I have gone through menopause and have never had a hot flash either. My moods don't swing and my sex drive has actually increased because my estrogen level has dropped and my testosterone is at the high end of normal. It could be the cross dressing subconsciously affecting her feelings towards you? You did say she no longer sees you the same way. For me it was my marriage that killed my interest in men. I went through the dating scene and met a couple of guys who want to date me but they are boring and don't make me laugh. I just can't make an intimate connection with someone like that and I certainly don't need another man like my ex. You know your wife better than anyone so unless she has given you reason to mistrust her then believe her. I think it's sweet that you are concerned about it. Maybe you should try to make her laugh, take her on a few dates just man and women no cross dressing talk and see what develops. Actions speak louder than words. be an observer.
