hoot, but no one really payed any attention to the guys. lol They were fun to watch and all (they gyrated nicely and it wasn't full nudity), but we were having much more fun being there as friends, having drinks, and playing the part of the excited female (a bit of a role reversal from how we imagined men behaved with female strippers). We'd act all raunchy, try to whistle by putting our fingers in our teeth, and generally just make @sses out of ourselves and have a grand ol' time. And then .... *sigh* they broke the magic. At around 10 or 11PM, they'd let the guys in. Turns out their "ladies nights" were just a marketing ploy to fill the house with women, in order to attract the men later and sell twice as many drinks. :p We'd leave then, because more often than not, the pickings were slim for those of us who were single. Who wants to meet up with a guy who shows up at the tail end of a ladies night, hoping to get a little action? :p

[Miss Mandy]

Dear ReineD,

Unfortunately, the September trip did not materialize...my wife has been working out of town for the last few months. However, she comes back for good in about a week.

In short, I am afraid I might like the experience of seeing these naked men...however, I have never considered myself gay or bi...perhaps as Jessica, it becomes a moot point?

[Leslie Langford]

LOL. You're asking, in a CD forum, if you should engage in a bit of forced feminization with your wife, and go to a male strip club dressed fully as a woman as her BFF? And you're asking CDers, many of whom fantasize about men while dressed, what they think? :D OK.

Anyway, your story is eerily familiar to a post you made in September. If you did go with your wife three months ago, then why would you feel nervous about it now?

FYI, when I was in my 20s and my female friends were being married, we did have a few bachelorette parties (female version of stag parties) at places with male strippers. It was a hoot, but no one really payed any attention to the guys. lol They were fun to watch and all (they gyrated nicely and it wasn't full nudity), but we were having much more fun being there as friends, having drinks, and playing the part of the excited female (a bit of a role reversal from how we imagined men behaved with female strippers). We'd act all raunchy, try to whistle by putting our fingers in our teeth, and generally just make @sses out of ourselves and have a grand ol' time. And then .... *sigh* they broke the magic. At around 10 or 11PM, they'd let the guys in. Turns out their "ladies nights" were just a marketing ploy to fill the house with women, in order to attract the men later and sell twice as many drinks. :p We'd leave then, because more often than not, the pickings were slim for those of us who were single. Who wants to meet up with a guy who shows up at the tail end of a ladies night, hoping to get a little action? :p

Reine, it is my understanding that it is becoming more and more popular for GG's to hold their bachelorette parties at gay clubs - and more particularly - in the ones that also feature drag shows. I wonder if a similar - yet in some ways also different - dynamic is at play here.

They seem to enjoy the interactive trading of thinly-disguised barbs with the drag queens that is often part of their performance, and the b*tchier, raunchier, sarcastic, and pointed the jokes are, the more these bachelorettes seem to get a kick out of the whole experience. Kind of like being at a celebrity "roast", where no one takes themselves too seriously, nor is overly offended...

Granted, the more that copious amounts of alcohol are consumed at these "stagettes", the more the inhibitions are cast aside and the wilder it gets. But it also seems that these GG's feel safer and more comfortable acting out in such an environment, as the risk of being hit on by "regular" guys there is minimal. On some level, they also seem to regard these drag queens as just "one of the girls", and therefore feel free be themselves without the type of sexual tension that usually exists in "normal" mixed company.

Any comments from a GG's perspective such as yourself to better help us understand this?

[Jenniferathome]

LOL. You're asking, in a CD forum, if you should engage in a bit of forced feminization with your wife, and go to a male strip club dressed fully as a woman as her BFF? And you're asking CDers, many of whom fantasize about men while dressed, what they think? :D OK.

and I thought this forum was the last bastion of objectivity. Where's my head at?

[ReineD]

Well Miss Jessica, not to worry then. Really, male strip shows are quite tame, you'll see women acting more like teenagers at a rock concert (it's all just a put on to have harmless fun, a few drinks and a few laughs), and the guys don't get naked. Personally, I quite welcomed the opportunity to temporarily view a member of the opposite sex like an object (or at least pretend I was), after having grown up in a family where my mother was the typical 50s housewife. It was rather liberating! :D

But it also seems that these GG's feel safer and more comfortable acting out in such an environment, as the risk of being hit on by "regular" guys there is minimal. On some level, they also seem to regard these drag queens as just "one of the girls", and therefore feel free be themselves without the type of sexual tension that usually exists in "normal" mixed company.

Any comments from a GG's perspective such as yourself to better help us understand this?

Can't speak for other GGs, but I personally feel safe anywhere, whether it is a regular club or a drag club, whether I am there with my SO or with female friends, or even if I should go alone. There are too many people around for it to be dangerous, mind you I don't hang out at dives by the wharf. :p I don't understand why so many members here think that we feel threatened in any way when guys come on to us. Some GGs enjoy the experience, others become annoyed (depends on whether they're looking or not), and if they don't want to be hit on, I honestly can't think of a GG that would be so shocked by the experience that she would be tongue-tied. She goes to that club knowing it is a club and she knows that people in clubs come on to each other, and she is perfectly able to tell a guy that she's not interested and then just ignore him.

And on the topic of hootin' and a-hollerin' over muscular young men or drag queens, there's an age for that too. It was fun when I was in my 20s, but honestly, my youngest just started college and I'd feel awfully silly behaving that way over someone who is just a few years older than him. There comes a time when our definition of fun changes.

As to considering the drag queens like one of the girls, in my case, no. I don't know any women who dress like that, who put on makeup like that, and who appeal to gay men like that. lol. But, I do enjoy the costumes and the shows. One of the drag queens in our town is very nice, and when she's out of costume (this DQ is TS and not a gay male), then she feels more normal to me. But it's hard to look at someone in all that getup and consider them one of the girls. Besides, many of them are gay or straight males who do this for a living. They are not TG.

[Beverley Sims]

Use it as an excuse to reward yourselves and strengthen you relationship if that is what is needed.

[GabbiSophia]

I believe there has been millions of CD stories written just like this ... and cd's everywhere would LOVE for this to happen!! Good luck and stay safe in ATL.

Steph

[jami]

Don`t pass it up. Go for for it girl

[stephNE]

I say go for it. It sounds like fun to me and I would go if I had the chance. If you don't go you may regret passing up the chance forever. Of course, if you don't like it you never have to do this again, but will know more about yourself.

[Cdone2]

If that were offered to me, I would do it in a heartbeat!