Feeling embarassed by dressing in front of spouse

[maya1love]

Hi all:

Was just curious how many of us feel embarassed by getting dressed in front of our spouses? Is there a reason for this feeling? Are there specific items of clothing that make us feel embarassed like just wearing bras and panties with no wig on? Would be curious to hear your thoughts.

[Rachael Leigh]

If my wife was one who accepted I might be a little intimadadted not sure embarrassed is the right word.
However its not likely ever going to be an issue.
Now I will say I have been dressed in front of her a couple of times but not a usual situation.

[Debra Russell]

I have and depending on her reaction it can be uncomfortable/embarassing - panties, nightgown = no pblm in her presence, everything else can be an "adventure" and generally gets a She doesn't seem to mind seeing me dressed - just not getting dressed but shows some sort of interest in what stage of being dressed I am in if she walks in unexpectably Oh and some times it's too much..............................Debra

[maya1love]

Hi ladies -- so is it that we are uncomfortable because she might feel uncomfortable, or is it because we feel uncomfortable on our own?

[Jenelle]

My gf is very accepting so there is no issues on her end. I have no problems already being dressed in front of her but I feel weird getting dressed/undressed in front of her.

[Annaliese]

I have no problem dressing in front of her, with everything except a wig. For some reason that is the only thing that bothers her I would be alright with it if she was.

[dana digs sweaters]

Hi Maya, no spouse and No embarrassment at any level of dressing in front of SO
Why? No secrets kept. No secrets to hide.

[Dianne S]

I feel a little funny getting dressed in front of my wife, especially when it comes to putting in the breast forms. They're silicone and look a little like actual breasts... it seems weird to see them sitting on the dresser waiting to be inserted.

Once I'm dressed, I'm fine.

[Leslie Langford]

My wife neither wants to see or meet "Leslie" - nor even look at a picture of her, so it's really a non-issue in my case. And after 42 years of marriage, the odds of that ever changing range somewhere between zero and nil...

Funny thing is, there are at least a dozen GG's whom I have gotten to know over the years and who have met "Leslie" on numerous occasions (make up artists, nail techs, photographers, writers, boutique owners, consignment store owners etc.) They are super supportive, enjoy "Leslie's" company, are always happy to see her, treat her just like any other GG, and I feel totally at ease being dressed in front of them.

[Kate Simmons]

My GF has absolutely no problem with me dressing in front of her, nor am I ever embarrassed.. Although the first time I did it her eyes came out of her head and she said "whoa" when I put the wig on. She said she thought I was a completely different person.

[cdterri]

For whatever reason I feel uncomfortable if she sees me in a bra and forms

[PaulaJeanette]

Oh heavens, yes. Embarrassed...that is the exact word that I feel! Although my wife knows that I cross dress (she has know for a few years) but has only seen Paula dressed once for a few seconds. She came home early from work and caught me dressed in lingerie, pantyhose, and heels. Ever since that moment, I have felt embarrassed for her, mainly that she knows and saw me. Because I don't wear make up nor a wig, basically, when she saw me, what she saw her was her husband's head on top of a female body. I can't imagine what an in-congruent image that made in her mind!

As for the discomfort, I believe it is mainly mine. She once told me I need to get over it and I know I should but it is a big step. Maybe someday...

Thank you Maya for starting this thread...

[kendra_gurl]

My wife has seen me hundreds of times fully dressed and transformed. I am comfortable with that.
She has seen me undressing while still in makeup and wig. I am comfortable with that.
Sort of as in this tootsie clip.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=...9D865B34AED264

Now think of Dustin Hoffman in that same clip in his foundation undergarments and padding and makeup but without the wig covering up his taped forehead and wig cap. I am NOT comfortable with that.
It is not a very attractive sight for her and I don't even look at myself in the mirror at this stage of dressing.

[maya1love]

I agree that it can be embarassing for us as men to be seen just wearing lingerie and makeup without being fully dressed. I think we may feel less than men in the eyes of wives.

Kendra, I have always found that clip in Tootsie to be so cute!

[Caden Lane]

When I was trying on new outfits in front of my GF, it was the first time anyone had seen me fully dressed. So I already had anxiety on board. But once I got past that, I noticed that I didn't want her to see me in any transitional state of dress. I didn't want her to see me without my wig or see me in my lingerie, forms and wig without my outer clothes. Keeping in mind, she's seen me in panties before.

I think it goes back to the fear, shame and guilt that I grew up with. Those things are dying a slow death within me, but they've been a part of me for so long, they are almost all I know. So finding joy in my dressing has been a hard road. But her acceptance has helped immensely. But I think it just goes back to shame and guilt. With time, I think it will fade away.

[Beverley Sims]

I read some of these replies and then wonder why some don't understand why their wives are not accepting.

Well it is the same underlying situation as to why you feel embarrassed.

Be tactful in what you do.

[kendra_gurl]

So True Beverly.

[Suzanne F]

I don't feel embarrassed at all. I do get anxious as she can be critical at times while I am dressing as far as how the clothes are fitting or hanging. It is better if I can get finished before she sees me if possible.
Suzanne

[Mickey M]

My wife is very tolerant of me and tells me she
wishes she had my figure. I'm 5'8" 135 to 140
I'll just say that she is not, but luv her.

[Nikki A.]

My wife was tolerant in the right mood but not accepting. However the closer I appeared to looking female the worse she would push back. So it was at most a little adrogenous just to keep the peace.

[Nadine Spirit]

Nope, no embarrassment, she has seen me in every possible stage of dress/undress. Maybe somewhere in my memory is a faint tickle of an idea that years ago, like maybe 20, I was possibly worried, but that is so tough for me to remember it quite possibly could be a fake memory.

I think that my lack of concern is because she has been with me every step of this journey, so way back when, when I was only partially dressing, she obviously saw me not completely dressed.

On a side note, I find it interesting how many of you feel weird about your SO seeing your forms.

[Melissa in SE Tn]

Maya, I love this thread & reading the responses to date. I can't comment since I am in the closet, but I love reading everyone's responses . Mickey-- 5'8" & weighing 135 lbs.-- my green eyed monster wants to devour you. What a figure you must have!! Peace, mel

[MetalGurl]

I can't speak from experience and say "Man, did I ever feel embarrassed!" because I never have. But I do think I would be embarrassed and probably would be for the first few times. However, I think that is mostly due to the fact that I've always been self conscious and overly concerned with what other people think of me my entire life. Needless to say, it makes what I do even harder.

[Tracy Hazel Lee]

Long answer : Hell no! It's rare that she wears anything girly or feminine. And because of that, most of the time I can look better than she does (especially with makeup). I'm not going to be embarrassed by that.

[lingerieLiz]

My wife doesn't mind seeing me put on panties. I don't need or wear forms so putting on a bra is easy enough. I do feel weird and tend to walk into the bathroom though. She doesn't mind nightgowns but doesn't like real lacy ones.