A marriage is give and take, but that does not mean that you both have to give or take. There are some things that just can't be dealt with, especially something you cannot understand. The majority of traditional marriages is based upon the male being the strong one, the rock, the provider. Your SO is losing that security on which she has based her life with you.
Unfortunately there is very little support for the SO of a transgendered person, even this forum can only provide limited support. It is time to sit together, decide what you want out of your life together and if you can't come to a compromise, in which both of you give and take, then it could be time to say "Sorry I have to do this, we can't agree on a way forward".
Time to look deep into your heart and make a tough decision.
