I feel so bad for you since you had to do this. When I got divorced, I went to court presenting female. I didn't even have my legal name change yet, but had been living full-time as a woman for a few months and decided I wasn't going to let this situation stopme from being my true self. When I entered the court room I went up to the clerk to register. I said, "My legal name is Paul N**** but I am a transgender woman and prefer to be called "Paulette". The clerk looked at me and replied, "yes, and you are a pretty woman too!" Now that made my day! I was so taken aback by what she said. There was no reason for her to compliment me. Yet she did. That so cool! I stood there in front of the judge. She listened to both our stories. She didn't give me any kind of a hassle. Everything was cool. My x-wife explained that because I had chosen to become a woman, that was the cause of our divorce. I agreed. It was over before I knew it and I left. To make a long story short, I have often thought about that day and take pride in the fact that I had the courage to do what I needed to while dressed and presenting myself female.
I'm sorry you didn't have that experience. I wish you could have just went there as yourself. It would have made you feel so much better, and the results of your divorce probably would have been exactly the same. I don't know about your state, but here in Michigan divorce is a "no fault" state. All the judge is concerned with is dividing up the property/assetts correctly. It's all split 50/50 no matter what the cause. So I knew I had nothing to lose by dressing and presenting myself as the woman I am. I wish it could have been that way for you.
Paulette
