I have nothing really to add to the excellent words others have already offered. Don't ever think that your husband is the way he is because of any failing on your part. We all are only who we are. We can no more change who we are than change the sun.
There are many wives SOs that communicate here. There is also a forum just for you (Loved Ones). Generally speaking wives are well respected and most welcome here and we will try to give you all the support, answers, and help we can. You are special here and special to your husband because you do care and are looking for answers. Your support of your husband is something he will love you for even more. You are the angel of his heart. All we can offer you is our viewpoint but I think you will find us all open and honest.
Cheers
Annette