Anne, I am sorry to read this, as I know the steps you have taken. I fear the same reaction from my wife as we begin to discuss the future progression that is possible in the coming years. I am lucky in that my wife gave up her interest in physical male intimacy over a dozen years ago, but the clinging to the "man" in her life will be difficult as this is the issue that has clouded her knowledge of who I really am to date.
Her response, in light of the educational opportunities provided leads to the conclusion that your discussions, and the therapists discussions just did not resonate with her. I don't know if you observed the "light" going on during your discussions or not, just an observation to help explain why she reacted as she did, knowing it would be so hurtful.
This is rough on you, and will require yet another example of your strength and resolve. I pray you have a reserve, and that your wife realizes it might be an overreaction. Give her some time, but I know you cannot give up who you really are.
Barbara
